How do you women feel about acting stupid to please men and the borg?

by Dragonlady76 97 Replies latest jw friends

  • jeanniebeanz
    jeanniebeanz

    Eduardo, that is the first heartfelt thing I have heard you say since we 'met'.

    Thanks.

    *jeannie backs off now*

  • Dragonlady76
    Dragonlady76

    Oroborus,

    Did you conveniently forget that you wrote this?

    How as I said, I am not saying that there are definite and big problems in the Org with gender inequality. I am quite feminist leaning in fact on future reform in that area and believe me I know many a sister that could deliver a better talk,
    I wouldn't say that I am a feminist but

    Looks like we have a classic case of circular reasoning here. So Eduardo which one is it?

    Dragonlady76

  • Oroborus21
    Oroborus21

    feminist leaning doesn't mean feminist. I am not a feminist:

    I am the big chauvinist pig but with a heart of gold

    Eduardo

  • purplesofa
    purplesofa

    All I can say..........after 17 years being divorced, praying (in tears sometimes) to marry a brother. All those years of being alone, playing dumb, smiling when you wanted to say F off, having my intelligence insulted, handling all those problems alone, warding off "worldly" men for a brother and told how Jehovah was making a special brother for me. Feeling like there was something so wrong inside of me and changing constantly. Having the very essence of what makes a woman so special taken away. (nothing surgical) Stifled is a better word. Suffocated. Death.

    I will be forever grateful my prayers were never answered.

  • talesin
    talesin
    On spiritual matters there is not much conflict in my family because my wife is not a JW. But let us say she was, then there may be some times that her and I may not agree on a spiritual matter. I see the bible saying basically establishing that it will break this "spiritual tie-breaker" by deferring to the Man. Sorry it has to be one way or another and we win. (Too bad, write the bible next time!)
    The problem is that we (JW) men (and not just us you know lots of people) tend to extend the Bible's viewpoint above to non-spiritual things and that gets us mostly in trouble and cause problems, although really SOMEONE HAS TO BE THE FINAL DECISION MAKER on non-spiritual matters (even if it a coin toss or arm wrestling match or rock/paper/scissors).

    I was being flip - yes, your humour was naked, but I found it to be quite juvenile and mocking. (see above for context)

    Sarcasm is veiled hostility, so I apologize.

    Now, to the point highlighted in yellow.

    I do not feel you are sorry. This is a passive-aggressive way of pretending to humour the opposing viewpoint while at the same time casually dismissing it by the use of deprecating humour.

    Red highlight.

    And why is that? If the Bible is the true and inspired word of g*d, and you (JW man) interpret it correctly, why would this get you in 'trouble' and 'cause problems'?

    t

  • Sunnygal41
    Sunnygal41
    Ahwell as a guy I cant really contribute a lot to this conversation. Yall Jezebel, Atilia, Jael, Deborah like ladys keep up the good work

    IP_SEC!

  • Dragonlady76
    Dragonlady76

    <----Does Victory laps around Eduardo!

    Never cross a Dragon!

    Dragonlady76

  • Oroborus21
    Oroborus21

    Talesin:

    Yellow Point: I am not being "passive-agressive" I am being straight up. When it comes to "spiritual decisions" in a household the Bible plainly states/implies via the headship arrangement that the man is the final decision maker. Nothing unclear about that.

    Red Point: The "trouble" isn't the bible. The Trouble is warped interpretation of the bible and extension of a scriptural principle into realms of life that are not spiritual. Beating your wife is not a spiritual activity! The bible's spiritual headship arrangement doesn't apply to non-spiritual situations or things. Unfortunately and this HAS OFTEN BEEN THE CASE IN THE ORGANIZATION I know, some have made the mistake and used this scriptural headship principle as an excuse and tried to extend it into the non-spiritual. This has often produced the kind of abusive situations and exploitative situations (and just plain idiotic situations of "lordship") that have no doubt and not unreasonably turned women/sisters off from the whole headship principle all together.

    But to deny the scriptural principle is to both deny scripture and to from a practical viewpoint "throw the baby out with the bathwater"

    With regards to who is the "final decision maker" in the home when it comes to non-spiritual things that is up to the individuals involved. Again the Bible DOES NOT establish some "tie-breaker" for the non-spiritual situation. But I say that there has to be some final decision maker. Some couples may make the man the "boss", others (most?!) may make the woman the "boss" and others may cut cards to break "tie-breakers" and sometimes you just alternate. Ok honey you win this one. Wow! you are going along with me, great let's buy the oceanfront property in Arizona (yeah but she will nag me and never let me forget it if it turns out badly!!!)

    -Eduardo

  • jeanniebeanz
    jeanniebeanz
    I am the big chauvinist pig but with a heart of gold

    yer gettin more honest by the moment there Ed. Well, kinda... LOL

    J

  • Oroborus21
    Oroborus21

    Oh Dragonlady, You know I am a dragon swallowing my own tale. Maybe we can help each other out?

    -Eduardo

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