Are ex-jw's or "apostates" addicted to jw-bashing? (page 5)

steve2

When the Watchtower Society quits bashing apostates in print and during their assembly talks, I might think about it. Until then, I won't be hypocritical by claiming that their only purpose in life is their constant attacks on ex-JWs.

A cogent point Swan. It's a bit like an abusive parent whose child has left home bad-mouthing that child at every oportunity so that the other children don't think ill of the parent. Hey, parent: Look at your own behaviour if you want to begin to understand the behaviour of the child you've kicked out.

There are some who leave the organization and who never talk about it. The JWs must "love" this type of ex-JW. I must say that I am usually more concerned about these "quiet" ones. It could be that they are getting on with their lives and making the difficult adjustments - if indeed it is difficult for them. Then again, if they've been raised in the religion, they may continue to be controlled by negative emotions and creep around the earth like timid little mice waiting for the Big A to break out. I can't speak for these ex-JWs, but my impression would be that their ability to continue coping may be less developed than those ex-JWs who begin to open up and speak about their experiences. Yes, sometimes when we speak out, real deep emotions come out - and that is beneficial - goodness knows the emotions were stuffed down long enough when we were under the Watchtower's leaden control. As an earlier post said (Franklin, I think): It can be therapeutic to do so.

mama

I have gone weeks without jw bashing, but you'll never convince your mom of that. I have seen some ppl who are still bitter after a long time, but if you make a good life for yourself and enjoy life then it isn't an all incompassing obsession. The only ppl I feel are addicted to jwbashing are those still in a lot of pain from the hurt they suffered. Some have had very bad experiences. Some bash to justify their guilt cause somewhere in their minds they still hold on to some jw beliefs.I bash to vent.Everybody heals differently, in their own time and "bashing" or talking about these can be like going to a therapist or friend, you get it out of your system. I came here not to long ago, I have been out of the religion for about 2 years I guess. For me it is a place to discuss issues that ppl who have never been in the org. cannot understand. For instance, a friend recently asked me alot of questions about the jws and why i left, as i answered, i could see her eyes glaze over, she just doesn't get it. She doesn't understand how hard it was to leave or the control the org. has on you when your still in it. But ppl here do, its an outlet, that simple. Do I wake up thinking those damn witnesses, hell no, i wake up thinking, life is good.

one

I suppose if you are fortunate enough to still have a loving and supportive family and access to resources to help yourself heal,

family? what family?

resources? same as eveyone has here, internet.

Maybe the mistake is stereotyping people and assuming we know their reasons for what they do, when all we're doing is guessing.

We dont have to exactly know the "reasons", the point is the person is not balanced. AND whatever created the hurting situation, surely in MOST cases the indiviudal was part of the problem not just merely a powerless victim. Been there done that, more than once

On the other hand, are the JWs continually bashing the flock - Over meeting attendance, field service, blood etc?

just because they do it, it means it is appropriate or even good or neutral for our mental and physical health to do the same.

AND like i have said before it is the cycle that has to be broken at some point. A initial amount of bash can be understood.

The longer it takes the louder it speaks about our so call higher capacity and ability to scape, (did we really scape, or just changed position?)

many witnesses are having a hard time with abusive mates, mental and physical health problems - the list goes on

What is the point? as long as we live in this planet THAT is going to happen to anyone we know jw are not perfect and reason for leaving, they presented and WE pretended an eutopia. It SOUNDED good but lets get real and do our home work before jumping into anything else.

BTW once we are not under obligation to obey parents we could do our "home" work as deep and extensive as we can (could we?)

To what extent did we do our home work regarding jw before joining or after let's say we reached legal age.

Are we wiling to present a Harvard Diploma, with our name on it, to a prospective employer, even if legal, when we have not studied.

I bet most of us did not read the bible completly before we went knocking doors shouting we were MINISTERS and jw trying to TEACH others

then how could we know if jw were right?, if they lied we beleived the lie, so...

to give an example most jw i met could not explain "2520", then they walk out saying FDS is bs, this and that, most of us not even attempted to figure out the central doctrine of jw, what THAT tells about us?

Out,

You mention about how "bashing" is a negative action. Perhaps you should begin to look at it from a more positive angle yourself. Why not encourage people to get their justified anger out in as neutral way as possible and also encourage them to build on creating a new, happier self.

Read ALL my previous post above, one them says: "you can still talk about the jw but in a "upbuilding" manner, in a way to get some value out of it."

Read the last two post on page 1 and the second post on page 2 and so on.

actually this very same post is to show ("encourage") that we need to be carefull when we decide anything, not to have to blame others in the future...

But if someone criticizes them they say "get a life."

At this point it is not what "they" (jw) say or do but what we here say or do.

In fact most of us are out because "we" think we know better than jw, but

CONTIUED bash does not show any difference between jw and us,."we"

seven006

I personally see myself as an equal opportunity basher. I bash rednecks, bigots, religious fundamentalist, republicans, and those who think the world wrestling federation is just another reality TV show. Basically I bash those who excel in stupidity and ignorance. The JW's have not yet raised their standards far enough to meet any of that criteria. I equate them with puppies and kitties who just don't know any better than to piss on the carpet and sniff each other's asses. But, I'm root'n for'em.

Dave

outbutnotdown

One,

I was trying to go about saying this in a positive way, indirect way, but you are proving, with your replies, that giving up "bashing" is not so easy as you say. I will make it a little more clear.

You are incessantly BASHING most of the people here, who in most people's opinion are simply expressing their feelings towards an organization that has had a VERY negative effect on them!

If you want to begin to express yourself in a more positive way, such as giving PRACTICAL advice to those who could use it, or showing some COMFORT before you bash, you might get a more open ear.

I, for one, don't really like your broad brushstrokes.

Brad

kaykay_mp

No. I think about other stuff, too.

Now, here's a topic: poop. Discuss. Talk amongst yourselves.

laters

kaykay_mp

Frannie Banannie

No, but jdubs are addicted to "apostate-bashing".

one

out,

"broad brushstrokes

and i was waiting for you to quote from my posts to prove your point, it will HELP me understand your point.

You are incessantly BASHING

if you think so, i am bashing myself too, i have been using "we", "us" more often

BTW I found it

bash, http://dictionary.reference.com/search?q=bash

To strike with a heavy, crushing blow: The thug bashed the hood of the car with a sledgehammer.
To beat or assault severely: The police arrested the men who bashed an immigrant in the park.
Informal. To criticize (another) harshly, accusatorially, and threateningly: ?He bashed the... government unmercifully over the... spy affair? (Lally Weymouth).

v. intr. Informal

To engage in harsh, accusatory, threatening criticism.

steve2

We dont have to exactly know the "reasons", the point is the person is not balanced. AND whatever created the hurting situation, surely in MOST cases the indiviudal was part of the problem not just merely a powerless victim. Been there done that, more than once

I have problems with this point of view because it assumes that the individual - "in MOST cases" to quote - was part of the problem not just a powerless victim. Who are you speaking for? Children raised in the religion who were born into an environment that rewards conformity and punishes self-initiative? And when you say the person is not balanced, who legitimised that imbalance in the first place? People in positions of power over the individual!

Even if a person has in some way contributed to the problem - and I concede you may have a really good point there - does that mean the individual cannot attempt to bring some balance back into his or her life by speaking out against the religious practices that increase the person's vulnerability to traumatic stress? Like you, I too have been there, done that!

Regarding my comment about some ex-JWs being fortunate enough to have supportive families: This is a protective factor and may actually help the individual come to terms more quickly with what they have been through. It certainly helped in my own case.

steve2

To engage in harsh, accusatory, threatening criticism.

One, you are absolutely correct! Using this definition, glance through the Watchtower magazine and see if you can find any non-bashing statements about "apostates".

Are ex-jw's or "apostates" addicted to jw-bashing?

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