I was raised Catholic, so of course celebrated birthdays. It was a big event with the FAMILY. Grandparents, Aunts, Uncles, cousins would all celebrate. It was a time to get things that marked us getting one year older, a year more mature to get things to carry us through our growing years. We felt very special that day, getting a little cardboard crown painted gold to wear on our heads! We dressed up and felt very loved. We reached a milestone and it was fantastic. We became a teen, we became old enough to drive. We learned how to give when it's was another persons special day. Through that we learned how to be thoughtful of others. Picking out just the right gifts, being creative.
I did that with my kids until becoming a JW, it all stopped. It took years for party invitations to stop and then finally birthday cards to stop coming in the mail. I still secretly loved it when someone went against my wishes and gave me something. Happy Birthday Purps. or at my place of work when there was a cake for me and my co-workers were happy to think of me.
Now my kids are young adults. They did not grow up with the wonderful teachings I did as a child. It's not a huge family tradition, we are working on it.
Some things I learned though from not celebrating is, that when there was no money for presents, we learned it was not that we did not love each other or think that we weren't special. We could give gifts all throughout the year, not just on a holiday.
What was lost though was a family tradition that are in my fondest memories growing up, that I did not pass on and now I miss that terribly. People that I loved and cared about thought I did not any longer. Now that I do recognize birthdays, I have to explain the change which is awkward. I know my loved ones think it's nice but I also know there are years of hurt that come to mind when I did not. It tore a family apart so needlessly.
purps
