Ahh, I can see exactly where jgnat is coming from when she says that JW guys do have qualities that are very attractive, and I definitely agree. While his intolerance is very unsettling for me right now, my JW boyfriend does have many many qualities that set him apart from the run-of-the-mill barfly. That's why I ended up getting involved with my boyfriend - I knew he was a JW before we started dating, but he has so many redeeming qualities.
He's just so sweet and caring and sensitive and pstient, he's very attentive and he does so many things to make me smile, and he seems to take great pleasure in making me happy (present holiday situation notwithstanding). He has a great sense of humour, he's quiet and gentle, he's not a party animal like most guys I know (I'm not a party animal, either, I'm very quiet and private, so that's a great quality for him to have), and he just knows how to make me feel special. We're in contact every single day and we have a long phone call once a week (between the time difference and his job and my school schedule, we don't have many times when we're both free to talk on the phone), but sometimes, he just gives me a quick call to say hi and tell me that he loves me, just out of the blue, to brighten my day, and he always sends me short emails from work, no matter how busy he is, just because he knows I like it. And when I went to visit him over the summer, he picked me up at the airport with a box of chocolate truffles (I'm a diehard chocoholic), a single red rose (cliched, but still my favourite flower) and a big history book (I'm a history major in university, I love history books), not to mention the fact that he's the one that put up the cash for the plane tickets - $1000 (American) just so I could come to visit him for a while. He knows what I like, he knows how to make a girl feel special, even if he is completely and utterly inexperienced in dating, he makes me feel worthwhile, like I'm important to someone. With the exception of the current issues I have with him because of my love of holidays, he's everything I'm looking for in a guy, he really is. Sweet, caring, quiet, sensitive, patient, attentive, funny, gentle, everything I thought would make a perfect guy. I guess it kinda figures that there has to be a monkeywrench in there somewhere - I think there's a natural law out there somewhere that keeps me from having a real fairytale relationship, so I get a guy that seems so great, but happens to be a Witness.
So that's the reason I'd like to see if this relationship will work, if I can still salvage it, because even if he is a Witness and he's very intolerant about certain things that bring me so much joy and happiness, like Christmas, he is a very sweet person and we have so many things in common. I know that these things don't always work out, and when they do, it's still difficult, but he really is a good person that I really care about, he just has a lot of issues because of the WTS's teachings.
Anyone else out there have stories about the good qualities of JWs, outside of their beliefs?? I know that most stories tend to be negative, but surely someone else out there has had some good experiences...?? And of course, negative stories are still welcome, I'm open to hearing all sides of this issue!!
And thanks again, everyone, for all of your advice and suggestions and stories, I really appreciate it, this is just what I need right now!! I'm so glad that I've found a place where people understand my situation and are so supportive. Keep the posts coming!!
-Becka :)