Is it POOR PARENTING to raise a child into a religious faith?

by nicolaou 73 Replies latest social family

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  nicolaou

  Or, by the same token, to raise a child to be atheist? Surely we should teach our children how to think, not what to think. Equip them with the mental tools they need to be able to work things out for themselves. Teach them that skepticism and doubt are valuable assets that drive the curious to look for answers.

  Of course we all pass on the conclusions we've reached for ourselves, it's only human, but how much better to see our children develop the skills of reason and critical thought. None of this should diminish their sense of awe and wonder at the Universe around them, rather a glimpse at how things really are would surely raise their appreciation as well as their consciousness.

  Nic'
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  truthsetsonefree

  I believe very strongly in teaching HOW to think as Nic mentions. Done properly the child can later choose what is in THEIR best interests. Isaac
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  Scully

  we should teach our children how to think, not what to think.

  This is the crux of the matter, imo.

  Religions tell (instead of teach) people what to think.

  The only belief system that I have encountered that encourages independent thought and promotes the idea that evidence should be required as the basis for belief is secularism / atheism.

  As to your question about whether it is poor parenting or not, I can't say for certain one way or the other. My own experience growing up in the JWs, my parents did their best with what knowledge they had at the time. In many respects, they did teach us to question and not take everything at face value and to require evidence, with respect to everything but the JW belief system. The belief system was a no-fly zone - and I think for many religious people that's exactly how it is.

  I know you've read Dawkins' The God Delusion, and he addresses that issue as well, that far too many religious people have erected this imaginary wall around religious belief as being impervious to questioning. The scientist can go about his work, requiring evidence for everything he or she is researching, and following the scientific method of arriving at conclusions, and then on Sunday he or she can sit in a church pew and suspend all reasoning, all questioning, all manner of requiring evidence when it comes to religion. Why is that??
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  nicolaou

  The scientist can go about his work, requiring evidence for everything he or she is researching, and following the scientific method of arriving at conclusions, and then on Sunday he or she can sit in a church pew and suspend all reasoning, all questioning, all manner of requiring evidence when it comes to religion. Why is that??

  Perhaps they aren't suspending their reasoning at all, could it just be that they are putting in the token effort required to maintain social networks, friendships, please the spouse etc? We're all familiar with the slow fade away from dubdom but perhaps a scientist has to fade ever so slightly in to institutions he has no intellectual attachment to for very similar reasons.

  Dunno, just typing as I'm thinking

  As for the poor parenting thing. I ask because I've had conversations in this vein with my Mother. She's a great Mum and I have to be careful not to hurt her feelings when we speak but I've asked her if she would raise us the same way again having gained the experience the past 40 years have given her.

  For example, no associations with our friends after school. Homework suffering on meeting nights. No college or university. Pressure to pioneer rather than build a career. No dating unless we had 'marriage in view'. You all know the score.

  She has said to me "I did what I believed was best for you [Nic']", and I know she did. Thing is, I'm convinced she'd repeat all the same mistakes given a second chance because she herself abdicated rational thought and independant decision making in favour of conformity and groupthink.

  She was and still is a great Mum but I have to be brutal and say that her ideology led to poor parenting in these areas.

  God it hurt me to say that.
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  serotonin_wraith

  Children are still people, and as long as they aren't hurting anyone, they should be able to find their own way in life and come to their own conclusions. They aren't extensions of the parents in any other way than biologically.
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  nicolaou

  They aren't extensions of the parents in any other way than biologically.

  Oh I don't know about that, let's not get too unemotional about it. Rational thinking is one thing but these little ankle-biters grow up to be the darling little wallet emptiers we adore so much.
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  Scully

  these little ankle-biters grow up to be the darling little wallet emptiers we adore so much.

  truer words have never been spoken.

  LOL

  <~~ feeling nic's pain
• 

  nvrgnbk

  Teach them to observe reality and consequences without the clouding of the mind that religious dogma of any kind can cause.

  What fault can be found with that?

  Certainly no real Divine Being needs a book to explain his/her/itself.

  If the Divine is part of observable reality, the child will see that and respond in kind.

  Great topic, nic.
• 

  blueviceroy

  Jam on mama-jama

  Yes , teach HOW to think ,

  I love my son so much ,I would never ever corrupt his brain with beliefs.

  I have taught him to understand himself and by doing this he has no trouble understanding anything else.

  He sees the world in clarity for what it is , his "how" and "why" work very well.
• 

  5go

  Depends on if you are going to let them become adults and decide their own future beliefs.