"You have a week to Move out" PLEASE HELP! I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO!!!!

by stillAwitness 78 Replies latest jw friends

  • stillAwitness
    stillAwitness

    Yesterday morning was my bookstudy. But I had a runway show to do that night (I think I have mentioned before that I have been pursuing modeling) and so of course I had to skip out. My parents go to a differ bookstudy than me but in the same hall and so they were able to notice that I was not there. I told them I went anyway when my mom called me later that day not really caring one way or another if she had known I really wasn't cause my nerves were already going crazy about the show.

    So this morning she and my dad announce that they knew I was lying, that I was not at the bookstudy and that "anyone who is a liar and not serving Jehovah whole-souled needs to leave their house." So they have announced that I have a week to move out.

    WHAT DO I DO????!!! I am only 22 but its a mixture of emotions. The main part of me wants to leave. It is time for me to finally get out on my own. I can't live like this anymore. But another part of me is scared out of my mind. The only plan I have is to move in with my boyfriend. He's been very supportive of having to deal with dating a JW and has encouraged me to finally break free from that life for some time but I'm afraid of everything in the Real world! Afraid of paying bills, afraid of walking the streets at night, afraid of what I may become. Afraid we get to so poor that we will end up on food stamps-hell I'm afraid of the dark.Of course, my bf and I are serious and I would never just move in with some random guy. At the same time he lives downtown and so the job I have now which really pays well and is stable I may have to leave cause it would be 45 minutes away from him. On the other hand-I don't even know if my parents will let me keep the car!!! Its in my mom's name of course, and they pay the insurance. Even if I could keep it I have a DUI on my record (years ago during my dumb teen years) and the insurance will be so high I don't know if we would be able to afford it.

    I really need some advice. I dunno if my parents are serious (honestly, they are not tottally mentally all there-thank the WT for that one) but even though, I feel like them kicking me out may be just what I need. Besides, the odds of the elders harassement and possibilty of me getting D'F won't be as great right? Since they are the ones who asked me to leave instead of me leaving myself??

    I have been trying to get in touch with my brother(he's not a witness) but to no avail. So Please help guys!! I am SO SCARED!!!

  • OpenFireGlass
    OpenFireGlass

    well ya gotta start somewhere... moving in with your boyfriend is the first step of living in the real world... How will you ever learn how to live if you don't jump into life?... Have Faith in yourself...

    PEACE, Mike

  • KW13
    KW13

    well, i think IF possible without negatively affecting your life you should leave, i really am sorry about your situation. I've been there also and i had a nights notice, it hurt a lot. I stayed with family, could ya go and SEE your brother?

  • OpenFireGlass
    OpenFireGlass

    I just wanted to add that I was out of my house at 17 without a pot to piss in... slept on the street for a couple of nights too... but here I am...

  • mkr32208
    mkr32208

    YOUR 22! Oh my god... Well... Your hot too! Wanna come live with me?

    Seriously, move the f**k out already! Tell boyfriend his wild hedonistic single days are over! It's time for the wild hedonistic days with YOU to start! Don't be scared either! Come on this is a GOOD thing! Shoot another year living at home and you'd have become a pathetic star trek nerd!

  • blondie
    blondie

    First, what are you afraid of...losing your parents good will? What will it take for you to get it back? Do you want to do that? If not,

    Do you have a job? Does it pay enough for you to pay your way with your boyfriend? Is there someone else you can live with? Do you have to have a car? Are there other alternative transportation?

    I had a plan when I was 17 how I was going to get a job, support myself, make a home for me and my abused siblings. I got a good government job, figured how to take the bus, saved my money and got a cheap used car, moved in with a couple of girls I met through a friend at work, made a haven for my siblings.

    I hope you had plans to eventually be independent of your parents.

    First you have to decide if you want to leave or if you can convince your parents to let you stay.......if you want to pay the price.

    Otherwise, be glad you have a boyfriend that seems to be stable financially and is willing to take you in.

    Blondie (on my own for 20 years before I married)

  • OpenFireGlass
    OpenFireGlass

    Oh, Yeah... and I didn't have the internet for support at that time either... lucky you..

  • parakeet
    parakeet

    You poor kid! It's decision-time for you--will you stay under your parents' protection (and their rules) or take the leap? Only you can decide whether you're ready. Your fears are justified--it's not easy in the real world; there are no guarantees that everything's going to work out OK. On the other hand, you have a good job, a sympathetic bf, more than many have when they start out on their own. And if not today, then someday, you will have to decide to be the grown-up in your life. Best of luck to you!

  • Lady Lee
    Lady Lee

    Blondie had some really good questions for you to consider

    For me, I would ask, is the stress of living with your parents and giving the semblance of WT obedience worth the strain it puts on you.

    Like many people you are most likely stronger than you think. People can and do survive anything.

    Mind you if you tell your parents you are moving in with a guy they might back down real fast

    But ultimately, it's time to be in charge of your life without all the attached strings your parents want over you.

    Go for it.

  • rebel8
    rebel8

    Whoa.....isn't this kinda sudden? You tell one lie and you're thrown out of the house? I don't get it.

    Doing something despite being afraid of it can be exhilirating and empowering. Good luck with whatever you choose!

    (I won't bore you with my story 'cause it's a repeat of what everyone else said. I made it too! Nowadays I fear dependence upon others much more than independence. I've found I'm a lot more dependable than others.)

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