Disfellowshipped

by LadyCCC 63 Replies latest jw friends

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  justhuman

  Look at it from the bright side,,,you are FREE from WT's slavery, and there is a complete new world ahead of you. Like all of us that have been disfellowshipped, we know how you feel. Your life is just beggining...believe it...you can send me a message any time if you need someone to talk.

  I know how it is...I lost my family also, my marriage broke appart, my 2 small children are in the hands of my "faithfull"ex-wife and the hands of the "loving" organization

  Once you go out there is no turning back
• 

  Tara

  Welcome to the board. This is a great place for information, acceptance, support, and healing. I recommend you read Crisis of Conscience by Ray Franz. It will take away ALL your fear and guilt. There is a wonderful support group on yahoo for ex-JW women called Women-Awake that I belong to. You would be most welcome.
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  jgnat

  But I will be pressured by family and friends with the question :(when are you coming back?)

  Here's a simple answer. "When you start treating me like a human being. Want to go out for coffee to talk about it?" If they respond, "You know why I can't do that." You can tell them, "I know why you won't, but I don't have to like it. When you are ready to talk to me look me up."

  How can I begin to tell them about my doubts and how right now I feel like I don't want to come back

  Another new concept for an exiting JW is that you don't owe everyone an explanation. It has to do with boundaries and privacy. Witnesses don't respect them. As an individual and a human being, you deserve thoughts and feelings that your own, private, and do not have to be shared.

  If you are asked an intrusive question, simply reply that your reasons are private and you don't want to talk about it right now.
• 

  RebelWife

  Hi. My husband is a recovering JW. (I've never been one.) I just had this thought: If your dog poops on the carpet, do you ignore him for six months?

  I recently read that a friend is someone who calls you when they don't have anything to say. There are people who do that and aren't really friends, but you know what I mean. They don't need a reason to call you. When you do need them, they're right there & you can't get rid of them. That's how people are when they love you. If they don't act that way, they don't really love you. So why have them?

  How do you respond to their intrusive & belligerant questions? Be straight-up and simple and don't explain. The more you explain, the less credible your explanation sounds. If they are genuinely interested, they can do their own research & then discuss it with you.

  Don't settle for scraps masquerading as love. You deserve more -- much, much more. If you believe in God, then you probably believe that all of His creations are beautiful and wonderful. Wouldn't this include you?

  Not having been a JW, I know I can't possibly understand, but I do know the feeling of having been lied to all my life and wanting to believe the lies so that weird, disorienting, surreal feeling and the who-am-I question would go away. It's been a few years for me, and it still hits me every now & then, but the real world is better than LaLa Land.