Married Guyz / Extramarital "Friendships&a...

by SPAZnik 66 Replies latest social relationships

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  SPAZnik

  lol @ LB & harm.
  
  lmao @ hmmm.

  heehee heaven. itz kewl that the two of u r on the same page.

  Edited by - SPAZnik on 16 August 2002 19:20:28
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  SPAZnik

  jeepers i can hardly keep up with this thread. (not that i'm complaining!)
  
  if i haven't responded to ya please know i'm not ignoring.

  Edited by - SPAZnik on 16 August 2002 19:21:38
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  Prisca

  Another question to ponder...

  What if a guy flirts with you, gives the impression he is single (not just to you but others think he is single too), and then you find out he is already married?
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  BeautifulGarbage

  What if a guy flirts with you, gives the impression he is single (not just to you but others think he is single too), and then you find out he is already married?

  Prisca,

  You have MY permission to swiftly implant the tip of your shoe into his southern "opening" until it meets his northern one.

  Andee
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  bitter mango

  ((spazzy))

  1) how sure are you that these men aren't "joking" around?? how far have you gotten to determine this? in my experience, sometimes it can seem like a married man isn't joking around when he says he wants to hook up with you and then by the time you have them in the position (for lack of a better phrase, lol) to actually do the deed, they won't. however, the fact that they let me get that far with them makes me wonder... oh my, i should mention that i'd never sleep with a man i knew was married!! but i have been stupid enough to "test" them.

  2) if a married man can avoid you finding out he is married, he's not going to tell you, right? especially if he is just looking for a lay. unfortunately, i learned this the hard way! so, if you aren't aware a man is married, and he tells you he is married but still 'jokes' around about having sex with you, then is he really sincere in his requests? (not being sarcastic, i really want some opinions/thoughts here)

  3) i went for drinks with some of my married pals from work the other night. i was the only lady present and they all flirted with me, i flirted back. in some cases i started it knowing they were married. it was innocent fun. i don't think flirting with other people while you have a 'significant other' is a bad thing. i think it's completely natural and i think that people who don't agree have jealousy issues. please don't anyone smack me

  4) why is this thread only about men?? i know plenty of women who are more than willing and often do cheat on their lovers.

  5) don't get married if you like to roam and prowl and have various sexual partners. there's nothing wrong with being with more than one person, just make arangements to have open relationships which all parties agree upon, or else avoid marriage all together if the person you are with would (or does - if they are aware and stupid enought to saty with you) consider your behavior "cheating", and please, always use a condom!

  just some thoughts
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  SPAZnik

  Kingpawn:Great reply.
  
  1. re: thinking a single woman iz basically hot to trot. Yes, Thatz actually true of at least two guys that showed me excessive attention shortly after my divorce. Hell, they were probably right, lol, only i wuz dealing with this extra jdub baggage and not sure how i felt morally about the idea.
  
  

  women can go without sex for long periods of time and not miss it as badly, if at all

  Really?! this is news to me. i think we just "fake it" better. (fake not missing it i mean. lol)
  
  2. yeah i've heard those theories too. not sure what i think of that. i know a woman that says she'd have 7 husbands if it didn't break biblical law. i'm not sure if its in a mans dna to be more polygamous or if it is just socially more acceptable for men to be that way. that said, i'm a woman, and i don't think i'm into more than one relationship at a time.3 & 4. Ah, the mid-life crisis. Which can come at almost any age, no? I find men in their late 30's early 40's virtually irresistable. Too bad it often takes cheating on their wives in order to feel the same way about themselves. A challenge, an opportunity, a conquest? Interesting.
  
  

  Now, where I work, the amount of openly expressed sexual desire is making us a legend in our county.

  lol...your workplace sounds pretty playful.
  any serious crap come out of it yet, or mostly all done in good fun and taken as such by most?
  thanks again for your post and many insights.
  
  
  SPAZ
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  SPAZnik

  oh and as for the grass being greener on the other side,

  ...not if you water yer own lawn!
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  SPAZnik

  Seeker4
  
  Another great post.
  
  Yes, i've encountered some men with a situation something like yours.
  
  
  

  I also have to say that NO ONE went into this with their eyes shut.

  I believe you when you say this because of the honesty/candor in the rest of your post. It makes me happy that you and your wife are able to figure things out. I'm sure your honesty is playing a big role in that.
  
  
  

  It's far too complex for a simple answer

  Amen to that.
  
  
  SPAZ
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  SPAZnik

  I hafta disagree with the "men are pigs" statement that keeps coming up.
  
  Even though it's said in fun...i really don't agree with it.
  
  I didn't mean for this thread to sound anti-men, if it does.
  I guess i just phrased the title and my question that way because
  it is 10:1 a man that comes on to me rather than a woman.
  
  Admittedly, it has been from both "camps" tho'.
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  SPAZnik

  Sentinel/Karen,

  thanks for your thoughts.
  
  i'm not sure i view it as a "love" thing, but i see your point.
  
  i think both men and women think of sex all the time.
  
  being respectful is a good comment.
  
  i guess it is basically out of respect to fellow womankind
  (i've heard so many stories of heartbreak/ache)
  that i get "leery" about the whole sleeping with a married guy thing.
  i try to put myself in "her" shoes. i can't help but think of "her",
  
  no matter how much i don't want to.
  
  
  SPAZ