How Would You Handle A Teen Who's A Pothead & Drunk In Your Home?

by minimus 65 Replies latest jw friends

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  JWdaughter

  Best thing I ever did was let my 11 year old face the full consequences of some vandalism he got caught at with his friend. I didn't hire a lawyer, didn't mortgage the house to get him out of trouble, didn't make any excuses for him. He went to court, had to tell the judge what happened, pay for the damage AND a little fine and a bunch of community service. When he finished, it all went 'away' and he had nothing against him 'on his record', and he has NEVER vandalised again. (Still drives stupid, though, I think he is about cured of that).

  I think she should go to the local police intervention officer and talk to him. They may be able to figure something out or he can give her some tools to help her manage this effectively. And she shouldn't EVER make it easy for him to 'get away' with anything as regards school or the law.
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  Twitch

  I dunno; how would you handle a parent who's an alcoholic yet pays the bills?
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  avishai

  Boot camp only works for Delinquents (conduct disorder). If he's emotionally disturbed, which sounds more likely, it would be counterproductive. He needs diagnosis and the appropriate therapy. I worked in group homes for years. These two things can present almost the same, but the treatment is entirely different.
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  minimus

  This kid routinely has kids come over his house when mom is away and parties with sex, drugs and booze. She's gotten numerous calls while away from the neighbors, the police, even the school. No matter where he is, he finds trouble.
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  undercover

  Wait a minute...

  She knows he's a troubled kid, yet leaves him alone at home when she's away? There's a problem right there. This kid has shown that he can't be trustworthy so he shouldn't have the privilege of being left to his own devices.

  I know it's tough being a single parent, but you can't leave a trouble maker alone. He's just gonna find more trouble.
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  minimus

  He finds trouble in school, on family outings----you name it. The other extreme is being a prisoner in your own home. Plus, when she stays in, he goes out. Or runs away.