They want to make me an elder :-O

by outofthebox 91 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  nvrgnbk

  Wait and see if the "holy spirit" guides them to appoint you an elder.

  It will.

  I bet you a case of beer it will.
• 

  outofthebox

  This is my conundrum:

  I say no -> My family is unhappy -> BAD

  I say yes -> My family is happy -> I blow my cover -> My family is unhappy -> BAD

  I say yes -> My family is happy -> I blow my cover -> My family realizes everything is a lie -> GOOD

  I say yes -> My family is happy -> I keep quiet -> I try to help -> GOOD & BAD

  As you can see, the problem is choice.

  -ootb
• 

  Finally-Free

  If you can come here and criticize the watchtower for it's deception, engage in deception by accepting an appointment™ and still respect yourself after that, then go for it.

  W
• 

  lovelylil

  Holy Spirit and Jehovah have nothing to do with such appointments. It is all about numbers to the org. If you look good on paper, you could privately be a wife abuser, child molesting athiest and they would not know the difference.

  Not that you are any of those things; just wanted to make the point.

  Personally I think it will hurt you emotionally to be even more immersed in the BS but do what you have to. I am wondering though if you say no, what will the elders think? This may give them their first inkling you are not in agreement with everything in the org. and can eventually blow your cover. Lilly
• 

  changeling

  If you can come here and criticize the watchtower for it's deception, engage in deception by accepting an appointment™ and still respect yourself after that, then go for it

  My thoughts exactly.

  changeling
• 

  NewYork44M

  Good luck, man. Been there done that. This is bringing back very bad memmories.

  I was in a similar situation and don't count on the HS to bail you out.

  About six months after I decided I no longer wanted to be a witness an elder called me and said in a very excited voice, "the elders are going to recommend you as an elder!"

  In that six month period prior to the phone call I was only turning in an average of 5 hours a month, but that did not matter. I was going to be an elder.

  Due to family circumstances I accepted the assignment and remained an elder for three long years. Fortunataly, there were many elders in the congregation so I did not have too much to do. But it was still very very painful.
• 

  DocBob

  RUN FORREST RUN !!!

  Seriously, as one who has been there, I would recommend against it.

  I havent read all of the other posts on this subject (I'm at work at the moment), so some of this may cover ground that already been covered.

  If you have any illusions about doing something significant to change the org for the better being an elder - forget it. The further up in any org you are, the more enslaved to it you are. Knowing what you do, think about what you would be expected to teach and how much of it you could teach with a clear conscience. Could you really serve on a judicial committee? What about if someone else who has 'seen behind the curtain' came before the committee you were on - how would you deal with them?

  Also, when the recommendation comes back from HQ, before the service meeting when they make the announcement, they would tell the guy that he had been recommended and approved and then ask if there were reason why they should not announce you as an elder. Could you honestly answer that there was no reason they should not?

  By the time I stepped down from being an elder, there was little left from the WT playbook that I could teach, I had not served on a judicial committee for a year and I felt totally disgusted every time I set foot in the hall - disgusted with both the org and myself for what we both had become. It was definitely time to part company with the org.

  If you intend to hang in and just do what you need to do for your family's sake, being an elder is a step in the wrong direction.
• 

  tooktheredpill

  OOTB: You know that you're more than a brother to me. Don't accept it. Play another card. "Thanks, but I want to help my family first"; "I have economical problems"; "I'm dealing with a depression"...

  You know how many months I've been thinking how I can get rid of my Elder responsibilities. And you know other Elders that wants to do that. There's nothing more to prove...

  TTRP.
• 

  changeling

  TTRP: your avatar shows a female symbol. Do you have something to tell us????

  changeling
• 

  feenx

  I agree that it's a personal choice, based on your own feelings and mental stamina. It would be a shame to get sucked into that life further with nothing to come out of it. On the other hand you would have the chance to help many people both in the org and on here. I don't see it so black and white as dishonest or honest. The entire org operates on rationality. This is simply another instance of that same practice. And really the only reason you would accept the position, as far as I can see, would be to help people. If they feel you're earnest enough to hold the position of elder, then that is a choice they have already made. How many elders strive to have such a position for reasons other than what is officially stated or believed throughout the org? Plenty. The question is how much of yourself you are able and willing to devote to this, because it could be very taxing. Sometimes the needs of the many outweigh the needs of the one, and sometimes the needs of the one outweigh the needs of the many. That's your choice.