It's ironic that we like to disparage the JW elders as window-washers who know NOTHING about counselling people, but as soon as they leave the KH, they are all-wise and good at giving advice.
I want to communicate better, and would appreciate your help.
by KateWild 111 Replies latest members private
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cofty
Talesin - About a month ago you publicly apologised to me for being "a right bitch for the past couple of years" and asked if we could start fresh...
Didn't last long did it?
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Oubliette
Talesin, your point is valid, to a point. However:
- Not ALL elders know/knew nothing about counseling,
- Many of us that have left the organization have actually taken it upon ourselves to learn something about the subject, and
- You'll notice that most of us here, including current and ex-elders, do NOT give advice on subjects which we are not qualified to discuss.
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Apognophos
I, for one, did not read the thread in question, so I can only comment in generalities based on what I've seen on the board. This is definitely an unusual forum in my experience. Honestly, there are a lot of sensitive people here and a lot of contentious people. There are a number of forum members who dish out rudeness and yet take a dive at the slightest perceived insult, feigning outrage and demanding an apology.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LC-H2wXK4T4
Then there are the snipers whose posts consist mainly of attacking other people and hiding behind a pretense of simply being objective and fact-oriented. EntirelyPossible struck me as someone who enjoyed sniping at other people, and I'm glad to hear he's been banned. Unfortunately we still have some snipers here. There will probably always be some.
I would say not to worry about your communication. It's true that I have accused you in the past of "bad faith" posting, what you referred to as your "wind-up" behavior, which I think came mainly from spending too much time here. As long as you keep the forum as a balanced part of your life and resist the urge to rile people up (an urge I can relate to, believe me), I don't think your communication will need any improvement.
You strike me as much more people-oriented than others in the autistic spectrum that I've encountered (perhaps because they were all men?), though my experience with Asperger's is limited. But since you do care about others' feelings, I think that is enough to guide your posting in a positive direction and you shouldn't worry so much about how you come across.
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snare&racket
I think the WT World is still very all consuming for many of us, for you Kate, it has just moved from a KH to a forum. It happens to us all, but it is important to remmeber this is not a commune, it is not a bastion of unity, love and peace. It is merely an exchange of opinion and at best signposting people to information or on a bad day, a friendly hug. But this is not a refuge, a shelter from the rain. All the things the KH and JW religion claims to be. It is a temporary mental respite,where people can talk, think and ask freely.
The quicker you/we/I get busy living and leave WT behind the better.
You have huge potential, now you are out of the organisation, don't lose too much time to dwelling on it all. This is VERY hard to do. Sometimes it has even overwhelmed me so much it has distracted me from some very important things in my post JW life.
Get busy living Kate, you seem to spend a lot of time here snd have broken records on posting. With the grewtest respect, maybe you are losing perespective of what this is. It is just a forum.....on the interweb...
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Viviane
Since this thread was started by Kate quoting me, I'll jump in again.
We worked things out via PM. She has realized that she was saying things about me that were 100% pure assumptions and untrue and will try to figure out how to stop doing that. I will try to be nicer in the way I post to her. Kate has realized that any talk of banning was purely and entirely a product of her imagination.
We are working things out such that she doesn't make stuff up about me, to take my words at face value and to ask if she has any questions. It's all good.
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confusedandalone
Viviane thanks for clearing that up because it was insinuated that it was me that caused this.
Thank you
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cofty
Group hug?
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Viviane
Sorry Cofty, too much risk of a bad touch from strangers.
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Band on the Run
Kate,
You came here with a burst of energy. It was clear someone new was in town. You were open about your perceived disability. I have yet to see an inappropriate post. This is not a normal sampling of the human race. I worried that you were letting yourself be open to some sick people. People who like you rarely bother to tell you. What appears on the board is a small segment of nasty people. If you a person of any value, you want to stand out. Abraham Lincoln had a funny but true line about not being to please people all the time. In campaign training, they tell you to focus on your message and not to waste time and energy convincing naysayers.
Don't believe that every negative thing is b/c of Asperberger's. Asperbergers has nothing to do with it. All the people supporting you also experienced your Asperbergers. I spend too much time here. You opened up your heart and soul. If this is your first incident with nastiness, you are blessed. You don't want to be part of the wall paper. Nasty people here can make you hurt. My pms are full of praise or neutral. You need some support with your challenges. Use this place. You might ponder what you are doing correctly. I am much older than you. You will get to where you want to be. It is hard to see the process involved in the midst of the chaos and pain.
I haven't noticed a single post that would have me nod my head and say "Asperberger's." You are KateWild, not Asperberger's.
