Hey All,
Ok...I know for a fact that you have all probably heard this before but I am new here so I don't really know all the topics that have been discussed. So, at the risk of repeating past topics.....here I go...
I am 16 years old and have a boyfriend who is a JW. We have been together for 1 year and 4 months now and I know we are young but you can't possibly understand how mature our relationship is for our age and how much we really do love each other. I mean, aside from the religious differences, everything is....well....perfect! (I am a catholic btw) ... He has met all of my family numerous times (well, the ones I most assoiciate with myself) and they all ADORE him. I on the other hand have only met his Mom, Dad and 2 younger syblings once. He has one older sybling who shyed away from the religion and I met her through school coz she went to the same school as us. None the less, I met his Mom Dad and 2 syblings when I decided to go to a meeting with them one sunday. It was around Easter and even though it has nothing to do with that coz they do not celebrate holidays, i guess the Kingdom Hall does something where people that go there can bring non-JW friends or family with them to sort of let them see what its like. I figured, what the heck...I'll go and meet the family, maybe make a good first impression so they will feel more comfortable with our relationship and get to see what their religion is really like. I mean I hear ALL these horrible things about it from other people but good things from my b/f and I wanted to see first hand what it was like. Well, I gotta say that it wasn't that bad. I mean...it reminded me of regular church minus the songs and the wooden benches (not that I even go to church anymore, but I remember from when I used to) and everyone was very nice and everyone seemed to get along great. As for his family, I never got to speak to his father coz he helped patrol parking in the parking lot so he was busy both at the begining and the end of the "services" but he seems really easy going. His mom, was nice but you can tell that you don't want to be on her bad side and she seemed a little...strict. I had a few laughs with his sister and didn't really talk to his brother (he seemed shy). Moving on though...we have talked so much about getting married an everything and it all sounds great till we get to the part where we have to decide how we are going to handle the religious stuff. I mean my family doesn't care about the religious differences at all. Obveously, his parents do...ALOT, For the longest time they were actually taking his cellphone away from him at night to make sure he wasn't calling me. They don't now, but he still has to be careful of when he calls me coz they can't catch him on the phone with me. And we are never allowed see each other out side of school. Now, it turns out that its not only the family that has a problem with it, but his freinds too! His close friends basically told him to choose either them and the religion or me. As i am sure you already know, he can't really hang out with non-JW as friends either so those are the only friends he has. I finally agreed to start studying. He has already told me that if I am doing it for him not to even bother. I am not going to say that that is not part of the reason why I am doing it....a BIG part but I also kinda wanna do it for me. I mean, as of right now I am a catholic but I don't go to church and I am not very religious so who knows, it may be good for me. I think it'd help me to have something to believe in and it sure would make it alot easier on us. So, he talked to his mom about it and she said she'd study with me. I talked to my mom about it and she said that its my decision but she isn't backing this up and wants nothing to do with it. She doesn't want to be around when I am doing it and doesn't even wanna see his mother. its so tough coz my family REALLY doesn't want me to. And just coz I am studying doesn't mean I am definatly going to become a JW....I am just staying open minded and feeling out my options. Who knows, I may like it and I am sure it is better to practiuce some religion than none at all. I mean JW's and Catholics both look up to the same god, except JW's just follow the bible more closly by doing everything it says. And I have comparied the bibles myself and they are both exactly the same....just theirs is more modernized (I know there are rumors that their bible is different so i checked for myself.) Now, I don't know what to do though. I feel like I am disappointing my family and I don't want that. I am seriously thinking about converting though as long as the studying goes well and I don't know how I would break that to the family if I decided to in the end. Not to mention that I hear all these bad things about the religion and while I may not agree with every asspect of it, it can't be that bad...right? I mean there are so many people born into the religion that lead happy lives. So please, I could really use some feedback on what I should do about my family, my boyfriend, his family and my own decision! Anything.....And please, if anyone has anything positive to say I would appreciate it coz I know I am going to get A TON of posts saying to leave him and stay away from him. I really don't want that though and thats not really an option so other advice would be great.
I hope ya didn't fall asleep reading all that! Thanks though.