Gay Lesbian,Bisexual JW's : is there space for us? (please no bashing) (page 3)

SC_Guy

To be or not to be, not sure what encouragment I can provide to you beyond what as already been said. However, I sorda know what your going though being a gay teenager still within the b0rg... and it's tough, real tough. Things'll get better though... Once you come to a understanding that there isn't a devine being out there hating you because you are gay/bi/st8. If you ever wanna talk, PM me... be glad to help you along if you need such assitance. Cheers!

SC Guy

Undaunted Danny

Welcome,the hospitality is reciprocal you host straight friends at your home. :

FOR OUR STRAIGHT FRIENDS
This forum is especially for our heterosexual friends to ask questions, comment, and interact with us. Moderated

Abaddon

to be or not

You've survived being raised in a cult.

Yup. A cult.

The first thing you have to realise is that religionists have one thing in common. They cannot prove they have god's word. They all say they have, and point to history or books or whatever as 'proof', but they can't really prove anything.

If there ever WAS a good old days, when one could tell who was with god by the fact they raised the dead or parted seas, it has gone now.

Now we have to use our minds to find truth.

Firstly, truth need not hide. Cults work by controlling the information you receive, either directly (commune-style cults) or by conditioning (like JWs).

You are conditioned to reject material that contradicts what you have been taught in the meetings; not to examine it carefully and see where the truth of the matter lies, but just to reject it. Anything that is 'apostate' is seen as the most evil thing, but all apostate means is disagreeing with. In the JW's if you disagree you are punished; you have little if no freedom of conscience in determining your activities

To come here is to go aganst that fear they've developed in you, and you should be very proud you're able to get this far on your own.

Secondly, you have the rest of your life ahead of you. As with many cults, JWs predict the end of the world. Nothing like the fear of destruction to keep people in line. The JWs have said the end should be here in 1975, by the end of the 20th Century, they have changed the meaning of the word 'generation' to keep people in check. Take your time in figuring out what to do, there will be a tomorrow.

Thirdly, scientists now feel that very often homosexuality is a genetic leaning. If this is so (and there's fairly good evidence supporting it), can you imagine god punishing someone for having genes that made them gay? It would be like punishing someone for having genes that gave them curly hair.

In short, don't fear making a thorough investigation of things; you have time and reason to. And don't let your conflict over your sexuality make you assume you are anything other than a "child-of-god", as much as the next person, as much as me, even as much as those who judge you on this thread, although I'd far rather have you at my dinner table than them.

I personally feel if there is any truth in Jesus' message, then the bias against homosexuality was tacked onto Chritianity as it existed in the culture Christianity arose from. Look at the Mosaic Law; women are viewed as inferior and unclean... is that really god's opinion, or the understanding of a bronze-age culture being attributed to god?

Likewise the liberating message of love Jesus has, would people who were homosexual due to their genes be considered unable to receive or share love? Would that be fair? Or is it again, a cultural belief tacked onto the message Jesus bought.

If we are made in god image, then our intuitions in such matters can guide as to truth, or at least to our own truth.

Oh, I think the acting classes thing was a joke about making sure you don't get caught out by acting straight; you may well be a straight acting gay guy anyway, as survival would make this a neccesity in the Kingdum Hole.

Anyway, my love and best wishes to you. You really should look these people up;

http://www.gayxjw.org/acbsf/sfindex.html

It is an organisation specifically for gay Witnesses and x-Witnesses, and if I'm not mistaken a guy I've known online for a good few years now (John Wirtanen) heads up that chapter. Even if it isn't geographically close to you, I can't think of a better person for you to ask some of the questions you have.

Gyles

scotsman

Hi To Be

You've already had a lot of good advice. I'd also recommend just not bothering to think about any of it for a while. Take 6 months off any self analysis. Armageddon won't be here tomorrow and old age won't catch you over the summer either. If your family have slacked off being Witnesses and you haven't been to a meeting for a year then switch the Witness static off.

Try just being you. We're all here for you. You've got the rest of your life to answer those questions.

Bubbamar

HI To Be

I feel for you so much and wish I could give you hug and tell you that everything will be okay. I think if you keep seeking you will eventually KNOW that for yourself though. I am gay and and ex-jw (df'ed) and I know that God loves me and that I am okay in his eyes. One of the ways I experience God's love is through other people and the grace I experience in my life. However, this NEVER happened in the JW's -- I was judged and kicked to the curb. How Christlike, eh?

I am reading the Ray Franz book - Crisis of Conscious. I highly recommend it. I wonder if anyone could read it and still be a JW. Its very telling of the hypocracy and hogwash that exists at the top of the organization. It also makes it very clear that the ~~religion~~ is a mad-made and man-controlled organization with very little scriptural basis for their doctrines. But be careful- - reading the book will mean to the JW's that you are an apostate.

Please keep us posted and let us know how you are doing!

Hugs

ohiocowboy

Hi there, and WELCOME!!! I am another Gay person that has benefitted from this site. You obviously have big challenges ahead of you, and it will not be easy, but please do not let the guilt get to you. (Yes, easier said than done, but a LOT of us have been there!) Things will eventually get better. In regards to the parents, I can't say what will happen, as they are all different. Unfortunately, my situation did not work out very well, but other people who have come out, still have parents that love them no matter what. They may not agree with what they do, but realize that it is still their child. Unless you are willing, and are able to deny your feelings regarding being gay, and live a life with no sex-this includes masturbation, please do NOT get baptized. It will only compound the problems several-fold! Step back and look at the big picture, and decide what you want to do. It is your life, and your decision. Search your heart, and you will find answers. Another thing that I wish I would have done earlier, as it would have helped me sort things out would have been to see a professional at an earlier age. Unfortunately, you are going to have a lot of stress, and maybe it would be good to get help with your emotions. There are a lot of us on anti-depressants, and believe me, they do help. My friends notice big differences in me, as compared to not taking them. Paxil, Zoloft, Prozac, or one of the other NON-ADDICTIVE anti-depressants can work wonders, and help a person see more clearly, thereby enabling them to Rationally face very difficult times, and challenges. Please remember there are people here that understand, and do really care, as many of us are, and have been in the "Same Boat". One final note, Sexual identification does not make one Bad, or Evil. As long as you do good to others, that is what matters!! Glad to have you here!!!

franklin J

Hi to be,

welcome to the forum ; you are among friends here.

You have had much good advice in the above threads; especially from Scotsman. Chill. Take the summer off to just reflect and be you. It will all still be there in September.

I might add one additional thought for you to consider. You have your entire life in front of you. Despite what ever you have been taught by the JWs about schooling; it is important ... Higher Education is a key to your future that you should consider. It is as important as anything else you might do for yourself. Give it some thought. Remember---you alone control your destiny.

We are all here for you,

Frank

The Angry Atheist

as tuff as it is....... the j-dog ( that invisable man who lives in the sky and demands eternal slavery) he dont love ya. -as joe stallin said. "kill one man and it is terrible, kill one million men and it is a statistic." when the "end" comes and its time for the killing, will you be a statistic or a person. - does it matter? if there really is a god then there will only be about nine people who ge reserected. those rules are tuff and unforgiving. its a circle, bra. step out of it.

Sassy

You've got great advice here.. I for one hate when any bashing happens and you won't get it from me..

I was out of posts when you first put this thread up.. so forgive me for being so late to say hi..

ApagaLaLuz

jgnat left you a great link:

We have people of all sorts here. We try to play nice for the most parts. Sometimes someone gets bashed, then teh rest of us usually bash teh basher, and everyone is happy in the end. I too was out of post yesterday when you posted. Just wanted to say

WELCOME!!!!!

Gay Lesbian,Bisexual JW's : is there space for us? (please no bashing)

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