What is you (or somebodies) best blooper in the KH?

by DannyBloem 70 Replies latest watchtower scandals

  • jimakazi
    jimakazi

    Not a booper - it was delberate. It was the 80's - I did my part on the ministry school wearing white shoes, blue green pants, and a white miami vice styled shirt, AND had a beard. They suggested next time i may have time to dress before the meeting.

    had the beard for a couple of years though - didn't make MS till I shaved it off. It showed a rebellous spirit. if only they could see me now!

  • Gozz
    Gozz

    There was this elder giving a talk about Compassion.

    Somewhere in between the talk, the "com" part got off, and he repeated, for the remaining 25 or so minutes "passion":

    ".... we must show passion for the sisters ..."

    "... we must have passion for one another..."

    the chariman's head remained bowed till the end of the talk; the guys and gals had a good laugh.

    .

  • Mr. Blue
    Mr. Blue

    I had been DF'ed for several years and was attempting a come back. I was at the Tuesday night book study at the hall. The regular conductor was not there and an older brother (who later was diagnosed with Alzheimer's) was in charge. Before the study started, he called on me to give the opening prayer. I declined.

  • Abaddon
    Abaddon

    There was a Elder in my Cong who used the trm 'heavenly father Jehovah' a lot in prayers.

    "HFK we thank you for x HFJ, and HFJ we would like to praise you HFJ for your beautiful creation that you HFJ made for us"... etc. ...

    I made the mistake of counting how many times he said it one day. At 30 I started to slowly lose control of the wave of laughter inside of me, shuddering slightly... and still he prayed on... at 45 I expelled an entire lung through my nostril... and I was in the second row.

    Couldn't believe I wasn't bollocked for it.

  • PaulJ
    PaulJ

    I cant believe i missed this thread. 2 that come to mind are;

    I musta have been 13/14 and i gave a talk and there was something in it about the apostles being amazed by Jesus, instead of repeating the word 'amazed' I said they were 'gob-smacked'.... i got a few chuckles but the school overseer had 'a word' with me after the meeting.

    My little boy was reading a whinnie the pooh book in the meeting and started to attack the brother in front of him with it. In the end i took the book off him, but he kept asking for it, getting more and more upset. I decided to take him out to try and calm him down.... as i was walking him out he shouted "but dad- I WANT POOH" I cant remember being that embarrassed in the KH.

  • tijkmo
    tijkmo

    not so much a blooper but quite funny none the less....we had a young guy in our hall who was handicapped..he had one non functioning leg that could be used for balance but couldnt take any weight... but in a service meeting item about youths a number of young ones were on the platform being interviewed and the elder thought it would be nice to include him...so they are all up on stage sitting, chatting, and answering the elders questions and when the item is finished they all get up and someone pulls this young guy up from his chair ...and he promptly collapses cos his good leg has gone to sleep...he was unhurt...but everyone else woke up

  • Hellrider
    Hellrider

    We had this one guy, that was slightly retarded, not diagnosed, I assume, living with his parents still , at the age of 45. Everyone knew he was retarded, so noone ever mentioned his problem to him: Flatulence is the english word, I think. Sometimes, when his stomach acted up, he`d just slip one fart after the other, the silent ones that always smell horrible. The whole KH would smell so horrible people would almost get sick. But the funny part is this: This guy was so dumb, that he though he could get away with it, just by blaming the children of the congregaton, whoever sat closest to him. He would stand there with his big dumb face, shaking his head in anger over all these children passing gas, how rude they were, looking at them, nodding his head to them with a serious grin on his face. And when I was little, we kids didn`t realise that he wasn`t foolong anyone, that the adults all knew that it was him all along, but that they, in respect of his parents and his retardedness, didn`t say anything. Only when I got a little older, we kids too could laugh on the inside at this retard. But now, as an adult with no contact with JWs anymore, I`m inclined to think that the joke was on all of us, not just him. It was all very surreal, that`s for sure.

  • swiftbreeze
    swiftbreeze

    The CO was giving a talk about fighting in the home and then coming to the kh acting nice and pleasant...well my child raised his hand (we were sitting in the front) then he pointed at me. I tried to act as if I didnt see him hoping he would put his hand down. but he kept pointing so i smiled and put he hand down...the rest of the meeting seemed like an eternity

  • melmoth
    melmoth

    Well this one's pretty tame, but I'll pitch it in anyway.
    I and a few other teens were roped into doing an onstage discussion with an edler about I-cant-recall-what. He took everything very seriously, and as I recall we all had to meet up at his house to plan and rehearse this, even though it was just one short part of a normal meeting (the weekday evening one, not the book study - it's been a while now). Anyway, since we'd overprepared and pretty much knew down to the word exactly what he'd be asking and exactly what we were expected to reply, my mind must've wandered until suddenly he turned to me and asked something entirely unfamiliar. I gave him a blank look, stalled a few seconds for time, and finally gave up. "Umm, that's not my question," I said. Brought the house down.
    Another time, also as a teen, I was giving a KM (?) talk on humility and opened it with "It's hard to be humble when you're as great as I am." Not a blooper, but it was fun getting a laugh when there were usually so few.

  • the_classicist
    the_classicist

    One older elder said, "Jesus' crucifixtion..." The whole KH went completely silent at "crucifixtion." It's pretty funny looking back at it (not the person making the mistake, but the response).

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