Okay a few thoughts:
1) I'm here on this forum because I have some doubts deep down inside about what I've been taught is really the 'truth.' I think that is obvious. The 12 points I listed are the things that make sense to me about what a religion that is pleases to God and based on the bible should believe.
2) Yet, despite that 12-point list, I can see that the GB's claim to being led by the Jehovah is becomming harder and harder to believe. They don't really know anything more than we do about the nearness of the end. Yet at every convention the information provided stressess more and more how close we are. I forget exactly where, at the special day assembly, it was mentioned that a certain scripture Jehovah was, via the holy spirit, helping the GB to understand that it was applying to our time right now. It had to do with either getting ready for the end or building our faith up stronger. Something like that. Everyone seems to be talking about the nearness of the end more than any other topic.
3) My defensive statements here are simply because this is what I have been taught. I've been told apostates resort to lies and half-truths, want to make decipiles of themselves, are bitter, want the org to change it's stance on matters (blood, disfellowshipping, etc) because it affects them directly not because of doctrinal soundness, that they are unhappy, that they are poison, etc. So obviously I have a strong sckeptisim to what is said here. I've also been told not to listen to what apostates say (obvisouly). However, how can one truly claim to have an open mind, to be reaonsable, and to seek truth, without looking at all sides of an issue?
4) All my family and friends are in the truth. I love them all dearly. If I stopped, I am certain they would not listen as they do not seem to have any doubts what so ever and are very much caught up in the 'we-are-so-close' mentality, save perhaps one. I'm very active right now and if I slowed down I know that would raise some red flags.
5) I also have considered that perhaps many of the things people doubt about being true about the 'truth' are indeed incorrect, but perhaps Jehovah is allowing this to test people's loyalty to his organization (if the god's organization claim is true). Yes, JWs are hung up on this point and how can you blaim them? It's been so ingrained!
6) I still feel the GB though is not being malicious. I think they are scincere. They have had all these concepts ingrained in them for so long now. I think they really believe they are trying to protect God's people. I think some people look to deeply for dirt on them (i.e. REGI. U.S. stock).
7) It's obvious that the org is not perfect. That many have the mentality of following men. An people do get mistreated at times. Yet there are also many sincere people that are happy and like to help others. These seem to be the majority of the very active ones. These are the ones I enjoy being around and add happiness to my own life. So to leave this behind would be very difficult to do.