There is such a thing as the gay lifestyle and also a straight lifestyle. Right now I am living the celibate lifestyle, I have lived the straight lifestyle, and I came close to accepting the gay lifestyle.
I have a choice in all of these, right now I choose to be single.
At risk - I dare a discussion of the gay lifestyle/human nature.
by AK - Jeff 64 Replies latest social relationships
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Junction-Guy
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restrangled
bek......
I appreciate your response but I left several situations out. ..... one of them being.....
The guy that came over trying to smooze all the Lesbians in my yard was a renter of a home we owned. His wife, had a brother who was gay with a permanent partner.
My husband and I became very good friends with them....( her gay brother with partner)......the problem was that one of them loved exposing themselves to us. This was a long term gay couple....as charming as all get out, but became a horrible problem in front of our boys and to our family in general.
I won't go in to details, these fellAs were so much fun but became a horrible problem. NOT A GOOD THING.!
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compound complex
It appears that many of our comments are based on personal observation and experience; is that what is called anecdotal? While potentially useful toward some eventual, long-term study, our comments probably won't find their way into any abstract on human behaviors.
My marriage counselor asked if I were continually hit-upon by men because of my appearance (not personal mannerisms particular to this or that group of citizenry). She simply assumed it must be so. Yet, I do have male friends of both persuasions who claim to be flirted with excessively, despite some not possessing the advantage (?) of comeliness.
I don't know as I never learned how to flirt ...CoCo Doesn't Get Out Much
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Junction-Guy
Maybe it was because you were married.
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scotsman
I might be wrong in this, but sometimes I get the impression that Junction Guy hasn't met many gay people, and that he might have a had a bad experience with the ones he has. It's just a hunch...
Lifestyle - wrong choice of word I'd say, but understand where you're coming from.
I'm in a monogomous relationship with a man. Our life looks a lot like the lives of other couples we're friends with friends, gay and straight. I have friends who have promiscuous sex, gay and straight. I have friends who are into fetishistic sex, gay and straight. Gay people aren't the 'other', they're the pretty much the same as you - dull/funny/freakish/ordinary/religious/agnostic etc. etc.
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Junction-Guy
Scotsman, your hunch is correct.
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PrimateDave
I am going to harp on this because only one other poster to my knowledge has even mentioned the issue of Children and Sexuality. Yes! Boo! Big Taboo Words! I know it goes way against the grain of today's dominant cultural narrative of seeing kids as Only Victims of sexuality, but there is another side to this as well. And, yes, I was sexually abused by a neighbor when I was a kid, so I know about the need to protect children.
To speak of homosexuality as a mere "lifestyle" choice conveniently puts it in the realm of an "adult only" issue when it is very much a human development issue. The woman caller on the radio program mentioned by Jeff was irate that a book, which in her opinion espouses adult choices, was in a school library. I guess that in her view children have no choices because they are completely asexual.
Well, I got news for you lady. I knew I was attracted to other males when I was 8 years old. I had full blown sexual fantasies by the time I had my first hair and covert sexual activity with another boy well before I was 18. I was at times depressed and plagued by guilt or at other times overcome by the rush of hormones and lust. There was no one to talk to about it because of the fear of rejection that I mentioned in my previous post. What would have been the point in talking? My parents and the elders, Jehovah, Jesus, the WTS, all expected me to be Straight, so that's what I had to be. End of discussion. Pray about it. Trust in Jay Hovah. Fuck that.
Millions of teens (and younger) deal with these feelings. This issue won't go away, and if our culture doesn't find a healthy way to accept it for the reality that it is, the social cost will continue to mount in the future.
Now, as an adult I do not have a "flaming" personality. You would not think I was "gay" if you met me. If you are a guy, I would not automatically be attracted to you. I also do find some women to be very attractive, though I haven't had much luck in that area.
Dave (whose hormones have mercifully subsided a great deal since the teen years)
(20 pages of bttt isn't worth one page of well thought out posts) -
BizzyBee
Good point, CoCo - we each can only go by our own small sample of the population with whom we come in contact. Thus, the pitfalls of stereotyping, second only to the pitfalls of patronization and condescension. Any minority that has been marginalized by their unique difference(s) probably experiences the fawning by some of the majority (such as white guilt). I would find it annoying, I think. My particular minority characteristics do not inspire patronizing, so I don't know for sure!
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scotsman
JG
Scotsman, your hunch is correct.
I'm getting good at reading between the lines. Primate Dave, interesting points. I wasn't molested as a minor, nor did I have sexual contact with other kids (well, I did once lick yoghurt off one hot friend's leg but I don't think that qualifies as sexual) but boy did I fantasise about having sex with a guy from a young age. The desire didn't come from a book, it sprang from within me.
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compound complex
20 pages of bttt isn't worth one page of well thought out posts.
PrimateDave:
Your post is certainly compelling and courageous. And it's truthful.
Never seemed to get help of such caliber from the Society.
Thank you very much.
CoCo