I have thought about this a lot. In looking back at my failed first marriage, I realized that my belief that I should be submissive, combined with certain personality traits (I hate conflict and am kind of the martyr type) caused a very dysfunctional marriage. We didn't fight, because he did whatever he felt like, no matter the impact to me and out children, and I just took it, as I felt I had to. I resented him and he knew it, I felt stuck because I couldn't get a divorce. I know other JW did women did not respect headship and would not have stayed married under those circumstances, so I can't blame the religion totally, it was a combination. Just like some JW men still treated their wives with respect, while some used the headship teaching to be bullies.
Things are very different with my husband now. He wouldn't dream of treating me that way. We are equal partners. I still have to work on dealing with conflict and talking about problems or issues, but I know sucking it up and then being resentful is not healthy. At first I would be an exploding doormat, you know, not say anything about problems until I had a meltdown. But I gradually got better at it. My husband does not even want me to be a meek submissive wife. It's something I still have to work on, but I have come a long way.
