Interesting call from an elder this morning

by sabastious 54 Replies latest members private

  • sabastious
    sabastious

    An elder called my wife's cell because it was the only number he had on hand. She answered and he asked if I would call him back.

    I had a meeting with this elder and another about 4 months ago. It went really well, I stated my feelings and doubts and they felt I was just a man on a path of his own and left me alone.

    I have never held any position in the WT, pretty much just got baptized and fell off the radar so they don't feel me as any kind of threat to the congregation.

    My family on the other hand are trying to get me DF'ed.

    They know my internet screen name and have been printing out "incriminating" statements made by me on this forum and have finally submitted it to the elders in my congregation.

    So I call this elder back. I have been preparing myself to a JC meeting (because of the game my family is playing) so I feel I am ready for anything. Fortunately the elders I am working with are very understanding.

    The elder started out asking me how I was doing and if I still felt the same way I did the last time we talked (the last meeting with them I told them I didn't need help from the congregation and that my path was personal, they respected that), I told them I was still "good" and very happy.

    Then he said he had just one quick question for me: "Who is Sabastious?" He gave me an out, he asked me of this "sabastious" was just someone trying to mess with me, he gave me an opportunity to lie, it was pretty obvious what he was trying to do. He wanted to see if I would lie if I had an "out." Pretty savvy actually.

    I said that "sabastious" was indeed me. I promised myself I would not lie in these situations, and I am holding myself to that.

    He asked me why I said the things I did on this site. I told him that this is basically Group Therapy and it is so helpful because the people I talk to here don't know me personally and have no vested interest in the decisions I make, a trait I cannot find in my family or congregation. He seemed to understand what I was talking about.

    I then told him that I felt very violated because he was holding onto a packet of my most personal thoughts, and they were being used to incriminate me. I asked him how what I say in group therapy could be used as evidence for anything. I told him that what I say here could be influenced by any number of factors. Taking what I say here, out of context, is useless as evidence for anything and that the only real way of getting my opinion is to TALK to ME (not spy on my group therapy). Every time him and me had talked he has understood my position. So the only REAL evidence he has (talking to me) has been a good and understanding experience.

    I said it was intrusive to go out and find my threads which do not encroach anyone in my family or my congregation's lives (they don't even know the posts exist), they had to seek it out, and that's on them.

    He said something like "Alex, it just sounds like you doing what we are all doing, trying to figure out where we stand in this world."

    It was pretty encouraging to hear an elder say something like that. It gives me hope that maybe if the Elders in this organization stand up for what is right, maybe change will come, maybe we will be able to get our family's back.

    -Sab

  • miseryloveselders
    miseryloveselders

    The fact that they're monitoring you, makes me hesitant to comment on this thread. At the same time, I'm glad you posted this. It's interesting how family can do all they can to make your life miserable. Truly, there is no greater enemy than family at times, even when they mean well. Let me ask you, is it your immediately family trying to put you in the hot seat? As in your own flesh and blood? Or is it family from your wife's side? I'm glad you mentioned that not all elders are on that gestapo crap. As many guys as I know in this organization, I can say confidently that many of them have good hearts, they just haven't been exposed to the other side of the arguments that we discuss on this forum. Even those that haven't, want to avoid Judicial Committees, and DFings. Most just want peace and quiet in the congregation. Of course there are the other "more ambitious" brothers out there. Hopefully you don't have to deal with any of them.

  • Nathan Natas
    Nathan Natas

    Next time you talk to him, ask him,

    "Are you married?"

    "Do you have kids"

    "Do you have any savings?"

    "Do you own your own business?"

    "Do you own a car?"

    "Do you own you home, or are you paying a mortgage?"

    Allow a response to each question before moving to the next question, and only after he has answered the last question, ask him

    "How will they feel after I sue you for harassment, invasion of privacy, intentional infliction of emotional distress, and denying me my constitutional right to freedom of religion and your family becomes homeless and don't have a pot to piss in? Do you think The WATCHTOWER will make you whole after that?

  • baltar447
    baltar447

    Honestly, since I assume you've been inactive for some time, if you're not actively associating with other dubs, trying to nail you in a JC sounds like a waste of time, sounds like he feels this way.

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    It was pretty encouraging to hear an elder say something like that. It gives me hope that maybe if the Elders in this organization stand up for what is right, maybe change will come, maybe we will be able to get our family's back.

    Please be aware that even though everyone is playing nice right now it all could turn ugly very quickly. I'm hoping it won't but going on what I've seen in the past on this board I feel it has a good chance of getting ugly.

  • PSacramento
    PSacramento

    It seems that this elder is an "understanding" type, but I worry that "seems" is all that it is.

    One wonders WHO gave him this info.

    I know you said your family is trying to get you DF'd, which is in of itself quite sad and disturbing, it seems Jesus's lessons of love are, will, lost on some people.

    Hope things work out for you Bro, I really do.

  • carla
    carla

    Your family are trying to get you df'd? A question I (a non jw/never been) have for your family and the org is, 'how in the hell could this not be a cult?!?' only a cult treats people this way. Oh, I forgot the Nazi's also had a similar program.

    I have a whole host of questions for your spying family and elders! The anti family attitude of the org preceeds itself that is why they are a dismal failure in their door to door annoy the neighborhood work.

    I would suggest your elder may have his own doubts and knows the score that is why he is giving you a break.

  • wannabefree
    wannabefree

    I don't quite understand. You have posted links on here to videos that you have made and put on Youtube. How can there be any question as to your identity or whether or not you are indeed apostate?

  • jay88
    jay88

    Is their a thread with your personal story.

    I can not believe your family would attack you like this.

    I have been reading your stuff longer than I have been a member, you have been a stable to this forum and a benefit to me.

  • Heaven
    Heaven

    Maybe this guy will join up here. Maybe he has his own questions and doubts. We can only hope.

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