Elder called last night and they are stopping by tonite for a 'visit'....... (page 3)

Gregor

I suggest you "get slippery" with them. Don't let them get any traction. Call and postpone or cancel your meet because "something has come up". If they pin you down for another appointment go ahead and agree then come up with a creative excuse to cancel again. If they are gunning for you they might get bored.

JWoods

I would slip out of it too - just because we all know no practical good can come of it.

We are looking forward to seeing what happens to this -

St George of England

I know you are probably being encouraged here to join Ex-JW groups and I would not say they are wrong as they will understand your problems better than anyone, certainly better than me. However I wonder if they are not like other 'therapy groups', you will just sit around still talking about the 'truth' and related matters. Probably now is the time to make new friends who know nothing of your past. Join the local woodwork, camera, wildlife, or whatever group appeals, something completely different. Just a thought.

George

Darth plaugeis

Being out for 4 years... I don't think I would meet with them, but if this is your first contact with them since leaving I could understand why you said yes. In an earlier post, I mentioned years after I left they knocked on my door at first it wasn't pleasant, but I opened the door just out of curiosity, to see what they wanted. For me it was closure. I wouldn't let them pray or anything, to me they are not spiritual leaders. When they opened the bible to read a scripture I remember "Darth would you like to read this one" Absolutely not. Like I said I felt so much better about myself after that encounter I hope you feel the same. Don't fall for their Jedi mind tricks it only works on the weak. After your training here I feel you can stand up to them. You are much more powerful than they realize.

out4good3

The benefit of them meeting you at your house is that you can terminate the meeting at any time.

You can terminate any meeting with them anywhere. Just get up, say goodbye and head towards the door.

VM44

hi troubled mind,

May I strongly recommend that you don't meet with the elders?

Also, never answer any questions they might ask you! They might not be asking in order to help you, but rather to start something against you!

Just my suggestions based on what I know.

Just never go back and move forward.

VM44

Mad Sweeney

Looks like a near-consensus: don't have the meeting.

If you were still "in" and you were planning a meeting with a couple apostates what would the Dubs consensus advice be?

willyloman

A comment on yknot's suggestion:

Actually, now would be the time for us to seek our publisher cards from this congregation so that we may transfer them when have regained our spiritual strenght

Be aware that it doesn't work that way; the elders have specific instructions not to release the cards to the publisher; their procedure is for your current secretary to obtain name and address of the secretary of the new congo to which you move and mail the cards (along with a letter of "introduction") to him. They won't surrender your cards to you; they are what ties you to the organization.

AK - Jeff

Have the meeting if you like - I wouldn't if you want to maintain your 'inactive' status for family reasons. If you don't have any reason not to be DF'd, then go for it if you like. But these guys are looking for information, not interested in you. Unfortunate but true.

Suggestion? - just don't be home. It works for those who want to end a 'study' with Jw's, why not for you? You are under no obligation to be there unless you like. Seems a little coward-like, but it would work. That approach works for three reasons:

You would be left alone for a while to work out the strategy that you and hubby wish to pursue now that he has admitted he does not want to go back either.
They have no conversation with you in which they may try to trap you into statements that could be used against you. Sometimes they will even try this on the telephone with two elders listening. They tried it with me once.
They will tire of the game before you will, since it will inconvenience them more than you. After not being home, they will call, you will not answer, they will soon give up. It should buy you six months until the next visit of the CO prob to plan what to do the next time.

I have to admit that it is not how I would do this - I would just meet them at the door and tell them to kiss my fluffy ass - but your situation probably is more delicate than mine at this point.

Wish you well in this.

Jeff

asilentone

leave a note on the door that you will be at the bowling alley or any place that you can think of, but you can be somewhere else. Be creative.

Elder called last night and they are stopping by tonite for a 'visit'.......

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