My story, please read (page 5)

fairchild

Frenchbabyface, thanks for the welcome! Smiles to you.

Your comment really made me think. No, I have not harmed anyone at all. Actually you made me realize that it is not my situation in itself that is against bible princilpes, it is rather the result of that situation which is.

For example (this is just an example, I don't drink alcohol at all) The bible does not have the slightest thing against the drinking of alcohol, on the contrary. But it would be very wrong to be drunk 24/7. So it wouldn't be the alcohol that's wrong, but the result of drinking alcohol : being drunk. I hope this makes sense, as I don't have any other way of explaining.

fairchild

Hi gypsywildone,

Sigh, I'm afraid to have been disappointed by people too many times to really believe that. But to me, there is much joy in many things that are not related to people perse. I deal with the sad things of this world (deceit, poverty, loss, etc..) in my own way, by writing poetry about it.

Joy, to me, is seeing my cat playing a new toy, watching the stars at night, or climb up the gravel pit in the woods behind my place and watch the sun go down.

fairchild

Hi pennycandy,

Wow, you said that well! Who doesn't know about the guilt? It is true that the requirements are so high, unless you are occupied with serving every waking minute, there is some guilt involved. I never thought about it that way, but my best friend -who is baptized- often talks about guilt, and she is a regular pioneer.

From what I gather, you still worship? I really would like to hear more about that. Like how do you get rid of your guilt, and in what way do you worship?

Thank you so much for stopping in.

fairchild

Hi jgnat,

Thank you for the link and for the advice. Got to admit, I have done more than my share in searching, and these have been my thoughts exactly at amny times.. if I search long enough and sincerely, then God will help me to find Him. Strangely, I always end up at a kingdom hall somewhere, even after a few detours to various churches..

fairchild

Hi bebu,

Yeah, I try to answer everyone individually, people deserve that when they take the time to read my story and talk to me.

Your reply brought a smile to my face. Yes, I totally agree that all aspects should be considered. That is one of several reasons why I am on this site. Here, I will find people who have left the organization for one reason or another, and I owe it to myself to hear their voices as well. (Only hoping that it won't start confusing me tooooo much)

Thank you for popping in and have a nice evening.

Fleur

hi again fairchild,

I just wanted to clarify in light of grannylinda's post that I wasn't suggesting that anybody post any deep dark secrets on the open forum. I was just trying to say that no matter what a person is going through, that there is someone else out there who has been through it too, so you wouldn't feel down on yourself, whatever the issue is.

You seem to be on the right track, just keep reading, asking questions, and you will find your way.

have a good evening!

essie

fairchild

Thank you for coming back, Fleur. Oh this site is quite interesting, I've been doing a lot of reading tonight. I didn't think you were suggesting to post any secrets here, don't worry. Sometimes I wonder if there is really someone else out there who has been through the same thing, but I highly doubt it, it is kind of unique. It would be nice though, because then I could ask them how they dealt with it and if there is a solution in the long run.

So far, this site has been an interesting journey to me.

AlanF

Hi fairchild,

You've made quite a step in posting to this board, given what you've said about your circumstances and your like of the JW take on the Bible. So I'll give you my opinion on a few things. I promise you -- I won't hold back from saying what I think.

You seem to be confusing the JWs with the Bible. They are not the same -- not by a long shot. The Governing Body certainly claims to speak in God's name, but actions speak louder than words. A long association with the JW organization has shown me that these men's actions shout Hypocrisy! Some examples:

While on the one hand JW leaders long condemned the United Nations and anyone associated with it, when it suited their convenience they joined their organization to the U.N., beginning with a 1991 Awake! article that, to anyone but a JW, seemed to heap praise on the U.N. They petitioned the U.N. to become an "Associated Non-Governmental Organization" (NGO) in order to obtain, they claim -- of all things -- a library card. To do this they had to produce at least one publication a year that supported all of the the U.N.'s goals. In doing this from 1991 through 2001, they, in their own published words, prostituted themselves to the U.N. They used their NGO status throughout the 1990s to obtain a hearing before various political bodies such as the European Court of Human Rights and the United States Congress, thereby becoming entangled in politics -- again something they condemn for all true Christians. Now, when asked about this by sincere JWs, they lie and claim that they only wanted a library card.

Beginning in the early 1990s, several good people at the Brooklyn headquarters of the Watchtower Society worked hard to change the JW organization's laissez faire attitude toward child molestation. They had an uphill battle because the leaders wanted very much to deny that the problem existed, much less do anything about it, and most of all they wanted to keep molestation victims quiet so as to protect their organization's name. The two sides battled, but finally a Watchtower article was published in early 1996 that acknowledged that abuse did indeed occur among JWs, and stated a policy that no one with a background of molesting children would ever serve in a position of responsibility. However, not long after that, the conservatives among JW leaders gradually began eating away at the good policy until it had no teeth, and things were back to the normal state of covering up abuse by JWs, especially by elders. In early 2001, the Silentlambs movement was born, and this exposed to the media the many abuses committed by JW leaders. Of course, the most prominent of those people were disfellowshipped around the time that the first TV coverage appeared. Why disfellowshipped? They were "causing divisions"! How can anyone who simply wants to protect children properly be accused of "causing divisions"? Isn't it evident that it was the hypocritical JW leaders who were "causing divisions" by sticking with an abusive policy and by abusing victims in court?

I suppose I could go on for a long time, but if you're interested in the facts about the JW organization, please do read the websites that other posters have suggested. Also check this one for a lot of in-depth information: http://www.geocities.com/osarsif/index2.htm

AlanF

NewLight2

fairchild,

I doubt that you are alone in your 'secret sin'. Why not try typing a one or two word description into a search engine - like google - and see what comes up. You just might find out that you are not alone after all. A word of caution - be careful who you discuss this personal situation with over the internet. I want to be clear that I'm NOT saying you should share this information with others on the net.

NewLight2

My story, please read

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