Welcome to the board Big Shooter.
Your story makes me realise how lucky I was not to have ever been baptised. I am 3rd generation and made the mistake of introducing my new wife to the Troof and have ended up surrounded by JW family, my kids and all.
At 52 years I have only just realised that it is not the Troof and I am not the sinner they pretended I was. I missed out on the shunning by not getting baptised. I knew I could never be good enough, so I just didn't do it. I didn't want to be DFd.
That doesn't mean I am out of the crap though, as my family know that I am now thinking their FDS are a bunch of scheming, lying bastards with the guidance system of a headless chicken.
You sound like you are going to make a good Dad and husband to me, and you won't need a WT crutch to help you. As you have discovered, they offer you a crutch and then kick it out from under you every time you really need it anyway.
Christian love to you and your family
Chris
blacksheep
Sorry I pirated your username, I never checked