solo- sorry, i didn`t mean it to come across like that, i meant if you are happy without kids, some people are, and fair play to them. I never intended to have any, but they just came along, but was happy that i had them!
Womens Right`s are they Wrong?
by dido 87 Replies latest jw friends
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jaguarbass
Different strokes for different folks. Here in Amerika it takes two incomes to survive anyways.
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dido
jaguarbass- can i ask what sort of standard of living are you talking about, how many cars, do they eat out a lot, is a lot of money spent on luxuries that people don`t need, but work for, to the detriment of the kids?
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Insomniac
Personally, I've never seen the appeal of babies. They scream, they vomit, they crap in their pants so some adult has to clean them up. Then you have to buy them clothes, carseats, toys, medical care, orthodonture, corrective lenses, and pretty much everything else you can imagine, for nearly two decades. Through much of this time, the kid will need constant supervision, or else it's liable to wander into oncoming traffic or eat the poison you set for rats, because kids have poorly developed survival skills. Then, you get the fun of paying for its college, possibly its wedding, helping with a down payment for a house if need be, because that's what parents do. If you've done your job well, and the kid still likes you when you're old, you get the ultimate reward: your kids will choose a really nice nursing home for you to die in. All things considered, I'm glad my man and I have chosen not to procreate, and that, because of women's rights, I'm able to earn just as much money as any man. My man and I both work, and we strive to earn more money than we actually need to get by. Then, we take all that excess money and selfishly spend it on ourselves. We don't bother to put any aside for our offspring- it's all for us. Being childless and having an education and a career are fun, and now that I think about it, I can clearly see why all the housewives act so judgemental towards us: because they're jealous.
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dido
Insomniac- what is there to be jealous of people that are selfish? Fair enough you can indulge in everything, but there comes a day when that get`s boring, when you`ve done everything, got everything. There is nothing that can place the feeling of holding new life in your arms, that you can watch grow, smile, walk, and who you can love, and who can love you back. I think you are just focussing on the negative things, there are lots of positive ones. Who will come and visit you when you get old? think about it?
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Mysterious
Personally I would rather have a career than a family and I'm glad I have the opportunity to do so.
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looking_glass
I agree w/ what Mary wrote. Well written Mary!
As for me and my household (hee, hee ... just some JW humor there!) it consists of me. Why, because I don't want to be married. Doesn't mean I was never ask and in some cases even said yes, but realized before the day came that it was not really me. I love kids, but other peoples' kids. The kinds that I can play with, fill full of sugar and even watch for a week-end when the parents go off to celebrate an anniversary. But then I get to go home. To peace and quiet. To things being the way I want them to be. I get a lot of fulfillment in my work and volunteering.
As for women's rights. Rights cannot be legislated nor governed. They have to be w/i each person so as to apply them in their own lives and way of living. That being said, if women were not allowed to be free by law, they would still be dominated by men. Women still to this day are dominated by men. A large group of mainly white guys, who sit in the round and make decisions based on their own experiences because they cannot see outside themselves. At least in the US that is. Had women not been allowed to become independent and have a voice, we would be lesser humans then they make us now. I work in an industry that does not respect me. I want to be treated equal, not just in comparison to men, but in general. I don't want special treatment, I want equal treatment. We are a society of extremes. I would just like to see people showing eachother tolerance, acceptance and common courtesy. But those are things that cannot be legislated or governed. Those are things that have to come from w/i.
The opening thread is making generalizations that are unfair and narrow-minded. And as a woman who is past 35, who does not have children and who is not married and has no desire for either, I think you have done your fellow gender a disservice by painting the picture in black or white terms which remind me of the religion we all trying to steer away from.
To all woman, I saw, know yourself first. Once you find out what you love and what your heart's desire is, you will be happy and in turn bring happiness to all around you. You should be proud of everything you have accomplished regardless of if the world in general feels it is worthwhile, because you have discovered you and you are your own person.
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Insomniac
Dido- I have nephews and nieces, so I've had ample opportunity to hold babies and watch them do cute things. You're right, at times children are quite adorable. I like to be around them at these moments, but then they always end it by vomiting on something. Then I hand them back to their mothers and take a moment to feel really good about having been responsible about my sexuality and having lived 38 years without getting knocked up. I thank the deity that I have the same rights as any man, and I thank Margaret Sanger that I have control over whether or not I bring another person into this overcrowded world. Because of equal earning power and an absence of children, my partner and I can have breakable pieces of art in our home without fearing they'll be broken. We have the luxury of time, so we can spend plenty of time hanging out in coffeehouses with our friends. We can afford to take vacations, we can choose to eat in restaurants that don't have a play area for children, but do have a great wine list. Best of all, we can express our love to each other in whatever manner we choose, as loud as we like, in any room of the house we wish, at whatever time of the day we want to. I gather that people with kids don't have so much personal freedom, and I feel badly for them. Btw, you asked me who'll come and visit us when we're old. In addition to our loyal hired help (whom I envision hiring one of these days)I'm assuming it'll be my nephews and nieces. See, the great thing about being an auntie with no kids of her own, is that I can have a very warm and loving relationship with them, but I never have to discipline them or clean up after them; I'm just a cool adult who does fun stuff with them. So, they're pretty danged fond of me now, and I don't expect that to change as we age.
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restrangled
There was a great book written in the late 70's or early 80's entitled "The Women's Room" It was about women's rights..... I have read it probably 10 times in my life, and loaned out numerous copies.
To me, women's rights mean respect for what we do, and equal pay if we are working. It also means we are no ones possession or of lesser value in any situation, including involvement in patriarchal religion which the Society is guilty of big time along with many others.
Have some gone over board, yes. Does this take away from the original principle that we are equal humans. NO.
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acsot
Once you find out what you love and what your heart's desire is, you will be happy and in turn bring happiness to all around you. You should be proud of everything you have accomplished regardless of if the world in general feels it is worthwhile, because you have discovered you and you are your own person.
looking_glass: well said!