my heart hurts. (page 5)

SLOAN

(((((((((((((((((((Flower))))))))))))))))))))) We all feel alone sometimes. But you seem to have many friends here, don't forget that!!

franklin J

flower,

As you can see, you are not alone. We have all been there. It does get better. Do not give up!

We are all here for you....

Frank

Flower, I have not read all the replies here but the ones I did read were so inspiring. Take heart and go out there and have some fun. Volunteer at a center of your choosing. Meet other people who need a smile from your face. See how just a little bit of kindness from you shines in their eyes. If you have a child take the child to a local ymca. Volunteer there to help out with the children. My eldest son does this and he loves it. Life will change. It never stays stagnant for long. Good luck in your endevours. You are just facing a challenge that you will realize how strong you really are and how far you have come. Without the challenges we might never know how strong we really are inside. Cathy

UpAndAtom

I dont believe in God for the most part. But at times like this I have to wonder if I have truly pissed God off from a very young age and have been doomed to live out this existance as a punishment.

God is love, mercy and forgiveness, not punishment. Jesus is the good Shepard and loves and takes care of his flock. If you are feeling lost, you need only call on him for help. He can hardly help you, if you do not seek it.

Imagine this, Jesus the loving and good Shepard is watching over his flock. A little lamb (ie. you) wanders off and gets into trouble.. soon you find yourself alone, scared and unsure of where your future is. When Jesus hears your bleats for help he leaves the 99 sheep that have not wandered anywhere, and comes looking for you.

This parable as told in the Bible, is a loving story. On the other hand, the Jehovah's Witnesses would have you believe that it's the responsibility of the little lamb to find the Shepard, however this is not what scripture teaches. If you listen to the Jehovah's Witnesses too much, they'll have you believing that the good Shepard carries a double-barrel shotgun, and will shoot wayward sheep on sight!

I believe very strongly that you are a lost sheep. I believe you were lost from the day you were born and you don't know why. I believe you will be lost until the day you die - unless you do something about it - anything, but please do something. I suggest moving to another state, getting a new job and helping those people less fortunate than yourself (even if you just sponsor a single child in a 3rd world country), and most importantly treat other people as you would like to be treated. I sence something about you... pm me to find out more.

Sentinel

..........well honey, "feeling like crap" for any length of time, means you are either physically ill, or you have depression. As long as you've got a handle on things, you'll be fine. We all get down sometimes.

HadEnuf

Ahhhhhhhhhhhh (((((((Flower)))))))....I feel bad along with you! I don't really have any friends outside of my husband and kids...and I get lonesome too for friendship outside of my family...but when I get down I just get on this site and see all the familar names and feel better because I know that I do have friends...even though I have never met them in person.

I truly hope that somewhere, someplace you will find friends who are true and special and love you. You have many of those friends here I know. Cathy L.

Sassy

Flower , I'm sorry I am slow in responding in this thread, but I wanted to take time to read your words and thoughts and post with care so I saved it to read until now. My heart goes out to you just as it does the others. I'm pretty much going through withdrawals from loss of family and friends recently, so I know how it is. And work doesn't find close friends for me either. I have cultivated a few friendships but they are not the depth of the kind of friendships I would like to have. I'm new to this area so, the culture is different, people are different, not like the people I knew at work back home. I know your sisters response to you hurts the most. It would me.

I really admire that you joined that writing group and that you are sticking it out, even though the people are a bit stuffy and not what you had hoped. Perhaps in time they will change OR someone really nice will join the group that you can become life long friends with!

Hang in there..

ps. I just loved what your son said about what he was going to do with his light saber.. adorable!

Tatiana

(((((((((flower)))))))))

flower

ps. I just loved what your son said about what he was going to do with his light saber.. adorable!

I know hes too cute! I wish I had a recorder around all the time you wouldnt believe some of the things this kid says. Hes so smart for his age...its really amazing to me.
Thanks for the input all. Good to know so many can relate to my feelings. I appreciate the feedback..truly.
flower
ps..i dont believe in god ok?. deal w/it!

gti2002

Flower,

So sorry for you, I have never met people who claim christianity as their personal territory and yet behave so absolutely appallingly.

The people you miss aren't real, they couldn't possibly treat another human being that way if they were. Maybe they will become real if they ever get their heads out of the sand but until they do they are more like 'Stepford' beings. Your situation sounds hard but the only thing I can guarantee is that this time next year everything will be different, don't go back, fight through it - daylight is just around the corner, hang in there.

my heart hurts.