the R word (page 6)

unique1

Actually I feel the same way as the blonde at the register. I am a really smart gal and it always catches people off guard. I dye my hair red constantly just because I am so tired of being treated like an idiot. The only good side of that, is that I am a complete and total clutz. My husband has started calling them (Teri Moments) as in did you just do something clutzy that Teri Hatchers character would do on Desperate Houswives? At least then I can smile and say something like "Guess the blonde roots just kicked in." and get a laugh.

Open mind

I've picked up this flavor from some posts:

This is too much "censorship" or restriction of freedom. The "politically correct" police will soon be running the joint.

I could join in on that line of thinking as well. I could try to see if I can find the exact razor's edge between exercising my own freedoms and being sensitive to the concerns of others.

But at the end of the day, for me at least, it comes down to this. There are a gazillion web sites out there where you can flame and fight and be rude 'til the cows come home. This place is special. I'm willing to reign in my flappy tongue a little in the interests of maintaining a diverse "community" here at JWD. I'm not saying anyone else needs to, but, I'm adding "retard" to the list of words I don't toss around in casual, just poking fun type, conversations.

That and $2.00 (where I live) will get you a pretty good cuppa joe.

Open Mind

restrangled

Thanks for the further replies. Mary I just don't agree with you. This is going to have to be an area where we agree to disagree and go two different directions.

That's very kind of you, because where I'm sitting...she first says that for you to compare it to the n word is ridiculous, then a post or two later she compares it to saying Merry Xmas. I guess you get to take the heat for the PC movement.

Outlaw: Are you saying that I am holding up my daughter as a target?

Yes. Then he used the term and topped it off with...I have a friend who is....and nobody better mess with him. The Archie Bunker defense.

See here is the deal....a mentally retarded kid and his mom are basically defenseless. Now if you were Charles Barkley standing in front of Outlaw, he would porbobably say "Yes sir, Mr. Barkley it was wrong of me to use that word and I apologize." But here on an anonymous forum, you don't have to show empathy, kindness or consideration if you don't want to.....or courage for that matter.

R's hubby

BlackSwan of Memphis

outlaw: well honestly I wasn't sure...which is why I just asked. I didn't know how to take it. Similar to Mary *whose posts I've often enjoyed...I am trying not to assume too much. I did that earlier on the thread and felt like daft (I'm beginning to like this word) I hope you enjoy the link, as a reminder it is Not in regards to the general public it is in regards to Special Olympics. I appreciate your respect and honesty

Ok I think what perhaps needs to be cleared up on my part:

I am Not thinking that when a person uses the word R or whatever that they are intentionally seeking to devalue or hurt a person who suffers from that condition. So far, not you (Outlaw) or mary or anyone here has shown me that they are that cold or are mean enough to use the word to devalue a person with a medical condition.

I think that Emo put it pretty well:

The way I see this is that if you wouldn't call someone with special needs that name to their face, then why use it as a derogatory term toward anyone else?
By using it as an insult, you are 'devaluing'/disrespecting (damn I can't think of any right words tonight!) the medical condition and by association, those who have it - which could one day include you. Might not be so cool or funny then hmm?
Just my 2p. Ready for incoming flak!

Unique: I feel like a jerk, after talking with this girl, reading Mary's posts and now yours for ever repeating a blonde joke. It's really no different then what I am asking of others. I offer my apologies And my thanks to you blondes for giving my "karma" a kick in the arse. Reminding me of that what I am asking of others is what I myself need to be careful of doing. hope that makes sense

OUTLAW

Restrangled.."Archie Bunker Defense"..LOL!!..I love it..OK.."Target" was a bad example of the idea I was trying to get across.....Black Swan,I apologise to you,for using the word target...OUTLAW

BlackSwan of Memphis

Rs hubby:

I suppose really, i am so tired today. Little sleep last night plus looking up medicaid for MI has left me thinking....I give up.

John Doe

All right folks. No one should make any jokes whatsoever, because laughing is disrespecting the millions of people who suffer from having no sense of humor. Just imagine the heart wrenching agony of never smiling, multiply that by 10^3 and you'll know what it's like to live humorlessly. People who make jokes are callous and less than human. I'm not going to try and change your minds, but I will make it known that I take great offense to joke makers. All humor is based on misfortune and pain that someone suffers from, and laughing is a sign of the devil.

Remember in the 2000 election where people were making fun of Gore for being stiff and lacking a sense of humor? How do you think those jokes made that poor retard, 'er, I mean guy feel?

BlackSwan of Memphis

Doe, I thought that we were making fun of that other guy.........

restrangled

BSofM don't sweat it. By and large the population is made up of wussies. The same people who are crackin on you would crumble in a minute if the roles were reversed. The people who don't like to give up the weak as a target are among themselves the weakest of the bunch. You show tremendous strength and resolve. Direct that toward your child and never expend energy on those who don't have a clue as to what real strength is.

R's hubby

BlackSwan of Memphis

r's hubby...thanks.

Ya know being a parent is hard. Being a parent of a kid w/ challenges is tougher.

I don't know sometimes what to say to people. On one hand we don't want our kids to be treated different, on the other hand, dang, we want to know that the people we put in their lives are compassionate and empathetic (sp). We don't want to coddle any of our kids, but we do want to protect them.

As Open Mind said, I DO see the poing about political correctness....and I DO see John Doe's oddly made point ....

On both sides finding the place to draw the line is not easy. Where I want it drawn is drastically different then the next person's.

Do I enclose my family in a circle of friends who think like us, thereby am I creating and fostering the same mental environment that I sought to escape? Do I knock off people like Mary and Outlaw just because they differ in this one area?

On the hardest of days I sit and think, hell yeah. But ya know.....we can't always agree on everything. We can't always think alike. I WANT people to understand WHY it hurts when they use the word RETARD to describe the President (I didn't vote for by the way) of the USA. Why they are willing to put this man who (imho) has no problem missiling civlians in a foreign country killing innocent people (let's not get started). That they are putting this man on the same mental level as some of the most loving, compassionate people I have ever met.

It hurts.

It just does.

And r's hubby....perhaps I am just trying and have tried way too damn hard to just say in the most simplest of terms when you do that, you the people that I have at times considered the only friends I have had since leaving the JW's, it hurts, it hurts, it hurts.

But I suppose I figure I would be reminded "don't get too emotional".

r is a lucky lady

the R word

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