Why do you put up with crap off your JW famlies?

by dawg 78 Replies latest jw experiences

  • dawg
    dawg

    I see where many of you have JW family members that give you a ration of crap once in a while; I've heard many rationalizations as to why some of you refuse to speak out.

    As many of you know, I wrote a series of letters and exposed my apostasy formerly; in the letters I told my family they had better beware of shunning me of treating me like a pile when they run into me, I realized that I couldn't make them accept me into their houses, but in public was a different matter.

    I basically told them that in public, especially at funerals, that I would rain down a load of crap on any family member that shunned me or treated me badly in anyway.

    The first test came last month... a cousin was near death and I went to the hospital, his family (devout JWs) had a look of horror when they first saw me, but they talked and acted cordial. Remember here, I'm a damn well known apostate... that is defiantly against the rules.

    I truly believe its our fear that keeps us from making an impact. We have no strength as we do not stick together, refuse to speak out boldly... we fear what relationships we might lose all the while ignoring the fact that our cowardice allows others to suffer. If we all banded together, refused the shunning or exposed what was happening as to cause the shunner remorse for their actions, or even shame...then I believe we'd see a change in how we are treated.

    What if you called a shunner out at a funeral? Is that any harsher then them not talking to you or treating you unkind at a moment of grief? What would be wrong if you stated out loud why a family member isn't talking to you? Wouldn't that bring shame on the religion as it well should?

    And as for our unity... when we were out preaching the fairytale that is the JW faith, this unity was essential; the one thing we all should agree on is that we mustn't remain silent and that we must stand together; we should never be ashamed or afraid to speak what you really feel... isn't that what being a JW taught you?

    I read where a poster had his mother say he was an idiot and didn't love... he was stating his point and that made me proud... but how is is many of you allow your families to not even know what the hell you are really thinking. And what concerns me most, is that many of you have spouses that don't even know your real feelings... how can you live your lives as one giant lie when you know you are the one that has the real truth?

    And lastly, I see where many of you actually try and discourage those doing the right thing and telling the truth, calling them trolls and the like. You should be ashamed when you have so much fear that you can't even speak your minds... I just don't get you guys.

  • White Dove
    White Dove

    I love them and worry about losing their love. How pathetic is that? I think it's normal, actually. I need them and they, to a certain point, need me. It's best not to burn bridges.

  • 83501nwahs
    83501nwahs

    I am right there with you dawg. Incidentally, I wish you would go visit my parents and brothers and sisters in GA. Maybe you could ask them for a study or something. What part of GA are you in? I have family all over the state.

  • Awakened at Gilead
    Awakened at Gilead

    I guess each poster has their own situation... we've been this this type of thread before...

    When I first came on JWD, I felt quite similarly, and was surprised that people would fade instead of publicly declaring their rejection of JWs.

    I don't put up with any crap from my wife or my family, and I am outspoken in my beliefs. Yet my parents are not shunning me, and my wife knows exactly where I stand.

    I respect other posters that go the subtle way (this is a method Amazing recomended in Freeminds), but that was not for me. But to each his own.

  • John Doe
    John Doe

    Dawg, we all have our own methods. I'll guarantee you would not call me a coward to my face. Furthermore, I don't understand someone who denounces a high control group and then almost in the same breath wants to control the way others act.

  • OUTLAW
    OUTLAW

    Dawg..My man,your more than just a bit harsh on people who are just finding their way..You and I speak our minds come Hell or High Water..Not everybody is there yet..The best thing you can do is help them get there..Everybody learns their own lessons in their own time and in their own way.............You can lead a Horse to Water,but you can`t be a Dink!..LOL!!.............Laughing Mutley...OUTLAW

  • Eyes Open
    Eyes Open

    It's so great to be able to rely on someone else to tell me how to treat my family members now that I don't believe what the Watchtower Society tells me.

    (Have you read any books about cult mentality by experts?)

  • Black Sheep
    Black Sheep

    I don't.

    They all know my position, and that I am able to defend myself.

    None of them have taken to shunning me, as I was never baptised, (the only thing I ever got right).

    Cheers
    Chris

  • Junction-Guy
    Junction-Guy

    I hear ya Dawg

  • mrsjones5
    mrsjones5

    I've already spoke my mind to my parents. They don't like it and that's fine with me. I'm talking to my exfiance who is a jw and I've let him know that I am a Christian and have no interest in coming back - he says that's ok and still talks to me. I've just reconnected with a cousin who I love dearly. She's a firm jw and I have no wish to try and change her mind about it but she's married to a worldly man (long story) and is very open to family who aren't jws. She mentions the "friends" but only in passing when it's related to something we're talking about. I'm not afraid to speak my mind about the society, I just don't see a reason to with my cousin.

    Josie

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