by Big Shooter 108 Replies latest watchtower beliefs
Welcome to the board Big Shooter!!!
Wow, your life story really pulled at my heart. You have went thru so much pain. The lack of love was so abundant in your life. You have come to the right place to receive the unconditional love that you so deserve.
Congratulations on your marriage and your child!!!
Hugs,
Codeblue
WELCOME Big Shooter and Mrs Big Shooter!
I read your posts with much interest and can feel the pressure you're living under. As far as going to that dratted assembly, you can always say that Mrs. Big Shooter isn't feeling well that morning(s), and that you need to be there to care for her and your little one---to make sure she gets some rest.
If they're not satisfied with that-----TOUGH! And YOU get that weekend to be by yourselves without anybody hassling you cuz they'll ALL be AT the assembly!!! YAY!!!
I'm sorry for all you've been through, but glad the scales have fallen off your eyes and you ARE here at a VERY good place!
I'm going now to send you a PM...
hugs,
Annie
it's so weird.. this is such a terrifying experience to post these things, but its such a relief at the same time. I dont think Jehovah wants us to worship him with these feelings...
Hi Shooter.
Everyone here understands what you are feeling and many went through similar, unreal, unloving ,hatefull treatment at the king dumb hall.
It is obvious to me that both you and your wife are fine young people and deserve peace and contentment in your lives and those of your children.
When you screwed up, you behaved like a man and hid nothing. Your wife is loving enough to take you back. That says a lot for her.
In my life, I had to finally take the stance, that those who brought grief, sadness, anger and other negative emotions into my life, had to stop doing this or I would detatch and forbid any more contact.
This was the final action I took, after trying other ways to have a normal relationship.
This is your and your wifes life and you will never relive these early years in your marriage. Don't let the nonsense and bitterness of others saturate your families life.
The cognitive dissonance "mental confusion" caused by this cult, creates a lot of anger in people that they are not aware of, or its source. If you observe closely, you may see this in your father and others. This is the cause of some of the angry hatefull conduct of these people. They are angry at everything. Themselves, each other and especially those who do not conform.
We do not need this sort of thing brought into our families.
Welcome Shooter. May you find all the love, kindness and happiness this world has to offer. It is out there and just waiting for you.
Outoftheorg
I dont think Jehovah wants us to worship him with these feelings...
better yet, do you want to worship something that make you feel that way?
Sincerely,
District Overbeer
Welcome to the board Big Shooter and wife!
Your story was a real heart tug for me to read. My oldest son was DF'ed years ago and I absolutely decided I would not shun him, in fact it was a real eye opener to me and allowed me to soften my attitude towards others who were DF'ed, no more shunning for me!
My son was a gift, I prayed to have him and there was no god or organization that would ever be able to take that gift from me as long as I was alive!
I know that worshiping the true God should NOT feel like this...
For my own personal experience it was exactly what you wrote above that took me out of the B'org. Not the religious stuff because for a long time I actually thought JW's were the true religion. It was the lack of love that took me out. The rest of the "stuff" or as we like to say the "truth" about the troof? came later. Now I see it as nothing more than a publishing company and a cult one I'm glad to be out of and will encourage others to leave as well.
You sound like you've done a lot of growing up and facing things in your short life. I wish you the very best in your journey out.
Hugs!
Kate
True enough... I mean, like I said, I do agree with the principles, and the fact that we do have a Creator. But... I'm sorry, but I guess I was just never a good "head" of the household. I was never able to keep up a regular family study every week, do 1/2 hr bible reading every day, watchtower, ministry school, college, work, wife, child!!! and i would sit there at the assembly, and here the expereinecs of the model family, every one of their kids are pioneers, they do their text every morning, study every publication out there.. i tried that!! i tried everything! and i couldnt do it!! and i felt like a complete failure not doing it!! i'm sorry, but if we are doing a volunteer work, why do we have to record every single thing every month? isnt that for show???i am sure not everyone is honest about their quota of hours every month!!
Big so true it is volunteer work! I never thought about it like that before.........so why all the record keeping! LOL
i am sure not everyone is honest about their quota of hours every month!!
I actually had a very respected elder tell me that everyone who is living a good life and a JW in their community could with a clean conscience count at least one hour of time a month even if they did no field service! Hey it worked for me! So you are right, not everyone is honest about their field service reports.
Kate
The idea of turning in time became repulsive to me. If it is meant to be a service to Jehovah, then turning in time only enters in the fear of man. Service to Jehovah is meant to be a personal experience between you and God, not to be reported about in quantities to others.
Welcome Big Shooter !!
This one thing you said jumped out:
Your future and the future (s) of your children do not have to equal your past... all my life, the pressure.
Stick around. You and your wife will find an enormous amount of genuine support and understanding here and the folks who have been in your shoes can help guide you out.
Best of luck to you !!
XW
