My JW Mothers' Words Of "Love"

by Ranchette 60 Replies latest jw friends

  • blondie
    blondie

    It's amazing what people will do and say to each other under the guise of "love." Ranchette, think carefully about when you were going to the KH; did your mother manipulate you this way then?

    I'd be willing to say she did. I'm not so sure that JWs teach people to be manipulators or if manipulators are drawn to them.

    Your mother said these things because she knew they would hurt...it's hard to believe she just started using these tactics...I'm sure in spite of what the she knows the Bible says, she probably hurt you this way when you were going to the KH.

    If God's love were conditional, how could he love any of us imperfect humans. There is nothing we can DO to deserve God's love that's why it is called "undeserved kindness."

    (I'll stop now, it's a little uncomfortable getting so personal, but you sound like a loving person who needs a hand up after Mom has kicked you)

  • ARoarer
    ARoarer

    Hi Ranchette,
    When I came home today I heard the news from my husband about the letter from your mom. The harsh words she wrote to you were so like the letters I have been recieving from "friends" who have the WT brand of "love". Really, they are more literally like death threats. Her lanquage to you was so passive agressively abusive, and manipulative, and even emotionally perpetrative. Be glad that you have freed your son from the type of "killing" the Watchtower teaches when it comes to those of us who want to escape from it. The "body bag" illustration was not the words of a grandmother who loves her grandchild in a natural way, and her hits on you and your husband were not the way a mother loves her adult children in natural way. The WT's twisted interpretations have taught the members to have "no natural affection" for one another nor their own children and family members. The teaching that all outside are worthy of destruction at the hands of THEIR GOD is no different then the fundamentalist terrorist Bin Laden. Today I was thinking that all my former friends are basically saying the same thing your mom is, and that they don't fight in wars because they have beaten their swords into plowshears already. But you can bet your butt that when those aircraft carriers fly over (I live near McGuire Airforce Base) they must be glad that protection is given to them so that not more terrorist planes can dive into thier childrens schools. They are enjoying the protection of the superior authorities that God has appointed to be a minister of vengeance against those doing wrong. JW's pride themselves by not lifting up sword against fellow believers all around the world. Well Christians all around the world may not all be law abiding citizens. If a Christian kills another Christian, or a Jew kills another Jew, or if a Catholic, kills another Catholic, and even a JW kills another JW, or for that matter blows up a building and kills countless other people, men, women, and children, then THE SUPERIOR AUTHORITEIES which stand in their relative positions as God's means of justice against those doing wrong, are divinely appointed to punish the criminal or criminals. The WT is twisting scripture. The act at the World Trade Center, was immoral, criminal, unjust, unChristian, unIslam and unEvery other peace loving, Godly way of thinking and worshipping. Who are the JW's to dare say that the prayers going up to God by the Presidant, and all Americans, asking him for help, direction, and wisdom in fighting this enemy tha attacked us in such an unGodly, even demonic way, who is WT to say that God won't use the nations to punish this murderous Terrorist and those who harbor him. Just like the WT harbors pedophiles, and will be judged by the superior authorities for criminal behavior. Your mother forgets that is how God has always operated according to the Bible. Yes, hug your little son and be glad you are a protective good mother breaking the cycle of religious abuse. Let her know you do love her but set your boundary with her and let her know you will not allow her to emotionally black mail you with threats of doom to you and your children, and therefore will no longer accept mail from her. If she wants to talk to you in person, you would love to talk with her but not over her religious view. If she refuses to do that than she is the one who has no natural affection, not you. You might also remind her that her fear of you turning her in is something that is inculcated into JW's, and that THEY are the ones who are more likely to deliver each other up since that is what comes naturally to them which is so unnatural. Stay strong and keep your chin up Ranchette, you are doing fine. If Armeggedon were to come tomorrow, it would be as Jesus said, a totally individual thing. How we treat one another, and all humanity the best way we can, in whatever country we are in, and under any circustance we are in is going to be how we are going to stand before our Maker. Human kindness and compassion for one another is all we should be doing on our journey in this life, because unlike the JW's living their life waiting not to die is living a selfish life. It is very humbling to accect that someday we all will die and end up in a "body bag". Allow yourself to live each day to the fullest enjoying what the Creator meant you to enjoy while being the best with the abilities you were born with, practicing good will towards All people. Take Care Ranchette.

  • BlackMan4Life
    BlackMan4Life

    I feel you Ranch, really I do. My mother is just as 'loving' but minus the letters. I work right next to the WTC and she hasn't call me yet to see how I'm doing. At first it didn't bother me, but when everybody else, from my old job workmates to old friends (all 'Worldly) called me, it dawn on me that she didn't inquire. If the WTC event shows me anything it's that the 'Worldly' people are the ones with a better brand of love. It also reminds me of PLH post about her trip to the meeting when the CO spoke about 'taking care of your aging mother only if you HAVE to. In any event, as an above post said 'they really feel like they are doing the right thing.' Which only makes you see how 'cultish' and evil the BORG is.

    As Tupac said "Keep your head up."
    Peace My Sister - Larry :)

  • Ranchette
    Ranchette

    Blondie,
    I love your handle,Blondie was one of my favorite singers when I was a teenager.

    Your right,I delt with this abuse my whole life!
    Oh the stories I could tell you.
    In another thread I called her a master manipulater and emotional blackmail expert.
    Yes, I love her but sometimes I wonder, why? I don't have the answer.I just do,no matter what she pulls.
    Ranchette

  • Tatiana
    Tatiana

    OMG, Ranchette!!!!!! We are sisters!!!!!! Your mother HAS to be my mother!!! That lying witch never told me she had another child!!!!LOL

    April

    "Love never dies." Voivodul Vlad Draculea (from Bram Stoker's Dracula-1992)

  • Ranchette
    Ranchette

    Blackman,
    I feel for you too! Any normal mother would check on her son in a situation like this no matter how bad family relations are, or your standing in the org. I’ve been learning the same lessons about “worldly people.” They are free to show genuine love. I see a huge difference in real love and the conditional love from the organization.

    Arorer,
    Thank you for your kind words.
    I’ve been thinking the same thing about the Talaban and Jws being equally impossible to reason with because they are both cults. One more physically dangerous than the other but both hold members in bondage mentally and emotionally.

    Ranchette

  • JT
    JT

    your moms says:

    I can see the possibility of the notable cry of Pease and Security,
    ########

    O yes since 1986 THE INTERNATIONAL YEAR OF PEACE- YEA RIGHT

    ########

    There is no turning back the wheels that are in motion

    #######The Wheels are in Motion???????? yea right that 1974 chevy pickup truck ( you know the one --the one they use to say WOULD TAKE ME TO ARMEGEDDON) has been sitting on blocks in the backyard for almost 30yrs now- it ain't going nowhere
    ######

    And I for one am so glad to have the truth and know what the future really holds.

    ##### NOW NOTICE THE SURENESS OF THE ABOVE STATEMENT "I know what the future holds" but then notice the FOOTNOTE

    #####

    I do foresee "if the end comes in our lifetimes"

    #######

    Now didn't they just up till a few years ago you use to say IN OUR LIFE TIME yea right

    ######

    which I know you reject evidently like other truths of Gods word

    ######

    was the GENERATION DOGMA one of those TRUTHS OF GOD'S WORD
    just asking

    By that time you’ll be so far removed from natural affection that when pressure is put on you, you won’t give it a second thought and certainly since (your husband) has been terribly hurt over and over by his parents, he probably wouldn’t have any qualms of doing so. I know you don’t believe this will ever happen in your case.

    NIce guilt line-- you and your hubby will reject me and turn me in , etc- when in fact it will be YOU AND YOUR HUBBY who will take care of her Old A$$ , since her loving sisters and bro will not have time to even stop by since they can't count any time

    how sad indeed

    #########

    I love you and my grandchildren dearly,
    Love,
    Mom
    ########
    Yep that wonderful CONDITIONAL LOVE

    ##########

    i HOPE THAT i didn't come over been mean, but merely to point out that your dear mom has no idea what her future is, but you do and it is as follows

    1. WT will require her to keep selling book, attending sales meetings and feeling guilty for failing in any area they have prescribed as the will of god

    while you on the other hand will work to build a solid home and a few dollars stuck away for later years will be called on to care for her when she is USELESS TO WT

    how sad AND For MANy OF US including my wife and i we too realize that when my mother in law is old and sick it will more than likely be us who will care for her when no one else will

    HOW SAD

    jAMES

  • Farkel
    Farkel

    Ranchette,

    You're mom and my mom are no doubt spiritual soul-mates. Different people same words.

    : I’m stating fact, not trying to be mean [t].

    What fact? I didn't seen any facts. Did you see any facts?

    Farkel

  • Ranchette
    Ranchette

    Farkle,
    That's the question I kept asking,What facts?

    Did you notice that she's now a prophetess too?
    She said "I foresee"......

    Ranchette

  • AuSet
    AuSet

    (((Ranchette)))

    I, like many others here, have a mother very similar to yours...I had lunch with her today, and she informed me that my brother called to say he's coming back into the truth (after having been out for 10+ years!) Needless to say, I nearly had to make a run for the bathroom, I couldn't eat another bite...she then proceeded into trying to "scare" me by telling me how my brother said "I just hope I'm coming back in time, before "A", all this about the WTC is scaring me so much, I'm worried about my wife and child..." and then stared at ME like I should be doing the same thing.

    Ranchette, its family members like these whom we must love unconditionally, BUT also we must guard ourselves very carefully from them. This may mean cutting off emotional ties...this is very hard to do, but it may prevent you from continuously getting harmed by your mother's "loving" words she sends you once a month. I love my Mother, but she no longer has the power to hurt me with her words, because I've taken that away from her.

    JT: Hahaha! This one really had me rolling on the floor...I believe Dad has one of these sitting on the lawn as I type this! :)

    There is no turning back the wheels that are in motion

    #######The Wheels are in Motion???????? yea right that 1974 chevy pickup truck ( you know the one --the one they use to say WOULD TAKE ME TO ARMEGEDDON) has been sitting on blocks in the backyard for almost 30yrs now- it ain't going nowhere

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