I Just Don't "Fit" Anywhere!

by pettygrudger 57 Replies latest jw friends

  • obiwan
    obiwan

    I went on to have 5 kids of my own........no quiet time for me!

    Sounds like you had couple of minutes of free time.lol Sorry, I just couldn't resist.

  • cat1759
    cat1759

    Good thread Pettygrudge,

    I have felt that way all my life and it was not due to the JWS upbringing. I was always the odd one. It makes for more exciting learning.

    Ok, so maybe I never learned the social skills of kissing major a-- in order to fit in but what the heck. I like my own ideas.

    If no one understands that is fine with me, sometimes I don't understand me. Then the aha moment light shines and I remember who I am.

    Every once in awhile I actually fit in, albeit in my family but hey they understand.

    Cathy

  • bikerchic
    bikerchic

    obwian!

    Sounds like you had couple of minutes of free time.lol Sorry, I just couldn't resist.

    Bawhahaaaaaaaaa! Guess I laid around to much.......... I couldn't resist either, LOL

    Kate

  • BeautifulGarbage
    BeautifulGarbage

    Petty,

    I could have written your post and I’m blown away by this thread. So many of the same thoughts have gone through my mind. Usually, I just conclude that I am somehow defective and just not born with the ability to make friends easily. I’m just too odd and a freak. I’m also uncomfortable around big groups of people and tend to be an observer.

    My younger sister is similar in personality to me, but has the ability to make friends easily. Though, she didn’t have the JW experience growing up that I had, she still came from the same insane mixed-up family as me. I admire her social ease. I seem to be able to relate to people better one on one. But, it’s hard, being a middle-aged housewife (most women with kids the same age as mine are much younger), who likes to read and keep up with current events, knows who her congressperson and senators are, has unusual views on various topics, who can have a snide sense of humor, to meet people that I can connect with on a meaningful level. Not just gossip about other people.

    You know what I always wished they had? Well, you know how there are websites for meeting singles? I wish there were websites for making friends that were similar: “Hi, I’m in my 30’s, married with a couple kids, I was raised JW, but now am an ex…Looking for a friend to meet for coffee at least once a week and maybe some shopping, who would like to talk about life the universe and everything! Someone who could crack me up when I am feeling down and I could do the same for them. Someone who thinks ‘The Princess Bride’ is a funny movie. Someone who does not let their kids play ‘Grand Theft Auto 2’. If this sounds like you, lets have coffee!”

    Lisa,

    I think you have a great idea about a website. The Grand Theft Auto 2 sentence jumped out at me. I work at my son’s elementary school, when it’s in session, a few hours a day. I have heard little kids talking about playing this game all the time. Some will even talk about how their parents will allow them to watch the Playboy channel. Makes me want to head smack the parents. I try to monitor what games my kids play, and what TV shows they watch.

    Petty, and to everyone who shared on this thread, thanks.

    And, Welcome No one!

  • no one
    no one

    Lisa,

    Your poem broke my heart. I hope you are not thinking of suicide!

    I'm glad you liked the poem. It is very uncomfortable sharing it because it is so personal to me. Perhaps in putting it out there, someone else may be able to relate to it as not being the only one who feels this way... or they may take it too literally to heart that they truly don't belong here.

    For some of us, suicide is like alcoholism. We face it every day. We have to decide every day not to kill ourselves. To quote a line from "Little Big Man": Today is a good day to die.

    Having a mate makes it easier. She keeps me alive. As long as she lives, I live.

  • Jessica Rabbit
    Jessica Rabbit

    Petty,

    Looks like if we all lived a little closer to each other you would've titled this thread "I love this Clique of mine"!! I feel just like you. It hurts sometimes when I try to fit in and never say the right thing. I appreciate you sharing your feelings on this. I've wanted to bring up the subject before but never know what people will think. I don't want to come across as throwing myself a pity party. It's nice to know I'm not the only one going through this.

    JR

  • no one
    no one

    Thanks, Andee.

  • onacruse
    onacruse

    obiwan, yeah, and I inherited all those kids, and their kids, and nephews, uncles, nieces, brothers...gosh, to think that my life was so simple. Now I have such an extended family, Kate has to give me a test every month: holds up pictures, and says "Now, who's this? And who's this? And..." LOL

    Craig (of the "back to fitting in" class)

  • Guest 77
    Guest 77

    Countrygirl, you hit the nail on the head. Nothing more to add or subtract, life is there for us to reach out, just reach out. Some good will always come out of something negative.

    Guest 77

  • Hapgood
    Hapgood

    (((Pettygrundger))) I've always enjoyed your posts!

    From all the responses to your post there is alot of us in the same boat. All my life I've always felt like a square peg trying to fit in a round hole. I'm kind of a loner. Now that I left the jws, I don't have one friend. I still have my family (non jws), for which I am so thankful.

    Your lucky that you have your husband and kids. My husband is still a JW, well we just aren't as close anymore, it's almost that he looks at me in disdain for having left the JWs.

    (((Hugs to all us oddballs)))

    Hapgood

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