Posts by sass_my

12

I couldnt pass by them

by Blackboo in

finally ran into some jw's after 10 months of being disfellowship.

it took me by shock and storm.

i wasnt expecting to see any that day..since i went to a wal-mart way outside my area..but dang there they were a brother with his wife i use to play basketball with!

sass_my_frass

I meant to add, I like to think that as a former friend is walking away from me, pretending I'm not there, I remember to shout out:

"You're going to grow old and die!"

Not that I would, but thinking about it makes me feel better.

12

I couldnt pass by them

by Blackboo in

finally ran into some jw's after 10 months of being disfellowship.

it took me by shock and storm.

i wasnt expecting to see any that day..since i went to a wal-mart way outside my area..but dang there they were a brother with his wife i use to play basketball with!

Hey don't beat yourself up, it's a really weird situation. Hopefully you'll toughen up to it. If you don't think this is too sad, practice smiling, waving, going up and saying hi. They're the freaks who have to pretend you're invisible. If you're lucky there will be a group of people around who will see them panic and pretend you're a ghost.

Hold your head high. They don't deserve you!

70

The fade is over, talked to my parents last night. (very very long)

by Paralipomenon in

jw
friends

there would never be a good time to have this conversation.

quite different from most people raised a witness, i have very few horror stories about my upbringing.

my family was just a family, my mom and dad fought and argued, my siblings and i misbehaved and got in trouble.. .

sass_my_frass

Beautiful work Para, congratulations to you and Bobbi and the kids too. Hopefully soon it will feel like a relief that you're not having to tiptoe around this thing. In time you'll realise that it's not a big thing. It always will be to your parents, but you guys will just be living and getting on with being happy.

It probably isn't over yet. They've got to get over the shock, think some things through, work their way through the problems you pointed out, and then think about how this will affect the family. Clearly their conscience doesn't demand that they be the ones to turn you in. That says a lot about their integrity towards you. You may have a series of negotiations ahead, but that's okay now, right?

You've got to accept that there was never going to be a solution that left everybody happy and free. There's going to be weirdness for a while. Take control of your life and protect yourselves. This may not be a good time, but sometime you'll need to think about how you'd handle the grandkid issue if the cong kicked you out. Don't play the game. If you're not family, neither are the kids. You're not in any way banning them from seeing the kids, you're only insisting that you're there as well. That's how a family works - they don't get to choose who to keep.

I'm interested too in what you dad means by his being proud of you. I got that from my folks when I was going to talk to the elders. Is he proud because he thinks you're about to take some kind of bullet?

Hi Bobbi, good to see you again, I hope you're okay!

37

can you feel the love?

by bigdreaux in

jw
friends

today i was at the dealership.

i was standing next to the service department.

i struck up a conversation with an elderly guy standing there.

sass_my_frass

I don't think I'll ever be able to decide whether they're all cruel or crazy.

34

what about NOT making new friends...life as a hermit for most part

by oompa in

i actually saved a classified ad from an east coast paper that needed experienced crew on a 48' sailing yacht.

i was at this town for my 10th wedding anniversary and staying at a nice b&b.

this was back in april.

sass_my_frass

(oompa)

I know I'm lucky to have my hubby. I don't really have other friends though, and I think we both should. I don't know why, it just seems like a good idea. I think I'll be one of those people who at the end of her life wishes that she'd been more active and taken more risks.

26

My JW Experience

by V1710 in

i've been lurking here for a few years on and off.

i faded from the borg seven years ago and haven't had one regret since.

the only regret i have is wasting twenty years of my life and my children's lives.

sass_my_frass

Hi V. What a great story! Thank you for introducing yourself, and welcome.

108

Hello everyone, first post.

by Frjprice in

jw
friends

hello, i just wanted to introduce myself to everyone here - as i will be posting here.. i grew up a jw and pioneered, was a ministerial servant, ect, i was in the organization for 17 years.

i left and naturally my family did as they were told and cut off all communication with me.

this left a horrible taste in my mouth for not just jw's, but any religion for that matter.

sass_my_frass

Hi and welcome. Congratulations on the rolling stone aspect of your life. I hope it's going really well for you! In your picture, you look happy and self-confident, and that's great.

40

Warning to Witnesses with blood cards = 11 bags blood but still alive!!!

by Witness 007 in

i friend of mine wen't to a night club where things got out of hand, and a drunken fight resulted in him being stabbed in the abdomen with a large knife.

rushed to hospital {lucky boy 15 min drive} he arrives looking pale and too weak to walk, he already had lost alot of blood.

taken immediatley inside for emergency treatment.

sass_my_frass

(Rabbit)

28

Do those of you "born into the truth" have problems with relationships?

by marmot in

i'm a 4th generation dub and i was the epitome of a goodie-two-shoes elder's son.

i was taught/brainwashed that dating was evil and only for mature brothers (i distinctly remember a part on the assembly with a "demonstration" that said even 24 years old was too young to date and you should concentrate on becoming a ms or pioneer first) and went through so much soul-destroying guilt because of the society's utterly ridiculous stance on masturbation that it almost drove me to suicide.

didn't help that my father the elder had a massive porn stash.

sass_my_frass

:)

I started dating at 27, and I had no idea how anything works. I'd chaperoned my sister and her fiance at every moment they ever saw each other. To me, dating was courting, and courting was a series of wholesome excursions with people a generation older. Even now I'm aggro that I missed a great big window of adventure and learning in my life.

I can't think of any good big-sister advice for you, except for: know your contraception. Be safe, don't hurt anybody, and get out there.

20

It's official (family-wise) I am an apostate

by RisingEagle in

jw
friends

i was having lunch last week with my mom and she dropped the a-word on me.

my mom started off the lunch speaking about what a disappointment i was to her that my wife and i had put our little girl into a christian private school.

i posted on an earlier thread that my wife and i now have a 6 year old beautiful little girl that we're adopting.

sass_my_frass

I read the title and thought 'bummer dude' because I know what a sentence that is, but no, your mum is just playing games. Actually in a while you'll think that the word is a joke and it won't give you the creeps to think that some people think it applies to you. It's just a perception thing.

Anyway, mums are a problem. My folks are the only people in my family who haven't cut me off and on one hand I'm grateful, on the other, it's a constant trial. I'm just giving it lots of time, letting them work through it. In a few years I think we'll have found an equilibrium in which we'll be able to tolerate each others company and get through a visit just ignoring the massive elephant in the room (to them it's the atheism, to me it's the emotional brutality).

I far prefer life when I am able to forget that I ever had a family. My new people are so much better. Be a great family man - that's the real stuff of life! Whenever mum phones, just insist on a fun-only rule. Tell her that if she can't say anything nice today you're going to have to hang up because you're in too good a mood.

sass_my_frass

Posts by sass_my_frass