by drew sagan 48 Replies latest jw friends
Drew: Do you really want to get yourself back to a routine that you really don't want to do? From my own experience, I've signed myself up for things that my heart really wasn't in, and I was miserable until I could extract myself.
Just a thought: she might see what the organization is all about if you ask some simple questions - like how does the GB represent the FDS?
If I go in deeper my relationship with the Elders will become tigheter. I will be at their side more. Of course that means she will have a more in depth look at how the religion really functions through me.
Hmmm... One of my first thoughts was that perhaps it is too bad she wasn't raised an eLDER's daughter. If you feel you can take it, perhaps this has some merit.
Overall, I think it is too much work for the direction that you REALLY WANT TO GO.
Personally, I favor Materialism. The journey will be so much more enjoyable.
No matter what JW's say, it has never killed anybody (do not confuse Materialism with Greed).
Mustang
(who is only offering encouragement because you seem doomed to such a fate)
like how does the GB represent the FDS?
As soon as you mention something like this the apostate flags start to go up faster than imagine. Mabye I can add that she also has very little faimly "in the truth". Only one of her parents converted and she has a sis she dosn't see much. So her expierance has allways been on the fringes, instead of deep inside the organization. Which makes it much more difficult to help her see the true problmes that exisit.
Drew, is your wife online very much?
How can you help connect her to finding info for herself online?
At our home, as soon as we say, "I wonder how/why/when xxx happened..." we simply go over to the computer and look online for answers. We read different websites to see how broad the perspectives are.
If you come home with a question from a householder or someone at work (you can make this part up I suppose), you can discuss it... and then research it.
607 seems to be a very effective research point.
At any rate... I wouldn't put too much trust into going full bore as a way to open her eyes, because if she was raised JW she will probably deflect the things you think are obvious. She'll just 'wait on Jehovah'.
bebu
I understand that it would send up apostate red flags, but their inability to respond, coupled with their viceral reaction, would allow you wife to see the real face of the organization. I understand that it would start you down a DF path, but that might just be what she needs to see.
I understand that it would start you down a DF path, but that might just be what she needs to see.
This is exactlly where I am coming from. My only opinion on the matter is... should I start the process as a strong JW, someone who is not lazy, someone who wants to serve God the best he knows how? or Somebody who has basically drifted away from what in her mind is "the best way to serve god". My fear is that if I continue us down the path I've been going she will eventually feel that the choice is between me or the organzation. If we expierance a rise and fall togeather with loving supporters all around us (basically my family), I think my chances at helping here see through the WTS foggy window will be much better. VERY IMPORTANT: Also, don't think i'm going to be going into Robot mode. As we do the thigns JWs are told to do, I will also be expanding the horizons. My library is filled with all sorts of great resources. More than anything I feel that I can get her to be much more open if she feels that her relgion and beliefs are not threatened, and by being a better witness this may be possible
Personally, I don't think it will help. I think it would give her false hope, and in a way, you'd be messing with her feelings. Although you'd be doing it for her own good, she might not see it that way if she ever finds out that it was all a plan.
Do you know of any in your area who have experienced abuse at the hands of a JW, only to have it covered up? Is there any way that someone like that could talk to your wife?
One doesn't have to KILL someone to convince others it's not the right thing to do. Same thing applies to drugs, rape, robbery, arson, assault you name it. I don't like the idea for the simple reason what if, through your new found deceptive zeal, you actually encourage, lead, and or assist someone to follow the WTS. Is that a good thing? I think not.
Proverbs 3:5,6 says.... "Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not unto your own understanding. Acknowledge Him in all your ways and He will direct your paths."
OT.....
This may come off a little harsh but my intention is not to hurt you.
What age are you? Do you realise every day you are spending in that religion is a day off your life. You are living a big void now and utterly wasting your life. I am not saying like you are missing seing hte world or something. But in your own home you cant even be the man you are/want to be. You cant express your honesty, you cant even read what you want to read. What ever any religious perople say as a retort to "what happenes when you die". Nobody knows, insead of giving up on life on a dream life yours now.
You are also deluding your wife, all her life she has been living an illusion. Despite how had the shock is, she cant be protected from everything. Should she be protected from the man you really are/want to be? Is it fair for her in the long run. How much longer are you going to devote to the cult? Its easy to count how many hours for 6 months. 5h meetings 2.5 h FS = 180 hours. You could build a small house if that was turned into labour. And think of the thousands of hours you have to live the Watchtower Dream, reading the crap, "discussing" the crap, being fed the crap, fighting over the crap, dreaming about the crap, feeding your wife more crap to let her swim in the crap. Repeditive isnt it.
I protectd my mother until I was 20, she is supposed to be my parent i.e. more knowledgable about the world than me. Yet I am protecting her from the real world by putting up with all that crap for about 10 years. Its the worst waste of a life for a delusion.
I think the problem here is that you are trying to use logic to deal with an irrational situation!
If you "go back", your wife will be happy - and you will be miserable - and your inevitable demise as a Witness will only be postponed.
I continue to suggest that you and anyone else reading this, that's in a similar situation, consider claiming depression and leave
it at that! Jehovah's Witnesses are, above all, irrational and lacking in sound thinking ability when it comes to religion.
Many of them - perhaps all! - will eagerly 'buy into' a good claim of depression, as the reason why you don't do anything anymore.
I know that many do about me.
metatron
