Do you ever miss it? Ever?

by AK - Jeff 59 Replies latest jw experiences

  • NewYork44M
    NewYork44M

    For a while I missed the thought that I was with a small group that was right with god in the midst of a wicked world. Once I realized that the concept was based upon a lie, I no longer longed for the un-real. I am now focues on the real life and will never go back to that garbage.

  • sacolton
    sacolton

    The "conditional" friends. Who needs them? My brother-in-law and I have been friends for a very long time. We go way back before
    I ever became a JW. I became a JW. We hung out all the time and had great times. Lots of laughs. When I DA'd ... everything just
    stopped. Funny how all those wonderful times didn't account for anything. Pretty sad.

  • Carmel
    Carmel

    Not! Jeff, how's Kiwanis going? carm

  • megaflower
    megaflower

    No, not at all. My experience "with the friends" is they are only a friend when they want something from you. If you are perceived as one who has $$$$, or infulence then you are a part of the inner circle. The ones who do not have much materially or do not have family connections they could care a rats ass about.

  • Grammy
    Grammy

    Not NO but Hell NO!

  • Layla33
    Layla33

    How can I miss something I had nightmares about for two years? Absolutely not.

  • OnTheWayOut
    OnTheWayOut

    I thought I missed it. Not the field circus, not the mindless repeating of information that
    was just read to answer questions at the WT study or bookstudy. What I thought I missed
    was serious discussions with JW friends and enjoying time together. But I was mistaken.

    This week, I met with good friends in Indiana, friends like AK-Jeff and JK666. We were able
    to be ourselves and express our opinions. Our thoughts did not have to be in harmony with
    each other's or with WT's doctrines. We could be at different places in our lives and beliefs
    yet still the best of friends.

    Further, I met with other ex-JW's this week. We could have open honest conversation.
    We could laugh at the WTS and what we used to believe. Some were fundamentalists, some
    were atheists. Some were examining eastern religion. We had serious conversations, but
    nobody was concerned about being "right" and these other people being wrong.

    Later, this week, I also met with my A.A. group. Afterward, at a restaurant, someone was
    sharing some Christian author's belief that the Muslim faith was the result of the
    gran mal seizures of one man. I said "That's an ignorant statement." My A.A. companion
    found my bold statement rather insulting. He explained that this man wasn't just spouting
    an opinion but had some serious reasons why he believed this. I said "Okay. Sorry I said
    that, but what I meant was that it is ignorant to assume that anyone who believes different
    from himself does so because of something like that, but still assumes that he, himself,
    is in the right religion. He would have to look at his own beliefs and see if the same could
    be said for Jesus or any sect of Christianity- that the beliefs could have started from something
    similar."

    He said, "Oh. I thought you were defending Islam. I suppose you are possibly right."

    The whole point was that, unlike dubs, we were all free to speak our minds and accept the
    possibility that we, ourselves, were wrong or without complete understanding.

    Now, I don't miss the conversations and gatherings with dubs anymore.

  • B_Deserter
    B_Deserter

    Yes I miss it. Since I'm still technically in I get tastes of it every once in a while. That's why it's important to build up those experiences outside the kingdom hall. I think the most difficult thing to adjust to when leaving is the fact that you have to work harder to make friends. On the outside, people aren't mandated by religious doctrine to like you, so you have to have some social skills.

  • Finally-Free
    Finally-Free

    As a JW I didn't have any friends, except perhaps one, though I occasionally was invited to "get togethers" or to a restaurant after a meeting or serviceā„¢. Had I left 5 years sooner than I did I might have missed those social occasions. The last few years as a JW I no longer enjoyed going out with other JWs, and usually looked for an excuse to decline invitations. I knew these were not real friends, and I always felt I had to watch what I said around them. It's not that I was speaking against the organization or anything, but it seemed like I couldn't talk about work, hobbies, current events, or any other interests without being reminded that these other interests should not detract from my "service to Jehovah".

    So no, I don't miss any of it. I don't have many friends, but the ones I have are great. I can talk to them about anything at all, from politics to technology to religion to the size of our most recent bowel movements. No topic is off limits and no one is made to feel bad for having a differing opinion. In fact, it's nice to be around people who have different perspectives on things. There's so much more opportunity to learn and grow than when surrounded by people who are exactly alike in thought.

    W

  • dogisgod
    dogisgod

    Just having the concept of "community" is something I miss. It was just a "concept" not reality. This made me remember ...when G. Bush stole the first election I just wished there was somewhere I could go to grieve. Just stayed home.

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