My JW Mothers' Words Of "Love"

by Ranchette 60 Replies latest jw friends

  • lisaBObeesa
    lisaBObeesa

    Dear Mom,

    So let me get this straight: You think that since I am not a JW I am going to turn you into the authorities durring the Big A?

    And you think that because I am not a JW, my son is going to die in a war?

    And you think the Bible fortells the end of the world in our lifetime?

    And you think you are stating "FACT", not trying to be mean?

    Please tell me where the "facts" are because I don't see any. Just a bunch of guesses. Maybe you should look up the word "fact" in the dictionary. And since you don't have any "FACTS" in this letter, I am left to conclude that despite what you say, this letter WAS intended to hurt me and WAS mean.

    Love,
    me.

  • Moxy
    Moxy

    thx for sharing. i feel for you. assure her of your unconditional love, is my advice.

    mox

  • thewiz
    thewiz

    That is sad. It's no wonder why some of us are so hardened.

    My Dad used to say, maybe he still does, "...when you (taking about us, his family) are all dead at Armageddon, and I'm by myself...I don't think I will be able to handle being alone." And a family favorite, "I'll go down praising Jehovah." -We were wondering why GOD would be destroying a man so righteously disposed. If he were so righteous he wouldn't be going down.

    I do beleive the truth is out there (in the bible), I just don't think the WTBS has the sole license. GOD can use who he wants, when he wants. He even uses Satan.

    Seeker when something like this WTC thing happens doesn't it
    remind you the things that are important to you? To tell someone you love them more often. Think about times when someone had soemthing good to say, but instead took a jab. Next thing you now that person is gone. We've seen it played out many times.

    My aunt & uncle lost several children many years ago, I am willing to bet that they think over and over again how they wished the last words they said to their children were, "I love you. You'll always have a home here."

    It's many of these things in life we take for granted.

    It's the same with the JWs. This horrible thing has reminded them about what is really important to them. They may have become complacent. People in general do that. They/We forget.

    Now I'll get preachy...

    Jesus, the Apostle Paul, and all the disciples always had the nearness of GOD's kingdom in mind, and yet, after holy spirit arrived upon them knew it wasn't coming the next day/week/month/year/decade/century/millenia.

    Imagine the disappointment the Jews got when Jesus didn't come along and kick the Romans out, like they thought was going to happen. That is one of the biggests reasons they rejected him. His disciples were further disappointed when they asked Jesus about his kingdom. Yet later they preached about it's coming nearness.

    Do I feel that an end is coming? If I believe in the bible I have to. Did people die in the flood of Noah's day? Doesn't every christian religion believe in the eschatology of the bible?

    Do I think this will bring the end? No. Do I believe this is another 66 C.E. Defintely. It is simply a reminder, a wake up call. Jesus said when you see the city surronded with pointed stakes flee to the mountains. There is secular historical proof that this did happen in 66 C.E. under general Titus, for unkonwn reasons he withdrew. People could then make good their escape.

    Is this something that people just want to put out of their minds and just not think about? Or do many just not believe it anymore?

  • Stealth
    Stealth

    Thanks for sharing Ranchette.

    It is letters like these that can help us all see the MO of many JW mothers. This sounds exactly like a letter that my mother would have written to me. My mother could have made a fortune from writing a book on how to emotionaly black mail your children.

    Since the WT removes any possiblity of a parent to defend their faith with the sword of the word because they are not allowed to talk to even their children about spiritual matters. They then have to resort to this type of emotional crap to try and get you back.

    When I left the org for a few years at age 18, I thought that I was going to put my mother in her grave. She was quite effective at this kind of stuff. And she would still be doing it today if she had not died. As much as I loved her, I can't say I miss for one moment not having to talk with her, because she would always pull the same guilt and fear crap. And if your mother is anything like mine was, you could get 12 people in a room to confront her on her manipulation tactics and she would never admit or see it.

    I agree with Moxy: assure her of your unconditional love. knowing that she also is being spiritualy held captive by the WT org.

    Keep you chin up! ((your family))

  • dins
    dins

    Ranchette,

    Sorry that you had to receive such a stinging letter. I have had them through the years, and have had guilt heaped on me in regards to my son.

    The Society must be saying the same thing to all. Yesterday my grandmother said that the terrorism thing was going to get "really bad" and then it would "get solved", I presume referring to the Peace and Security thing.

    As a former post so rightly said, they have all their bases covered. Don't let the comments get to you. It's all the JWs know, and unfortunately they are so blinded to reality.

    Good luck

    Diana

  • Unclepenn1
    Unclepenn1

    It's a shame that the Word of God is twisted to destroy families for not trusting an org that is from the devil.

    Penn

    Mohammed- 'My teachings lead to the attainment of truth'
    Buddha- 'The truth has been revealed to me'
    Jesus- 'I am the truth'

  • Eamajination
    Eamajination

    Ranchette:
    It amazes me how ungrateful some can express/act. Under the unbrella of LOVE!!!! Continue to express your love for your Mom but perhaps help her, gently, to remember that it took many black bags coming home to buy the freedoms the JW/WTBTS enjoys.
    Gratitude for the freedom to exercise religious beliefs should be felt by ALL. It is those very freedoms purchased with someones childrens' blood that the WTBTS continues to operate from it's headquarters here in the USA and that is why they stay here.
    None of us want our children in a black bag, the family of those at the WTC didn't wish to see theirs' in a black bag either.
    Oh my, what a tangled web they weave.
    Pray for strength, understanding and love as we will pray for you

  • Ranchette
    Ranchette

    I want to thank every one for their kind words.I have gotten about one letter a month since I quit, and each one is hard to deal with.After the first ones I tried to reason with her.I quickly found out how futile that is when your dealing with a master manipulater,emotional blackmail expert,cult member! These letters hurt. It's pretty bad when I know how I'm going to be treated but still want to hear from her anyway.
    Several of you have advised me to reasure her of my love.I guess that is good advice because after the hurt thats the only thing I can do that wont make things worse.
    I do think of funny crazy things I could do to lighten things up.A good sense of humor is always helpful.But they wouldn't help either in the long run but are fun to think about anwway.
    Ranchette

  • WhatNow
    WhatNow

    Yep! Sounds like my mom too. No such thing as 'unconditional love' from her. It's all based on whether or not I'm in the truth. I HAVE a son (20 yrs) old enough to be drafted. He left the truth before I did, so I guess he can't 'blame' me for THAT one...just the other two I have at home.

  • patio34
    patio34

    Hi Ranchette,

    What a hurtful letter to receive. How to assimilate it and not let it hurt you for too long? Good question. Some excellent suggestions have appeared.

    The saying "To understand all is to forgive all" came to mind. In the sense that if her motives are understood, her tactless cruel words can be absorbed better.

    In her mind (thanks to the WTBS), you're in a deadly position and anything is warranted to "save" you.

    That brings to mind another quip: there's no reasoning with logic like that.

    It's hard to deal with people who are in such a fantasy world. Good luck.

    Pat

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