What do I do about this?

by dissonance_resolved 84 Replies latest members private

• 

  rebel8

  Do what losingit suggests. Proper authorities are the only ones who can bring justice to the perps.

  Also, find a way to tell your husband about this to protect your children. If you can't find a covert way of doing it (providing copies to him, etc.), then just come clean. Snooping is a MUCH lesser misdeed than participating in the cover up! "Look, I did something I shouldn't have done. But the fact is, I did it, and now I have a moral responsibility to do something about what I discovered, and that means protecting my kids."

  Holy cow. What would y'all have this poster do? Be in a family therapy session with her children a few years from now, giving excuses about why she allowed them to be around a known molester?

  I get it. "Leaking confidential info" is an ethical conundrum, but I view it as a justified wartime tactic. The only way this cult is going to stop abusing children is by the spotlight being shined upon its dark corners.
• 

  Aunt Fancy

  If I were in your position I would definately get copies and take it to the police. If you don't want to be found out then you can mail them or take them in and hand deliver them. The child abuse policy of the WTS is in my opinion the worse policy against children. They are giving a free license for perverts to go out and abuse innocent children. They rob them of having any kind of happy normal childhood just by being in a cult but then you add child abuse on it and it can destroy their life if they do not get proper care and we know that most JW's do not get proper mental care. I would also not want my children around that man at all in any circumstances. Protect your children at all costs. I would NEVER allow them to spend the night. I don't think I could look at a family friend the same way once I knew they were a pervert. Your husband needs to know what you found out so he too can protect your children. There are ways you can do it without him knowing how you got the information. Send yourself the information and show him what you received in the mail today.
• 

  Aunt Fancy

  I also was thinking you might want to contact Barbara Anderson or Bill Bowen for some direction because they know a lot about this subject and maybe they could give you some good advice. Hang in there. I know you have to be so stressed over finding this out. I am sure there are a lot out there in those files that would make our heads spin. Please let us know how you are doing.
• 

  rebel8

  Hell, after I was done with mailing it to the police along with the specific details they needed to investigate, I'd probably mail copies to my elected official who sits on a committee that could do something legislatively about this, the media and the rest of the congregation.

  In NYS in recent years, a legislator extended the statute of limitations temporarily (passed legislation to do so), just so a specific child abuse case could go forward. Your elected officials can help.
• 

  nonjwspouse

  DR , you are the childrens ONLY hope, sadly.

  You also are the only hope for future victims. Cell phone camera is an excellent idea. Regardless of the fallout, you need to do this and make sure there are back up hard copies etc beforeyou show it, if you do, which divulging information. The authoreities need to be involved.Children are being raped.

  You are in the horrible situation of having to vhoose between what is morally right as you know it, and keeping peace.

  You know already in your heart what to do.

  I will keep you activvly in my thoughts.
• 

  nugget

  This needs to be tackled in several directions. Certainly the authorities are better equipped to prosecute and investigate child abuse , however there is a very real prospect that your children will be on field service with their father and they need to be equipped to protect themselves. You will not always know who he plans to work with and who is a paedophile and who isn't you only know about this one but who is to say he is the only one. It may also be that your husband finds two children too much of a crowd on the doorstep after a while and gratefully accept offers from others to work with them causing them to be separated in the future. The watchtower does not consider children part of the congregation and sees the responsibility for their care to be with the parents. The elders do not have a duty of care for them. This was part of the societies defence on the Candace conti appeal papers. If anything were to happen to your children the organisation would blame your husband for a lack of vigilence.

  If your husband insists on taking them out and you cannot prevent it by having something else you need to do with them then they need to be able to keep out of danger. You need to establish groundrules for field service. The children should always be in sight of their father. The children should not go off in a car with anyone else however well known. Where possible the children should be with their father. The children should never go off on their own with another brother however well known. You can say this should apply to all males so that no one appears targeted or can take offense. I am sure you can think of other things that are appropriate to your specific circumstances. The children should be aware of the rules and be able to insist on them being kept.

  I would make the rules a condition on them going out and if they are infringed insist that they stay home.
• 

  Giordano

  That's great advice from Nugget!

  You can also Google their names and see what comes up. The Sex registry is also good as you can target their location by street or zip code.

  In fact take a look at your neighborhood on a registry and tell your husband what you found out about sex offenders in your area....that's one way you can introduce the subject and the need for him to be watchful. You can also bring up the Conti case and the fact that a witness with a past record molested her over a period of years.

  Why did your Dad still have the file and notes in his bag........... is their something still pending? At least you know he knows. Perhaps he mentioned something to your husband about keeping a watch.

  It would be very difficult to approach your Dad directly as he is bound by confidentiality. And your relationship re your fade and snooping could be a problem you don't need right now.

  But the bigger issue is protecting other children so you should write to the local police anonymously......... lay out the names and any other information so they can follow up.
• 

  VIII

  You have been given lots of good advice.

  You have a responsibility to your children and to the other children out there to protect them from this predator. If he has done it once and gotten away with it he will do it again. More than likely he is doing it now, as I type this to another child(ren). You have to stop this man from abusing more children. Your father has to be told that you know and you have to go to the Police.

  How will you feel when your children come to you and say they were abused by Brother Elder and you knew he was a Molestor and you could have stopped it yet didn't?
• 

  ABibleStudent

  Hi dissonance_resolved, DITTO what other posters wrote about going to the police and do not stop to talk to your father or husband. Tell the police what you saw and how the WTBTS's doctrines surpress elders from divulging child abuse/molestation to the police, and let them decide whether to investigate or not.

  If you try to handle this situation without the police, you will be no better than the WTBTS. The police are better trained to investigate than you are or the WTBTS.

  Peace be with you and everyone, who you love,

  Robert
• 

  Pams girl

  For the sake of the innocent, please report this to the police as soon as possible.