Wanna see me stick my foot in my mouth? Its a question for you women,

by William Penwell 78 Replies latest jw friends

• 

  Nosferatu

  You want an explanation on the whole "nice guy" vs "jerk", then here's one:

  Women don't go for the nice guys (or they dump them) because they are incredibly predictable and BORING. There is absolutely no challenge when a guy gives into a woman's every request.

  Women are attracted to jerks because they are exciting and unpredictable. She has absolutely no clue what he's going to do next, and this creates an emotional excitement. He has the ability to say "NO" to a woman.

  Women develope attraction for men who take them on an emotional rollercoaster ride. Nice guys keep them on an emotional ride across the prairies - in other words, they work hard to keep them on the same level emotionally. Absolutely no excitement.
• 

  Red Witch

  How about this? When I got FREE, I played with all kinds of men, "HA" to the preppy college kid. And I gravitated to the more exciting bad boy, but on my terms as I was the one emotionally unavailable therefore we both had good times. But when I was ready for a partner, I simply wanted someone I was sexually attracted to, could take care of me emotionally, physically, and was head over heals in love with me. The trick to finding someone like that, Mr Penwell, was to not look and give it up to the powers that be, as you do not seem to be making good choices. Have a good talk with whomever your God(s)/Goddess(es) are and sit back and relax. It will happen. I speak from much experience, trust me
• 

  Valis

  the probelm is, the bad ones don't start out bad, they start out nice. once they've got you, their true not-so-nice- colors start seeping out.

  hiya tink...love the new avatar BTW...I think this could be said for both sexes....I think its called "Meeting The Ambassador" syndrome...

  Sincerely,

  District Overbeer
• 

  tinkerbell82

  valis, i fully agree with you. women can be equally as capable as men of being deceptive in the early stages of a relationship. i can't speak about it from experience though, so i let it lie. 'meeting the ambassador'...nice...im'a write that one down....:P

  oh, and thanks, dr helped me with the av. :)
• 

  William Penwell

  Hey tinkerbell,

  I told you I would stick my foot in my mouth. LOL

  Will
  
  
  
• 

  William Penwell

  Then Nosferatu,

  Women are attracted to jerks because they are exciting and unpredictable. She has absolutely no clue what he's going to do next, and this creates an emotional excitement. He has the ability to say "NO" to a woman.

  Then don't complain when you get stuck with a loser!!! Growing up as a dub you were trained to be very approval seeking type of person. I have learned in the last 9 years to be more assertive than I was. As far as the niceness goes, oh well thats the way I am there is nothing I can do about it. I just have to learn to work with it so that people don't take advantage of my kindness.

  Will
• 

  William Penwell

  Again Stacey,

  Don't complain when you get stuck with a loser/user.

  Will
• 

  William Penwell

  Hi Red witch

  I have to come clean here myself. After I split with my ex, I was seeing a lady off and on that was completely opposite to my ex. Where as my ex was a "good squeaky clean dub", this friend was a real party animal type. I know a physiologist at the time said this was normal being in a controlling relationship to gravitate to someone that was the complete opposite. He said I would eventually balance my expectations and find someone that was kind of in the middle of the two. Anyway it didn't last too long as I came to realize that there was no future in a relationship with her.

  Will
• 

  William Penwell

  Hey Tinkerbell,

  I am not saying its just women but men are just as guilty with the mind games.

  Will
• 

  Robdar

  They say they want a nice guy who treats them well and gives them their space. Well so far with my experience if you treat them that way, all they do in return is lead you on, treat you like crap, play mind games and when someone else better comes along they dump you!!! Then they turn around and blame it all on you!!! I hear so much from them about how creepy their ex's were but it makes me wonder if there is two sides to the story...I can now understand why a lot of men play the games back, although that isn't my style. Well like they say what comes around, goes around. Anyway all the best to everyone here

  (((((Will)))))

  It sounds as if you have been put through the ringer. I apologize for the bad treatment that you have received from the women that you have dated.

  I can't speak for all women, but I do want a nice, good, sweet man. In my past, I could never seem to find one located close enough to start a relationship with.

  Most women do want the things that you state. They also want a little excitement. Someone a little unpredictable but in a nice way. The thing to do is not to be too sweet in the beginning. Hold some in reserve. Make them work a little bit for your affection. A woman is not going to appreciate that which she doesn't have to work for.

  There are a lot of single, straight, guys out there and they all want a girlfriend. Unfortunately, women are used to admiration and expect it as their due.

  Surprise them a little bit. Let them work for your affection. Don't be mean, but don't go out of your way to overwhelm them either. Allow them to get to know you better and vice versa before giving your heart to them.

  I hope that this info helps you in your search for a good woman. There are some out there. Be of good faith and keep on looking. It is, afterall, a numbers game.

  Love,

  Robyn