This whole nice guy/jerk dichotomy is overblown and false. A woman with enough sense in her head will go for neither, from my experience. She would go for the assertive guy. The guy that doesn't go out and seek trouble, but who will not back down when he sees trouble.
She will appreciate a guy that has a backbone but doesn't go about beating people with that backbone. For instance, don't pay for her dinner until you guys are serious, and don't expect her to pay for your dinner.
If she tries to zing you on certain faults (Like your lack of income or the humbleness of your car, etc) don't get huffy and defensive. Come back with something witty, and say it in a confident manner.
For example, I don't drive, and I get mocked about it constantly by the women who I tend to date (Affluent suburban women). However, I ride it off by saying "Hey, it's much cheaper to ride than to go to the health club and I don't have to use other people's sweaty gym equipment."
If you get defensive about the fault, then the woman sees you as being emotionally weak and she will never respect you.
Also, don't try to smother her. Let her come to you, not the other way around. You can't make people do what they don't want to do.
Again, that's at least if she has sense. If she doesn't have sense, she would go for the abusive jerk and if you try to be the abusive jerk type, you deserve the STD's and emotional baggage these gluttons for punishment carry.
Sane women don't like being abused. If you call a woman "fat", even in a joke, she will get highly offended. If she likes being talked down to and verbally abused, then she will abuse you. If you're looking for a quick lay from these types that enjoy verbal abuse, go ahead, more power to you. However, don't cry if you find out you have herpes.
Also finally remember, WOMEN ARE PEOPLE TOO! BECAUSE THEY'RE ANATOMICALLY DIFFERENT FROM YOU DOES NOT MEAN THEY'RE DIFFERENT CREATURES! Think if you were around a smothering and insecure but "nice" girl. Unless you're desperate, (And if you are, you probably have an unresolved mental issue) you would run the other way. Don't expect not to be the same because you're "nice" and you deserve it because you're "nice".