To the people of the USA from the people of Europe,
Europe is a corrupt and evil steeeeenking morass of humanity. We have bad teeth, smell, and cannot speak Merkin proper although we try, modelling our speech on M&M.
We have only recently had electrickery, and are very greateful for the great American invention of 'demockcrazy' which has liberated us from the oppresive egg yolk of our inbred Royal Families. We have several Royals for sale should you choose to have one family controling your country handing power from father to son.
We are also advancing to the stage of development we so aspire to as seen in daytime American. We are also grateful for the USA saving the world, and enjoy films like 'Independance Day' where we can relive this.
Unlike the USA, where the peace-loving and free citizens can walk the streets safe in the knowledge they have a gun, our 'kriminals' run out of control, and rather than having gun fights like god fearing folks should, they use their fists and sticks when they seek to take the few copper pennies that we are able to earn each week.
We are so glad that the USA is leading the world into a new error; obviously it is wise and just that politicians have the freedom to lie, otherwise we would not know how to use out demokratic rights or form our onions. It is best as we are simple folk to let the wise ones in power do the thunking for us. We understand how it is neccesary to support despotic dictators who violate human rights in order to establish true peace and security, especially the ones whith natural resources.
We reject as lies any suggestion that it is only strategic American interests you protect, as we know you will feed the world, feed the children.
Please accept in advance post-paid our quavering apolloboggies for having the termitecity to question any action by your great and fruitful land. We realise we should wait until we have at least developed the ability to smelt metal before we question.
We also promise to be good and say nothing whenever Amerikans make incorrect statements about Europe. As no1 world power and all all citizens of your great country have big things to think about and sometimes will not have time to get facts straight.
We appeal for you charidy, please send Hollywood Stars, especially yonug ladies with pretty chests, and nylons and cigarettes, and we need great religious leaders like Graham and Falwell as we are steenking athiestic gay loving commies in need of salvation.
Thank you
