YOU MIGHT BE A J.W.

by brandnew 128 Replies latest jw friends

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  Coded Logic

  You might be a JW -

  If you're a woman who's been an "ordained minister" for 20 years but you've never given a sermon in your entire life.
  

  If you're NOT a member of the census bureau but you regularly drive down unused overgrown dirt roads to make sure there's no one living at the end.

  If you're a Christian but you vehemently object when anyone calls your spiritual place of worship a "church".

  If you think the story of Jephthah sacrificing his daughter to make God happy belongs in a children's book.

  
  
• 

  LisaRose

  If you don't know what sleeping in on the weekend feels like, you might be a Jehovah's Witness.

  If you feel guilty because you caught yourself humming a Chistmas Carol, you just might be a Jehovah's Witness.

  If you spend three hours on Saturday in the "preaching work", but only talk to one person for thirty seconds, you just might be a Jehovah's Witness.

  If "summer vacation" involves a few nights in a cheap hotel and sitting in the heat in dress clothes for three days straight, you might be Jehovah's Witness.
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  brandnew

  If you think a lion is standing next to you, and laughing while you watch porn.........

  YOU MIGHT BE A J.W...
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  brandnew

  
  
• 

  MissFit

  If you received new light and you did not get a new lamp,

  If you don't change your doctrine , you just get new light

  Or if the light got brighter without changing a light bulb

  If you turn away in horror at the sight of cross _You might be a JW or a Vampire
• 

  brandnew

  When its half time at a football game, and you get up with the urge to look for a song book.......

  YOU MIGHT BE A J.W.
• 

  MissFit

  I was going through my old posts and found this thread. I thought it was funny and enjoyed rereading it. Does anyone have any new ones to add?

  If you get insulted or scared when you are told you are an independent thinker you may be a JW

  If you send your ice cream money to the society you may be a jw child

  If you assume a couple is engaged because they are sitting next to each other and holding hands you may be a JW.
• 

  baker

  If you watch Trump,s speech and when he said we need more peace rather than war, you spoke up and brought up how much closer the Great Tribulation is than last year.
• 

  Coded Logic

  If you you can readily explain the difference between hemoglobin, platelets, and plasma - but you have no idea what your own blood type is . . . you might be a Jay-Dub.

  If you own a washer and dryer at home - but you still go to the laundry mat every Saturday morning . . . you might be a Jay-Dub.

  If you can name, in order, every single book of the Bible - but you can't name Jesus' twelve disciples . . . you might be a Jay-Dub.

  If paying for your child's college tuition doesn't keep you up at night - but worrying about them playing with a Sparlock doll does . . . you might be a Jay-Dub.