I remember the first time I ever received "serious" counsel from the elders. I was 17 or 18. It was on a Sunday, things seemed fine. An elder said something to the extent that he wished to speak with me after the meeting. They had some elders meeting after the meeting and I was there until noon and they were still in it so I ended up leaving. Subsequently, I ended up going home. I was planning on playing basketball with some friends from the hall.
Brother Rottman (elder and father of best friend at the time), called me there as I was preparing to leave and seemed rather angry that I had left. He said they still needed to talk to me. I had no idea what it was about. Seriously, I wasn't engaged in any wrongdoing or anything like that, but I was being called down to "the principals office", so to speak.
So I got there after picking up my cousin. This is where things become fuzzy. I was counseled on "having a bad attitude". I remember not knowing what that meant. If they could point out some sort of example. Let me know what I was supposed to be working on, or something. And the only thing I got back from them was that asking that "showed that I had a bad attitude". They also didn't like the way I kept my hair and my meeting clothes. I was dumbfounded.
I think this was also the meeting where "brother" Rottman blamed his stepson's deciding to stay permanently with his real father in Ohio when on a visit. Apparently the kid told him and his mother that I had encouraged him to do that. This kid was literally a pathological liar. Being his close friend I knew that I couldn't take 90% of anything he said to be true. (you dont have a lot of choices in friendships as a JW youth) So I said to them: "Why would I encourage my closest friend to move to Ohio?" Of course I didn't say anything like that to him. I don't know if they believed me but it was the truth. On the other hand, he had mentioned to me that he was thinking about it but I sure didn't want him to.
I became rather distraught and upset after it was all over. I have never figured out what the point of it all was either. I do remember blasting some music and speeding out of the parking lot pretty pissed off though. As far as I can remember, that was the point in my life where I actually developed my "bad attitude". I figured that if I were getting disciplined for something, I might as well be guilty of it. That is also the point that I lost any and all respect for any elders.
I know it isn't really a huge story. It doesn't have the shock value of some of the stories I've read. I grew up as a JW and this was the life I knew, but to all of a sudden, seemingly out of the blue be told: 'You have a problem and not knowing what the problem is proves that you have a problem.' was very disturbing to me. I think this is where my questioning and criticism began.