What is you (or somebodies) best blooper in the KH? (page 2)

EvilForce

There was an older childless couple in the congo...he was probably 65 ish at the time and I think getting mentally ill. There was a local needs talk about something or other. This brother raises his hand and says "I'm tired of all these little ones running around the KH saying shit, damn, hell, f*^k, and other cuss words". The speaker was completely blown away.....as if he was thinking to himself "he didn't really just say that outloud did he?" LOL

Elsewhere

Well some (fun)'loving' youth decided to point out, just before he got up to give a public talk, that in the UK we didn't use the word 'awesome' , we use the word 'cr*p' to mean something really good and worthy of recognition. Bizarrely he accepted that without question. The end of his talk went somewhat like this..

lmao! Something tells me those kids will have "express" tickets to hell.

tijkmo

a circuit overseer was visiting a cong in hartlepool and spoke about the things jws kids have to put up with in school...name calling bullying etc

he said...our boys and girls are being called johovees and hovis witness etc etc

what else do you get called he asked the kids in the audience

one little boy put up his hand and in all seriousness said

they call me dickhead

well he did ask

purplesofa

they call me dickhead

hahahaha

A brother was having a hard time with a bible reading, stumbling over words terribly........we all had to hold back snickers when he said breasts for beasts.........then as the reading went on I know we all were waiting to hear how organism was going to come out............ohhhhhhh could it be orgasim????

well, thank goodness it was said right...........whew.......big sigh! what a relief!!! poor guy.....wonder if anyone told him he said breast.......i dont think he ever caught on himself.

purps.

Whiskeyjack

I was probably about 14 years old when one of our elders (an ex-navy man) was giving a talk on the ancient Israelites (I forget what the theme was) but he called them Israeli's right up 'till about halfway through the talk when he caught himself. Everyone laughed out loud when they realized he thought it was as funny a mental slip as the audience did! The weird things one remembers!

W.

Insomniac

At one of my old congs, we used to pick up some woman's private conversations on our mike system. I'm not sure if she was on a cordless phone or a cb radio, or what, but we heard her loud and clear. All through the Watchtower study, her voice was layered over that of the reader's. The cool part of it was, she never talked about anything wholesome- she'd drone on and on about what a #$%^ this guy was, what a slut her son's wife was, who was &*$%ing whom, all in this really slow, deep voice. Occasionally, she'd say "Hang on a minute Sophie, I gotta go pee." We were all told to just ignore her and focus on the study, but all through the congregation you could see people quivering with suppressed laughter. I sometimes wondered if the sound guy could have fixed the "problem" but didn't, because he was usually laughing harder than anyone else.

inday

One time I had to do the closing prayer on the midweek meeting. I was just back from holyday, and had an encounter with two chinese sisters the last day of my holyday. When praying I got confused when thinking 'I must not say: O, thank you Jehovah for those two chinese sisters that were in my bed last night'. While confused I did manage to finish the prayer normally without saying that thought aloud.

I do not believe. Chinese sisters do not do this

DannyBloem

they were not JW sisters I mean. They were sisters eachother, sorry

dorayakii

they were not JW sisters I mean. They were sisters eachother, sorry

"Fleshly" sisters you mean? Another funny one was in the group study. We were discussing something to do with Jesus' illustration of the wheat and the weeds... The book study ~~conductor~~ overseer, noticing that the children were starting to loose attention, asked "Now, children, have any of you heard of wheat? What is wheat?"... One little boy put his hand up and said, "Wheat's what you make bread out of innit?".... "Yes, that's right, well done." The parents of the child gleamed a proud smile of approval to their son, and nudged their daughter to wake up, follow suit and give them another comment to be proud of...

The elder continued: "And what about weeds, children, what is a weed?"... There was silence for a while as the daughter reflected on this challenge, then suddenly she put her hand up and said "Ummm, i think you smoke weed"

There was silence for a little as everyone held their breath, which gave them time to gage if they really should find it funny and look around to see if they were the only ones who were going to laugh... Then?...... Total mayhem.

wanderlustguy

We were going over the "Creation" book at the weekly bookstudy, and my little brother gave a long comment about how "orgasms" (meant to say organisms) were created, and how this orgasm is nothing like that orgasm, all orgasms are unique and there's no way a walking orgasm could ever be the same thing as an orgasm that lives in the water...etc

Great times...

What is you (or somebodies) best blooper in the KH?

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