AMAZING - Exposing Elders (re: Expose Ave...

by AMNESIAN 126 Replies latest jw friends

  • teejay
    teejay

    Outnfree,

    I wasn't born into the truth, but it was dang close. I was just over five years old when "Jehovah's people" found my mother and she considered herself one of the luckiest women to live since the Virgin Mary.

    I've always wondered if I would have accepted the supposed utopia, the so-called "spiritual paradise" offered by Jehovah's Witnesses if I had a few life experiences to judge it against. I'll never know, of course, but I've always tried to find out what it was about the Organization that made adult people join up. You mentioned gullibility. Surely that played a part with some.

    Throughout my life, from about the time I learned to read, in magazines, talks and assembly parts it was reiterated that the elders were not ordinary men. They were hand-picked by Jehovah with the help of his powerful holy spirit. COs, DOs, and governing body members were rarer still in ascending degrees – exceptional for their humility and biblical insight and wisdom.

    It was drilled into faithful rank & file members that if they were to be pleasing to Jehovah, they would accord these ones extraordinary honor and respect. Their lack of education, social status, or rank in the secular community was not to be considered. Indeed, those lacking such 'worldly' achievements were seen as extra special... a joke the Almighty played on the great things of Satan's corrupt system, soon to be wiped from the face of the earth.

    Except for the occasional 'problem' brother who, lacking faith in Jehovah's arrangement was never considered as an appointee in the cong; and the occasional member (usually female) supposedly plagued by mental problems that moved them to continually cause problems by having the nerve to question dubious directives, virtually every single Witness I ever knew humbly followed the elders' directions without complaint or reservation. Millions still do.

    Those who come along now and say that these 'older men' who

    blatantly pried into the private activities of married couples;

    set the standard of merciless and unforgiving treatment toward those who decided to allow their children to pursue higher education;

    showed little or no mercy in scores of secret judicial hearings wherein the accused were denied witnesses and the right to face (or even KNOW) their accuser;

    relentlessly employed nepotism and the selling of indulgences to favor those of their choosing and punish those up didn't cough up the bucks, among other atrocities...

    to say that these men are no more responsible that the average publisher who had no voice... well... they are sadly, pathetically mistaken.

  • Amazing
    Amazing

    Tina: You said,

    "Yes,no one is free from responsibility,but as you put it,and just as in courts of law,there are degrees of culpability and responsibility and accountability."

    This is all that I was trying to say as well. Culpability is not totally in the Elders hands. Degrees, though, are not determined by organizational position, though position most often increases degree of responsibility. Yet, at times, even those at the lowest levels can be as culpable, if they have certain knowledge, and do nothing, or even go along with wrong actions.

    The entire exchange was a sad turn of events, because as Amnesian said, we were talking past each other. I have to agree, and in this we both missed what each other was saying. The result is that it got too personal and inflamatory.

    I regret that you and Amnesian have not taken any opportunity to make amends, but I accept that. I see clearly now just what I have been dealing with. - Amazing

  • DannyBear
    DannyBear

    Before the 'elder arrangement'(puke,caugh,spit)the congregation's were ruled by one 'spirit appointed' male member. For year's known simply as the Congregation Servant.

    This male 'director' was the undisputed honcho, he for all intent and purpose appointed all the other 'servants' in the congregation. If you were lucky enough to have a CS who considered himself a true SERVANT of the brother's, made for some real peace among the congregation. Every important decision was made by one man. Not alot of opportunity for dispute or contention.

    That all changed in the late 60's. With the introduction of the 'body of elders'(new light) arrangement(puke). Now several males were given equal status in the congregation, equal power, equal say on all matters.

    Talk about opening a 'can of worms'. Former big wig CS's chaffed, rattled and rolled about the loss of thier former power. Eager beaver new elder's came gang busting into the congregation, feeling thier oates, overtly trying to change things overnite. So much chaos and ill will among the bodies of elder's, they could not even make a simple rotation of PO without ego's, accusations, assertions, about the next fellow in line, that letter's had to be sent to the society to resolve the issue of who got the PO position for the NEXT TWELVE MONTHS! This problem of rotation caused such a furor in the congregations, the society had to change the concept of equal power and delegation. If there ever was a policy change, that was a monumental failure, it was the 'rotating elder arrangement'. The new light, had to be revised back to the permanent PO.

    All of this had absolutely nothing to do with worship of God. It had every bit to do, with power, ego's, perks, position, and kissing butts.

    That is why I can unreservedly applaud the insight and articulate manner, in which Amnesian has cut to the quick about this 'pie in the sky' attitude, former/current elder's continuing to try and justify one moment of participation in the whole ugly political scandal. Iam not proud of one moment of the eight year's I served as a pig-dog, judgemental prick elder. Anyone that continues to serve as one, fondly recalls the power trip, or makes excuses for doing so, is just tickeling thier own fancies.

    Almost on the par of former convict's recounting thier past crimes with passionate, fond memories(we were better than the average elder..oh vomit man). Face it we were culpable, we were duped, we were just as transparently guilty as the Governing Body themselves, simply on a smaller scale. No matter what relief we think we gave to poor little trodden on brother some, we rescued, or tried to rescue.

    The ex-jw community continues to propagate this 'former position' attitude, by putting undue attention to the words or comments of those who were elder's, Co's, or Do's....on the contrary these men like myself are to be pitied for the experience. We should be ashamed of our former 'exalted' selves, not playing up our participation, contacts, or special dispensation for having been 'appointed ones'.

    Thank you Amnesian for your words.

    Danny

  • teejay
    teejay

    Anyone that continues to serve as one, fondly recalls the power trip, or makes excuses for doing so, is just tickling their own fancies. Almost on the par of former convict's recounting their past crimes with passionate, fond memories (we were better than the average elder...

    My goodness, Danny!

    I am amazed – blown away – by your simple, unadorned and cutting self-implicating honesty. Well... not really. It's the type of openness and candor we've come to expect from you here at JW.com.

    Funny... not a single arrow, not so much as a tiny inference, pointing to the supposedly "equal" guilt of those at the lowest levels of JW-dom. What the gb could learn from YOU. You simply owned up to the horrible part you played as one of the Society's more highly exalted flunkies. How refreshing to every now and then rub shoulders with your kind of humility.

    Thank you.

    tj

  • DannyBear
    DannyBear

    tj,

    Maybe a better word than humility, would be humiliated.

    Iam ashamed of the fact of ever being a jw. Let alone all the wasted year's invested in a pipe dream. I don't go out of my way to let anyone I come in contact with, know that I was ever associated with the cult.

    But my current feeling is somewhat similar to past employment. I take whatever good things learned, and try and forget about all the pain.

    Thanks for your comments.

    Danny

  • AMNESIAN
    AMNESIAN

    Disappointingly, not at all "AMAZING" ---at least, not in the way I'd once fondly perceived:

    Tina: You are a bold-faced liar.

    ...further:

    I begin this post by calling you a liar, and I end by calling you a liar. - Amazing

    ...and astonishingly:

    Tina: I called you a bold faced liar because you make silly ass allegations without one shred of evidence or the decency to make any specific point. Why? Because you cannot. Why? because you are a boldfaced liar. I not only dare to called you a liar, you are a pure liar, through and through. You have not the guts, the intelligence, or the integrity to show otherwise. - Amazing

    ...alas:

    The entire exchange was a sad turn of events...

    ...and ultimately, but not surprisingly:

    I see clearly now just what I have been dealing with. -

    Indeed, brother. Indeed.

    -AMNESIAN

  • teejay
    teejay

    Hello my new friend Amnesian. <sticking tongue out at Julie>

    I see clearly now just what I have been dealing with.

    I got one helluva chuckle when I read that. "I bet you do" I thought, and, "probably wished you'd seen it sooner!" Too funny.

    Peace,
    tj

    p.s. We are friends, right Amnesian? You and me? We are? Great!!

    See... I got this poster on here who's been pickin' on me. I can't figure out why – as nice as I am and all. Anyways, her name is Julie... and she's been real mean to me and I was... well... I was wondering....

  • larc
    larc

    Danny,

    I also pointed out that the system before the elder arrangement worked better. I also mentioned some factors that exascerbated the elder problem. Now, I have to ask: When you were an elder, were you a good person caught in a bad system, a bad person taking advantage of a bad system, or is there some other explaination as to why you did bad things?

  • DannyBear
    DannyBear

    larc,

    For the life of me, your questions border on inane. Do you think anyone can be so self effacing as to answer any of your, simplistic questions, with any degree of honesty or objectivity?

    Come on larc, you can do better. I think.

    Danny

  • GinnyTosken
    GinnyTosken

    Teejay,

    Whatever standards I use to judge elders, I feel I must first use to judge myself. If a "good elder" perpetuates the myth that the WTS is God's organization, I think a "good publisher" does the same. What varies is the degree of influence each may have.

    This is, in a nutshell, all Amnesian was saying.

    Not quite. Amnesian can correct me if I'm wrong, but if I were summing up her post, I think I would change the ending to read, "What varies is the degree of power each has. Elders have more power than publishers and are therefore more culpable." I deliberately refrained from making that judgement.

    She never said that she, or any average JW publisher, was exonerated from the part we all played in continuing the lies of the WTS. Her entire thesis however, 100% correct imo, is that the difference (and it is HUGE) is in the matter of degree. About THAT there really can be no debate.
    I think the question is worthy of discussion. Do elders play a bigger part than publishers in continuing the lies of the WTS? I'm not even sure this is the best question. Do elders cause more harm than publishers? Do elders cause the harm or do the beliefs cause the harm? Do elders have more influence than publishers over whether people remain true believers?

    I don't agree with Amnesian when she says, "The average JW has no power. Zero. None."

    I've been thinking today about whom I would blame for my becoming and remaining one of Jehovah's Witnesses. I've tried to mentally assign percentages of blame.

    Who recruited me? My parents. Dad was a more fervent believer in the beginning than Mom, so I say: Dad 70%, Mom 30%.

    How were my beliefs maintained? Who influenced me?

    Looking back, the elders were on the periphery of my experience.

    Many in my family were Jehovah's Witnesses--my parents, several aunts, cousins, my grandmother. For the person I was back then, this was strong evidence that the beliefs were true.

    I also remember the brothers and sisters in the congregation who were warm, kind, and loving. This, too, was strong evidence for me that these were Jehovah's people, so unlike cold, selfish worldly people. There were so many--the elderly couple who had no children of their own and often took me with them out in field service, the artistic brother who showed me how to draw, the brother who taught me how to swim at a hotel pool after a day at a district assembly, the special pioneer sister who considered me her pioneer partner when I was in junior high, all of the people who came to our house to play cards and laugh and talk . . . The people I knew were honest and sincere. They had researched, too. How could they all be wrong?

    My beliefs were continually reinforced by the literature I read and the talks I heard. I chose to read the books and listen to the talks, so I am not a hapless victim.

    When I went to the elders to confess a sin that could get me disfellowshipped, I knew the elders had the power to decide. I didn't think much about the elders that day, though. I thought of my family and all the friends mentioned above, what they would think, how disappointed they'd be, and how much I would miss talking with them. If disfellowshipping is a gun, publishers who shun are the bullet. Do publishers shun because elders tell them to? I think they shun because they believe it is God's will.

    Amnesian says:

    And no matter how guilty the women you care to cite, veeeeery few of them can boast slaughter and carnage in astronomic ranges elders can.
    I'm still unsure about this. I think we all had a share in the slaughter and carnage by supporting the system; elders have a more visible role. I see the relationship between publishers and elders as a codependent one--publishers give elders their power. Beliefs cause publishers to relinquish their power.

    Btw, you started your post by saying that you felt this issue was "getting muddied by the battle mentality--Amazing vs. Amnesian, elders vs. rank and file, men vs. women." I think in saying that you totally miss a crucial point. The issue here is fairly simple and is not defined by terms that are usually thrown around in discussions here.
    I shared my impression, Teejay. Amnesian discussed not only differences in power and culpability between elders and publishers, but also confronted Amazing personally, calling him an "ex-JW elder type" and expressing her dislike of what she perceived as his condescending attitude towards women.

    This argument, for the lack of a better term, isn't about individuals -- whether posters on JW.com with opposing views or male/female -- but about a very real, ongoing situation in which people are being abused and, by varying degree abusers are accountable. Male/female, men/women, Amnesian/Amazing has nothing to do with it and only cloud an understanding of the real issue. It's about the relative power (and the responsibility/culpability that is connected with it) of various members of the wts.
    I agree. That's why I posted. I wanted to express what I viewed as the core issues.

    "What did you know and when did you know it?" is a query that has been used in courts of law to ascertain the level of one's 'guilt.' It's a useful question in THIS debate.
    Yes, it is. There are many nuances of knowing and awareness, which is why I found the Buddhist link helpful. Elders do often have more information, but are they able to mentally process what they know? Are they truly aware? Are they thinking clearly or has their thinking been clouded by their beliefs?

    Ginny

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