Ooooh - that mutt HAS TEETH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
How (not) to destroy a thread and turn it into a battleground
by Terry 78 Replies latest jw friends
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steve2
Terry, you've raised many excellent points. Sticking to the facts is great in principle: Sometimes people have access to the same facts but reach very different conclusions. Eg., the witnesses often agree that the Watchtower has got its expectations/predictions wrong but interpret that as the light getting brighter, etc. Facts are brilliant - its what you do with them that comes across as "opinion".
More directly, I can still be (relatively shocked) by the verbal attacks of posters when I dare to question aspects of what a well known poster such as Mrs Anderson has said. Note, I haven't labelled her or attacked her personally. Some posters will even begin their response by saying, "I haven't read the previous posts on this thread, but I feel compelled to say...." That gets to me because it's as if the need to automatically and unthinkngly defend someone takes precedence over the content of what I've said. Or posters will chime in with banner-waving cheerleading, "Ignore him Barbara...he doesn't know what he's talking about..." . It can sometimes feel like the Kingdom Hall revisited when Witnesses literally blocked their ears and responded by personally attacking the doubter's motives.
Having said that, I accept that we are all "just" humans - communicating the best way we know how. I also concede that it can seem audacious and presumptuous to question what well-known posters have asserted.
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lovelylil
Terry, Great List!
I will add one thing I HATE;
When someone doesn't agree with my opinions and proceeds to tell me that I still have the "Witness" mentality. I never had the Witness mentality when I was a Witness! If I did, I would still be one. This is the ONE thing that gets my goat more than anything else.
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keyser soze
This is the ONE thing that gets my goat more than anything else.
It wouldn't if you didn't still think like a witness.
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Band on the Run
Terry,
This thread warmed my heart. Its timing was synchronous as Jung would say. Yes, almost spooky. Yes, this is Band who will not hide her light under a basket. I suspect much has to do with the medium. Decades after leaving, any Witness topic gets me high strung. Combine that with the lack of social cues on the Internet. Im supposed to be too ashamed to admit it but when I worked for the Senate I saw some interesting things. The opposing Senators were so genial when the cameras weren't around that I found it shocking. When the cameras arrived, all hell broke lose. When the cameras left, there was not the slightest harsh feeling left.
Twelve Step work and its no cross talk policy (No commenting on another's share, no advice giving) has taught me that no one can judge another's opinions. They are valid for that person only. Here, we want vigorous debate and many people solciit advice and experience. I left a post with my reflections on how I perceive the forum to not be much about the Witnesses but much silly stuff. Perhaps one of the responses I received would have said their comments to me in person. And I must also be too willing to go for the jugular.
The Internet seems to need heightened civility standards. When I read the posts, I think that often this is the best commercial the Witnesses could run against us. I am relatively new. After carefully reading heated exchanges that often disintegrate into insulting visuals (some of which I admire the creativity involved), I have no clue what the gripe is. I've never seen a forum with such a range. Someone with serious academic qualifications can discuss ancient Hebrew grammar and word connotations while another post deals with favorite songs of the 1970s. Jesus left the love one another command.
I've seen trolls before. Wikipedia's prime directive is not to feed them. Yet I do. It is so hard not to do so. There is much love and kindness here but I see frequent mean spiritedness and a desire to cut someone for the pleasure of cutting someone. I confess that I have not much experience with internet forums.
I had some kind comments to my thread. Someone mentioned that newbies feast on the meat of Witness doctrine and ignore the rest. I don't know whether I will stay or go. Excuse my NYness. If I leave, this forum loses something valuable just as when anyone is insulted and leaves. Staying just to prove I cannot be bullied is not workable. There are so many other wondrous things to do in life.
I value the Witness material. It has been my only chance in all these years to validate my experiences. So many times I thought I was unique. What I've found is that it was not me that was strange. Rather, a very small religion is a cult.
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AGuest
Thank you for being an example Terry.
Unfortunately, dear Terra (peace to you!)... or fortunately, depending on which side one stands... it appears that, like the Bible and personal journaling, an Internet board can sometimes be a mirror (as much as a window).
Peace!
A slave of Christ,
SA
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Kensho
When I first started lurking here I found some of the discussions very interesting and of course there are many hateful post here about your ex-comrades in the Org. from people who have an extreme hate for all things WT and the Org. it is obvious the are emotionally damaged and wrightfully so.
It appears that some who spend a great deal of time here starting many threads and post really have nothing else to do with thier time but start very caustic attacks on others as they likely have no new light of their own to shed.
I agree with Terry some post would scare off many a curious JWs looking for the other side of the story in order to deal with thier inner conflicts that we all have concerning "the Truth" and seeing some of the goofy things on here would be a turn off to many and they will never venture out of the BOX again. Saying to themselves "man the GB was absolutley correct about those evil apostates!"
I am usually unaffected by the things on here as I have somewhat of an open mind (why I have had it rough in the Org.) and I try to respect everyone's opinion and commend many on this forum for bringing some solid evidence of the misgiuded men called the GB who control the lives of millions with just a stroke of a pen.
So I agree the is no real way to control the post here but I think the suggestions put forth by Terry and others should be considered by all who are truly interested in promoting The Real Truth.
Kensho Satori
PS aSphereisnotaCircle could you pm me give with some other forums you have visited please or you can post them here.
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sabastious
I apologized for calling everyone oversensitive twats.
...don't forget you specifically mentioned women, lol!
-Sab
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sabastious
When someone doesn't agree with my opinions and proceeds to tell me that I still have the "Witness" mentality. I never had the Witness mentality when I was a Witness! If I did, I would still be one. This is the ONE thing that gets my goat more than anything else.
That is totally something a Witness would complain about!
-Sab
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Terry
Terra Incognita: Like you Terry, who in your first response to me, called me silly and fatous. Hypocrite.
You are being disengenuous once again. You made this complaint before and I responded that my statement was CONDITIONAL.
Here is what I stated. Notice the CONDITIONAL nature of of my wording and ask yourself how you can possibly take it personally.
Post 10653 of 10753 Topic Atlas Shrugged pt.1
Terry responded:
I personally don't really care about Ayn Rand's opinions of the American Indian. I'm unaware of the reason why YOU DO.
I don't personally have a stake in the plight of the American Indian. I'm unaware of the reason YOU DO.
I think Objectivist Philosophy is consistent with itself. I assert that Christianity and its practioners is INconsistent.
That's about the total of my contribution to this discussion.
If you want to pick a fight TAKE A STAKE in it.
Where are YOU coming from philosophically?
Until you state YOUR position you are only hiding behind a safe wall and throwing dirt clods.
You are fatuous if you think I have any interest in defending the rantings of silly old woman who shot from the hip.
She had her opinions and made them clear. I have my opinions and I make them clear.
You, on the other hand, seem to have no opinions that you will own. Why is that?