How (not) to destroy a thread and turn it into a battleground

by Terry 78 Replies latest jw friends

  • Terry
    Terry

    We are adults here and don't want JWN to reflect a hostile enviornment for lurkers who may

    wish to learn about the Watchtower. Many first timers might be very curious to discover whether

    so-called Apostate sites are crawling with mean-spirited monsters or not.

    Kingdom Halls are not the loving kindness oasis the Governing Body sells like Kool-Aid.

    But, if we aren't more civil with each other here, we might not be a reasonable alternative either.

    So, I thought I'd give my two cents. What destroys civil discourse? How can we moderate ourselves like adults and respect each other?

    In no particular order I'll list a few things that could be better.

    I'd like you to join in and add to the list. Maybe just the exercise itself will help make us more mindful that we are a community of like-minded

    people with more in common than controversy.

    !.Baiting others with insulting or provocative Topic Headers leads to fights. Democrat vs Republican. Tea Party vs Socialism. Atheist vs Believer, etc.

    2.Failure to DEFINE our TERMS leads to misunderstanding. We may be fighting over a misunderstanding if we don't clearly DEFINE.

    3.Take ONE point at a time before moving on to a hundred other things.

    4.Cut and paste should never replace YOUR OWN IDEAS. Small references or quotations support better if the are BRIEF.

    5.DENSE long-winded paragraphs of text will NOT BE READ. If nobody reads your text why post it?

    6.Disagree by saying why something is incorrect and support the "why" with specific examples. Who cares if you don't agree if no reasoned response provides an alternative?

    7.Facts are better than mere opinions. Source your facts.

    8.Ask yourself what you are trying to persuade others to accept. Being clear about your call to action makes you more effective.

    9.Learn to IGNORE trouble-makers by NOT ACKNOWLEDGING THEM. Trouble-makers crave a fight. It puts them on center stage. Ignoring them

    shuts them out in the dark with their poison all to themselves.

    10.Be quick to apologize if you offend. If you are in an emotional state of mind, cool off before you post.

    Now I'd like to read some of your ideas how we can make JWN a more friendly enviornment for the exchange of ideas.

    Before you do, first scroll through the various Topic Headings and see what we are doing right now.

    Ask yourself if the topic heading is:

    1. NEUTRAL 2.NEGATIVE 3.POSITIVE

    What could make it better?

    I myself had started this topic with the heading: HOW TO DESTROY A THREAD AND TURN IT INTO A BATTLEGROUND.

    After writing this post I changed it to: How (not) to destroy a thread and turn it into a battleground.

    See the difference?

    Thanks!

  • pirata
    pirata

    Great post. I would like to add one more:

    11. Add-Hominem attacks.

    Calling "witness apologists" idiots and eggheads and all manner of insults does nothing to forward the discussion, except to satisfy some urge to beat up on some (hopefully) sincere poster that the group doesn't agree with. Debate ideas. Don't attack posters. Such behaviour is what almost prevented me from joining this board in the first place.

  • sizemik
    sizemik

    Yeah . . . like your post and always timely . . . tried to think of something to add but all the points are covered I think.

    I'll be happy just to give this a bump occasionally (self reminder)

  • aSphereisnotaCircle
    aSphereisnotaCircle
    9.Learn to IGNORE trouble-makers by NOT ACKNOWLEDGING THEM. Trouble-makers crave a fight. It puts them on center stage. Ignoring them

    I find it interesting that many here feel the need to argue with trolls.

    Im on a couple of other forums about unrelated topics and on those forums, everybody simply ignores trolls.

  • NomadSoul
    NomadSoul

    12. Shut the F up Terry.

  • ThomasCovenant
    ThomasCovenant

    9 .Learn to IGNORE trouble-makers by NOT ACKNOWLEDGING THEM. Trouble-makers crave a fight. It puts them on center stage. Ignoring them

    shuts them out in the dark with their poison all to themselves.

    I couldn't agree more than with this point no 9. There are some posters on the site that I regret to say stir up feelings of what can only be described as violent, nay murderous hatred . I cannot see the point of arguing with them; they NEVER acknowledge any middle ground.

    I try and follow Lady Lee's advice. 'If I can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all.'

    10.Be quick to apologize if you offend.

    Try and imagine, as Simon points out, that we are in his house having a little get together. He has invited us around and we should try to just be civil at least. (I think by now the police would have been called in for some major public disorder)

  • ABibleStudent
    ABibleStudent

    Refrain from calling JWs borg, witlesses, etc. Also, is it better to free the minds and Holy Spirit of JWs or to launch vicious and long-winded attacks on JWs? Are JWs the problem or are the doctrines, policies, and practices of the WTBTS that prohibit JWs from thinking for themselves the problem? Sometimes asking questions get people to think more than making declarative statements.

    Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

    ABibleStudent

  • BizzyBee
    BizzyBee

    Suggested title:

    "Note to Self"

  • Terry
    Terry

    Agreed. Bad ideas are driven out by better ideas.

    Wrong arguments are dissolved by Right arguments.

    What is True surfaces in contrast to what is False.

    A Positive atmosphere allows everybody to breathe free; a poisonous comment chokes off reasoned discourse.

    (put those in your Fortune Cookie)

  • StoneWall
    StoneWall
    7.Facts are better than mere opinions. Source your facts.

    Is this a fact or merely your opinion? You say to source your facts and yet fail to provide any links or other evidence to substantiate this statement.

    I'm just teasing with you Terry.

    Keep fighting the fine fight for truth, justice and fact over fiction (or fantasy)

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