Mrs Bee,
It sounds like he his jw-itis went active after you became pregnant? This is very common. This is what happened to MJ. We see your situation here about once a month? Having a child causes everyone to look at things differently. Things that weren't important enough to do for ourselves, become very important because we want to do what is best for our kids. People with jw-itis think the jw is what is best for the kids!
You have a critical opportunity as someone said, because he left already. On the other hand, he has decided on some level that he wants to go back. If you use grace and skill you will be able to open his eyes before his jw-itis is fully reactivated.
Unfortunately you haven't had time to aquire any skill. You don't know what you are doing yet, but there are some smart people here who just might be able to talk you through it!!! (picture one of those airplane movies, where the pilot is out and they are telling the passenger how to land the plane) You might just dodge a bullet here!!!
Let's get a better handle on your situation. Ask him these questions. When you ask them be genuinely curious. Don't come at him with an agenda, or as a salesmen. You are just another person trying to understand him better. This is the persona you want to cultivate regardless of what facts you know contrary to the wt. Never lose this persona. Remember ignorant is ok. Maybe practice saying these questions a few times until you get them down. The words are chosen carefully. Smile when you ask them.
1. Have you ever wondered if the jw are really the right religion?
2. How sure are you they are the right religion? On a scale from 1 to 10?
3. Why do you want to join again? (what you are trying to get at here, is what he hopes to achieve by joining. This is the real reason. Facts don't matter, it is reason he WANTS to believe that matters. So if he gives you some crap about it being the truth, keep trying to get at what he thinks it will do for his life now.)
4. If they weren't the right religion, would you want to know it?
5. You said you checked things out. Does that mean if you found a new fact, that seemed to prove they weren't the right religion, you would not want to join?
6. Do you mind if I check things out also? If I find something I think seems to prove they aren't the right religion, can I ask you about it? You won't get mad at me for asking? (this one is tricky. You don't want him to try to bring some other witness in. If he tries, say, "I want to know what you think. I trust you!!! Those other people are strangers!!!")
These are pretty safe questions. Don't get frustrated. He has been subject to mind control. He might sound dense sometimes. It is a defense mechanism. At any point, if he gets mad, BACK OFF!!! Time to re-assess.
Based on his answer to those questions, you will have a better idea how to proceed. Let us know what he says, and you will get some good ideas from the folks here on how to proceed. Again, don't do anything without checking here first. The nice thing about cults is they are very predictable. You can pretty much ask somebody here how your jw husband will respond, and they will be right most of the time. That is why I keep saying to check here first.
Someone else plugged Steven Hassans' books. I endorse them as well. Order them, but put them in the dustcover of another book or hide them. DON"T LET HIM SEE THEM (or any book that is anti jw)!!! Order those books RIGHT NOW!!! Why are you still reading this!!! Those are the most important books for you to get first because they tell you how to do this (help open his eyes). Don't try to do to much without reading, re-reading, and re-reading those books. Being a ubm is a high art. There are a few naturals out there like Jgnat. The rest of us need a book!
Keep us updated.
CYP