Oompa..You are a Generation Dub.....You will never shake it off!!.....It`s part of you.....Live with it.....Or..Make yourself CRAZY!!..Those are your choices..
..OUTLAW
Letting go, does it really ever happen as an X- JW?
by restrangled 41 Replies latest jw friends
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OUTLAW
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asilentone
Outlaw, very true!
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LouBelle
I believe I have truly let go - it is what it is, or was. It's not part of my life any more - I have no contact with any JWs and I don't want too. If I can remember a doctrine and shed some light on that then great - but I've honestly started to forget the stuff I used to believe - that's how far I am in letting go.
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Gayle
Maybe we should not forget. We have a unique experience that must be told. The Watchtower Society would want us to move quietly along and say nothing about it. If this site, gets one "looky-loo" (but I am sure there are many) and it prevents that person from becoming a JW, then aren't you glad. I am on an ex-JW Meetup site and one person has a JW friend and contacted me recently with questions about JWs. This person is a smart researching kind of person. I am glad to share my experience. Ones leaving the organization need these sites to not feel so alone as they untangle and clear the mental cancer placed by the mind-control of JWdom.
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Lady Lee
The reality is that we can't forget.
It is as much a part of us as what we learned in school or in the daily process of life. But as JWs the WTS was the only theme in life. It came above family, above work, above who we were as people.
And for a while being an x-JW takes center stage.
Eventually we can allow room for other things to be the center - work, family, career, hobbies, interests. The world gets larger because there is so much to explore. And we don't have to wait until the thousand years are over to start discovering what we enjoy.
Hopefully we can reach a point where the WTS is in the past. I often say in my other life. It feels like it's another life. And it doesn't have a huge part in my life anymore.
I kust joined an astronomy group that meets regularly to watch the stars. Think it might be interesting to learn something new and meet some new people
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donny
I think the speed of letting go is greatly affected by whether or not you have relatives still in the organization. My ex-wife and my son are still heavy in to it, but my two daughters have pretty much left it behind.
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LouBelle
I have my gran, aunts, uncles, cousins and of course all the "very good friends" - It's a choice - was walking away worth it? In my case it was and I would do it again to get the freedom I have now. I was and am still 100% satisfied that I left and made the stand I did.
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blondie
It takes some time and it eventually becomes a shadow without teeth. I grew up with an alcoholic mother and a pedophile father and never thought I would heal, but I have. The jw thing was my third hurdle and used the tools I learned from the first two.
Yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, and today is a gift- that’s why they call it the present.
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Scarred for life
Leaving the cult and starting a new normal life is very possible. I have done it. But being one that was raised as a JW from birth means that it will always be a part of who I am and my memories of childhood and adolescence. There is no way to escape that. I still have anger that I was raised in that way. I don't think I've ever totally dealt with that or healed from it.
I moved to another state and I have no current acquaintances that are JWs. I do have very limited contact with my extended family that are JWs. I avoid all conversations about JW stuff as much as I can with them. We talk about other things. But it absolutely is a barrier to having a closer relationship with them.
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Finally-Free
A guy I work with had a very bad fall and was out of commission for several months. He's lucky to be alive. He's back to work, has a great attitude, and walks with a cane. Physically he will never be the same, but at least he's alive.
Emotional injuries are no different. Sometimes we can heal completely, but sometimes not.
Just do the best you can with what you've got, and never be too hard on yourself.
W