formerout

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Posts by formerout

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  160

  Why ? Why? WHY???

  by rune in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this topic has been rolling around in my head for some time.

  i don't expect that i'll write it perfectly as it needs to be articulated in different ways for different people...but i will do my best.

  and worst of all, i am not expecting any kind of response that will satisfy me.

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  formerout

  Czar,

  Quit while you're ahead with FBB and Rune. And from where I stand, you ARE ahead.

  I'm not saying this to insult either Rune or FBB but I think they have said enough here to warrant an observation from me. They both seem to think that their reality right now is..... well.... real! On the other hand they would both admit that their "reality" five years ago was different than it is now. They have changed, not the universe.... them.

  Yet they do not seem to want to accept that despite their strong convictions in life right now, these will change again. They certainly don't seem to want any other people telling them anyway. I find it ironic yet very telling of the true nature of certain humans..... that the people that are the most sure of themselves show to others that the actual fact is the opposite.

  Brad
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  22

  Ozzie's Weekend Poll #123

  by ozziepost in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  how's this weekend going for you?

  stinking hot downunder - and humid too.

  really draining weather - y'know what i mean?.

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  formerout

  11. Pressure.... from my mom and older siblings... and my sometimes dad. None of the others really applied because the pressure was so great that it automatically gave me a contempt for the organization and it's entire head of the household structure. It made it easier to leave, though.... .

  Brad
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  101

  I Need Some Serious Help Please !!!!!!

  by Peterpanippleskin in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  first of all, i am not a jw and i never will be, for my own reasons that i need not discuss further.

  however, i have a brother who is a jw and there is a serious problem that he is struggling with, which pertains to his horrible marriage, abusive wife, divorce and being "kicked out" of jw as a member... or whatever jw's call it.

  he has been married to a woman for 22 years.

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  formerout

  Peterpan,

  I can feel for your brother. My ex was never physically abusive, but she was very emotionally and verbally abusive. She made several false allegations to the police about me until I finally realized I had to leave. (We both left the religion about 8 years ago.) Your brother is at that stage too, in my opinion.

  As far as the JW rules go, I don't know if they have lightened up in recent years or if Mulan's comment is still bang on. Their belief structure and rules are insane, as you have seen. They also discourage people from going to the police, but is there any way that your niece could be convinced to go with your brother to a counsellor and discuss that they have concerns about her mental health? Possibly they should even charge her for the assault on your niece. When the shit hits the fan she might snap and do something even more drastic if she has not been dealt with criminally.

  I agree that she might be bi-polar as well. I believe my ex is too, but getting her to go to a doctor to find out has been impossible so far.

  The best case scenario for your brother is if you can convince him to leave her nd the religion, but it would have to be done subtly it seems.

  Keep us informed as to what has happened or if any of this advice is not relevant.

  Brad
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  34

  fell away.......wanna come back...please help.

  by Tiggerchick1012 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, so here's the situation.

  i am 24 yrs old.

  married and have 1 child.

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  formerout

  Tigger,

  Just another side-note...... shortly after my oldest child was born, 10 years ago, my brother told me that I needed to start going back to meetings so that my son didn't die at Armageddon (since I was the head of the household). While his intentions were good, it shocked me into realizing how screwed up my view of God was, having been raised as a JW.

  So I can relate to your feelings about giving your son hope, but like others have said, research first and you will realize how false that hope really is.

  Brad
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  34

  fell away.......wanna come back...please help.

  by Tiggerchick1012 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  ok, so here's the situation.

  i am 24 yrs old.

  married and have 1 child.

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  formerout

  Tiggerchick1012,

  This may not be what you want to hear, but I would recommend not going back. It sounds like their guilt is still a factor in your life and it is not healthy for you. I can understand that you want to help your child to have hope. I have four kids myself.

  Their living forever hope, while sounding nice, is not real. I would never have thought that I could be happier after being away from it and giving it up but I am happier than I ever was while I "believed" the paradise earth thing.

  Talk to your hubby about it some more but it may do you well to read a couple of books about not being a JW anymore.

  Whatever you choose to do, take care,

  Brad
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  1

  !

  by outnfree in

  1. jw
  2. friends
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  formerout

  outnfree,

  I know exactly what you mean.

  Brad
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  23

  What is Mankind's Greatest Mystery?

  by Blueblades in

  1. watchtower
  2. bible

  is it the mind / body riddle?

  or, the material brain / and consciousness.

  what to you is mankind's greatest mystery?.

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  formerout

  The Material Brain / and Consciousness

  I can't think of anything more mysterious yet beautiful at the same time. I'm curious to see what other comments you will evoke.

  Brad
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  16

  Court tomorrow.... wise advice is appreciated.

  by formerout in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  just a quick run-down for those who haven't followed my court case so far: .

  my ex and i have joint custody but primary residence is with her.

  she has broken a bunch of the orders that the judge made.

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  formerout

  Thanks to all, for your support.

  I_Dare,

  Thanks for asking. The Judge adjourned it until next Thursday. The only things that are to be addressed Thursday are whether she is in contempt and her "mobility", as that Judge put it. (Whether she should be allowed to stay in the town she moved to.)

  On a very good note, while I was waiting, I spoke to a lawyer about potentially taking my case. He invited me to see him after we were done. I went to his office after the adjournment. He is going to call my ex's lawyer on Monday.

  I strongly believe that her lawyer will cave now that I have a lawyer. Even though the Judge adjourned it, she said some things to her lawyer that indicated trhe direction that it would go even if I was representing myself. With a lawyer behind me it will be even better.

  This lawyer hasn't even asked for a retainer, by the way. Nice guy. I did tell the lawyer that I believe in prevention more than cure and positive reinforcement more than negative consequences, but..... lol..... my ex and her family do not so....... I will not go back to the "settlement" that we agreed to unless there are severe consequences if/when she does not abide by that agreement.

  Brad
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  12

  The Watchtower's big......(Homer Simpson-like)....... DOH'S!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  by formerout in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was just reading another thread where i was reminded about how the wtbts decided that it was "ok" to have babies again.

  i believe this was after the 1975 fiasco where, prior to this they were, in essence, telling people to drop everything, including having a family.. their great revelation about how it was now "ok to have babies" may have been a rush to judgement.

  the fact is that a lot of people left because they were "pissed" at being lied to.

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  formerout

  Mary,

  I loved your post. Just the right amount of light reasoning.

  Brad
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  160

  Why ? Why? WHY???

  by rune in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this topic has been rolling around in my head for some time.

  i don't expect that i'll write it perfectly as it needs to be articulated in different ways for different people...but i will do my best.

  and worst of all, i am not expecting any kind of response that will satisfy me.

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  formerout

  Rune said,

  czarofmischiefb: Um, ok, so you're trying to live up to your name by repeating some of the same old wrong things that formerout and LittleToe said earlier in this post I take it?

  Rune,

  I will leave myself wide open for your critcism here. (To be honest, it seems like that is all you have in your psyche anyway, so what the hell.)

  Don't ask a question of other people (as you have done here on this forum), when your (either conscious or subcoscious) reason is to criticize others. Nobody here thinks the same way that you do. Not even FBB does, although your acceptance of her "logic" has been noted as being noteworthy because hers is the closest to your rants.

  The next time you post a topic on here can you please make it evident from the very beginning that you wish to only have replies that stroke your own ego? Stupid people like Little Toe, Czar and myself will not waste our time, if you had of done so when you asked, "Why? Why? WHY???"

  Brad