Amazing wrote:
"I was able to get my wife and children out, and this led to my son-in-law and a close friend leaving at the same time. So, I am among the more fortunate in that my immediate family, and non-JW friends and relatives were all there with me as I exited. Were it not for this close and needed support, I may not have done as well emotionally".
That has to be the understatement of the century.
"Thanks for your comments - and I hope that in time your JW friends and family will open up to you, or even leave the religion and seek close association with you once again....Be prepared, for one day you may see at least one person call you out of the blue - and it will be fun to talk to them again". - Amazing
I have truly enjoyed your posts and I'm surprised and embarrassed to admit that I have found myself struggling to like you. I am not quite sure why. Could it be jealousy? If I apply ruthless honesty to myself, I must admit that I have succomed to this most base of human emotions. I have always been one of the most unjealous people I know, so it's quite disconcerting..
It appears from your posts, that you managed to ride high and mighty as an annointed Elder, a most prestigous position in the JW version of reality. It seems like you got to squeeze almost every ounce of psychological accolade from your experience of riding the charging white steed along with your peer group of generals and theological tacticians. The delusional feelings you must have felt while in the JW mindset must have been phenomenal even if humility was a core value. You certainly seem to be a nice enough guy.
Then, when you learned the truth about the Truth, you once again managed to achieve the unachievable by getting your entire family and a son-in-law out... a most favorable outcome comparable to a paradise earth utopia when compared to the rest of us. Surely your previous position commanded attention and demanded your loved ones to seriously consider your new found position. No doubt the political posturing you evidently mastered to a fine degree together with patience, intelligence, and a stategic theological line of questioning in your family studies, comparable to; "Is it really so that God has said that you must not eat of every tree of the garden"?, has produced the outcome you now enjoy and that has become the catalyst for a realization of my not-so-perfect personality.
But, Mr. Amazing most of us here in the trenches did not get the strategical grooming and political posture training you received. We fell hook, line and sinker for the illusion of Truth and were not privy to the underpinnings of much of the freedom you enjoyed as an elder. Many of us were raised in this religion, sometimes our families go back several generations.
Because our commitment to "truth" was so intense, when we learned the truth about the truth we immediately (or almost) took a stand and now find ourselves totally ripped from the fabric of normal family life, as if we ever had one in the first place. No one in my family going back 4 generations and as wide as 3rd and 4th cousins has ever left this religion.
We relate more to the "Man from Bogota" parable:
Sometime around the turn of the previous century an anthropoligist journyed to Columbia and discovered a tribe of people who were all genetically blind from birth. He fell in love with these people because despite being blind they were able to care for their needs and do all the normal things to sustain life. He marveled at their work ethic and ingenuity which, to them it was just normal. They took him in and shared their way of life with him. He decided to make it his life's work to help these people.
He started by telling them that the meat they were cooking was burnt black from the fire and suggested they cook it a little differently. He was ignored with a smile. Undaunted, he was determined to give these nice people an idea of what they were missing. He informed them about a herd of deer that he could see down wind a bit from their village, thinking this would surely summon a hunting party. He was visibly ignored when he made this comment.
He continued for some time with his "help" and finally gathered them all together and tried to explain the concept of color. He spoke in glowing illustrious terms about natures' canopy in the rain forest and how it was alive with infinite shades of green. He related how the sunlight would make the leaves twinkle as the leaves fell softly to the ground as if dancing to some unknown accompaniment.
The group of normally friendly natives stopped up their ears and cried out to seize him. Four of the strongest men held him down and one of the elders took a half burned stick from the fire and procedded to burn out his eyes, thus ending his view of the world.
So, while I appreciate all the posts you have made, and certainly hope you never stop posting here; please excuse the occasional jabs you encounter from time to time. My little bout with jealousy will pass and I'm sure I will grow from the experience. While I thought Amnesia's hidden agenda didn't really compliment her formidable intellectual skills, and she took it a little too far, I can relate to some of her frustrations.
However, I admire your courage and commitment to practicalness while exiting, even if the ivy league position gave you more clout. It seems to have been a blessing both to your family and to us as you relate the various events during that time in your life. Please keep them coming....even if some of us secretly love to hate you :-)
For many of us, though we build multi-million dollar companies, achieve academic recognition, or build a friend network that rivals an MLM scam, we would give all our vast resources and accomplishments in life to gain our families back.
So as you go fishing with your son and talk with your daughter and sit for a family meal at Thanksgiving, I hope that you pray a little prayer of personal thanks. Because for most of us the reality of the situation leaves only two choices. Continue to love the unlovable, reason with the unreasonable, and ignore the unignorable and pay the consequences; or, simply allow the fading memories of a family once cherished to live on in a heavy heart while attempting to build a new family outside relatives and JWdom.