the R word

BlackSwan of Memphis

Ok people we need to talk.

If you put up on this forum the N word, the D word, the C word.....I don't even want to spell them out because I am not going to offend people I care about. If you need to know send me a pm.

You know the words that trigger the gut reactions.

The kick in the stomach.

Etc

You need to add a word to that list:

RETARD.

When you use that word to describe a person or yourself in a negative way you are being incredibly rude to people like my daughter and her friends.

When you make the joke about the short bus you are being an ass and not only will I NOT read your posts anymore I will ignore the hell out of you if I find that you take delight in that word.

Wanna get down on me for asking you to censor your mouths a bit?

Fine. Don't care, I ain't backing down on this.

We would be pissed off, incensed with people who came on our board and used the derogatory words above. Wouldn't we?

Well I am pissed off that people can throw around the R word without a care in the world.

Get some empathy.

I am not Mad at any one person, I am finding that people in general don't "get it" and am here to inform you that you need to.

What makes a word offensive? If you say my momma is a crack ho. Would that bother me? No, its not true, why should it bother me. If it were true, someone saying it still would not bother me... I'd be like "Well ya you're right, so what"

Why should any word be offensive. Someone using a certain word might show themself to be a bigot. So what? Did that hurt the called or the caller.

IP_SEC

Further, the word RETARD is really designed to be offensive. Yes? But a word cannot be offensive, loses all power, if no one is offended by it.

IP_SEC

Fine....then we can use the rest of them words too.

Yes, I think now you are understanding the way it should be. Call me a cracker all day long. You arent offending me, just making yourself (i mean you in the plural) look like a fool. If I call a black person a nigger, Im not hurting them, just showing my own ignorance.

BlackSwan of Memphis

but it isn't that way....

especially in the case of kids on the short bus who get treated like retards and are made to feel like retards and less then a person.

Tell them what you said.

I invite you to a Special Olympics in your area and use the word Retard.

When the people around you look at you like you are the most insensitive person in the world...explain it to them.

LongHairGal

I agree with you. Somebody I care about very much is the "R" word or, "Developmently Disabled". My mother never forgave an uncle who made fun of this person. So, I should be more sensitive than most. Sometimes we hear things uttered around us and then we let it slip out even if there is no real malice intended on our part.

I realize we live in a crass world where people make fun of things that aren't funny. You daily hear jokes about fat people, etc. I am not attacking any particular poster, but sometimes people pick up bad habits. The problem is that our world is being politically corrected to death. So, this just adds one more oops to the list.

LHG

IP_SEC

I do not use the word retard.

Not because I think it is wrong or offensive but because I dont want to look like an ignorant fool.

Paralipomenon

While I agree with BSOM's point, I have to point out that I have never been offended by the term cracker, nor have I ever met a Caucasian that has been. It kinda makes me giggle.

mrsjones5

Hm I guess I missed the other threads (well some of them anyway) where that word was used but I know I used it recently (can't remember if I used it about myself or...I need to look at that post again).

Yeah I can see why you would be sensitive about that word, I have a younger brother Daivd (he's 37 now) who is mentally and physically handicapped. David was in a swimming pool accident when he was almost 5 years old. He drowned but was saved only to have brain damage which affects his speech, left him unable to walk, and with the mind of a child. Growing up my sister Suzie, my brother Wes, and I were very protective of David. Didn't like the way people would stare at him, can't control that but we would stare back and usually make some remake about how rude that person was.

But for some reason I'm not that sensitive about the word retard, though I rarely use it. Now if someone dared to use that word to describe my child (who has autistic tendencies and sensory issues which can manifest into some different behaviors) then I would have a problem.

So I guess what I'm trying to say is I don't care if that word is used as long as it is not used as a put down towards anyone (self putdowns are different), I don't consider it to be on the same level as N or C or MF or even B. But I will respectfully try not to use that word in the future.

Josie

AWAKE&WATCHING

((((()))))) HUGS AND KISSES TO YOU (((((()))))) Thank you for this topic.

I was just sitting here trying to figure out how to not be offensive while pointing out that I was offended.

I have never been worried about the PC way to say "retarded". Doesn't matter to me if you use that word or "developmentally delayed" or "mentally challenged".

As the mother of such a child I can tell you that the "spirit" in which the word is used matters more than the actual term.

I find it extremely hurtful to make fun of helpless people that can't defend themselves.

The fact that I've only recently discovered that the paradise is a lot of hooey hasn't helped. My son lived until he was 23. He never talked or walked without a walker. He ate food the consistency of baby food and wore diapers his whole life.

He was a happy, smiling, loving kid with an infectious laugh. And yes, he rode a short bus.

the R word

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