Posts by skeeter1

65

Did you AWAKEN from the JWs by yourself?

by cultBgone in

jw
friends

i was thinking about how so many posters here on jwn are frustrated and frantic to help their loved ones get away from the brainwashing of jws, and how much advice is given about how to help family members and loved ones.

i considered my own leaving and that it was internal turmoil based on the teachings getting weirder and child abuse issues, to name just a few, and it made me wonder:.

did you self-awaken or were you assisted by the gentle proddings of a friend or family member?

skeeter1

"Guns a blazing" works if the JWs won't stop contacting you (but you want them too).

77

Just quit quietly - the law is on your side!

by Ajax in

jw
friends

freedon of religion guarantees any individual the legal right to abandon any religion at any time for any reason.. if you are a citizen of a country which champions human rights, then your government doesn t care what religion you join, but they will uphold your freedom to join it, without interference, coercion or persecution.

your countries human rights legislation will conversely uphold your rights when it comes time to abandon any religion you so choose.

those (elders) who incite others interfere, coerce or persecute those who have left will be in transgression of the human rights statutes.. a person is only obligated to ecclesiastic law if he exposes himself to it or transgressed it while still a member of a religious community.. when your time comes to abandon the jw-wt cult, do it while still in good standing, be proactive - be decisive -put it in writing!..and do it before the hounders set sights on you.. write a card or letter with as much or as little explanation as you one day might wish to share with pharisees and lawyers.. take this card to a notary public to have your signature witnessed and have the writing overstamped in several places with the date.

skeeter1

In the US, the ability to stand in court depends on what state you live in AND what actions the cult takes against you.

In Bear v. Mennonite, Pennslyvania courts found that immediate family can't disown. Thus, the WTS doesn't allow parents to abandoned underaged children.

In Wollersheim v. Church of Scientology, California courts found that the church can't financially break an ex-member. There, the church told ex-members to not pay their invoices to Mr. Wollersheim. The church also sent Mr. Wollersheim a revised bill, undoing his discount for their bio-feedback machine sessions (called auditing).

That being said, JWs have carefully done their disfellowshipping. They don't announce the reason (to avoid a libel lawsuit) and contend that the individual members have a right to not associate with whoever they want to, and don't advocate married people and/or children be required to be ousted from the house. Rather, it's all "individual choice." WTS Legal, baby.

63

After Six Months of Hiatus, I can tell you the Watchtower is Starting to Crumble Faster than you think!

by SanLuisObispoTruthSeeker in

i took a hiatus from jwn because the wall started to collapse because i lost several people ive known almost my entire life.

these were people i thought would never die, the lies told by the watchtower is unforgivable!

there was a party i attended keeping a low profile while documenting what was said.

skeeter1

The socialogical/psychological definition of a cult is whether or not it follows many aspeccts of the BITE model of mind control. To that, I would say that Mormons are a cult. Ex-Mormons will attest to it, and make up a large portion of self-help cult exit groups like Internaional Cultic Studies Association.

45

About the ten plagues in Egypt

by runForever in

alot of people are saying god is cruel for killing the firstborns and animals and people in the ten plagues.

but didn't god achieve his goal of making nations and people be in fear of him?.

skeeter1

Why does a perfect God, who has the mental ability to create the universe and everything in it, need for us to live in fear of him, kill our first born child, etc? What type of perfect God is this?

And, thank you CrazyGuy. You saved me some typing.

57

Couple questions....like if JW's not the right way then what is?

by world in

jw
friends

new member here so don't attack :d here is a couple questions i have been contemplating lately.. .

if jw isn't the right religion, then which one is?

or is it basically believe in god, the bible and you'll be fine?.

skeeter1

Welcome to a new part of your spiritual journey.

I am not going to answer any of your questions. I don't know the ultimate "black & white" answer. I will tell you what I've found out. Those who t claim to speak of absolute authority and knowledge on things in another world, cause the most harm to others who obey them. Those who don't pretend to know every answer to another world, do not cause such harm.

Skeeter

p.s. I do disagree with you that the Faithful and Discreet Slave who acts as Jehovah's direct communication with mankind since 1914, has always been a panacea of racial harmony. http://www.freeminds.org/african/discrimination.htm

28

Top 10 Signs that Jehovah's Witnesses Want to Disfellowship You:

by OnTheWayOut in

i've posted these years ago and was reminiscing, so i thought i would share the laugh with you again.. top 10 signs that jehovah's witnesses want to disfellowship you:.

10. there's two guys in suits staying all night outside your home in a four-door sedan.. 9. an elder you spoke to on the phone calls and asks you to repeat what you said the other day, but asks you to speak slowly and clearly.. 8. suddenly, jw friends stop by and ask an awful lot of the same questions.. 7. your laptop computer was moved, left on, or is missing.. 6. you left your car unlocked, it was thoroughly searched by someone but absolutely nothing is missing including your gps which was searched too.. 5. your boss asks if you are in trouble with the law or someone, stating some really polite men were asking about you and left some "tracts.".

4. someone picked up the cigarette butts around your back porch.. 3. the bartender at your favorite nightspot asks if you have ever before seen the guys in the corner booth that have been ordering "cokes" all evening and pulling out a camera everytime you order a beer.. 2. you receive registered mail and you already served on a jury this year.. 1. your jw mother who finally had accepted that you will never go back starts begging you to either go back to the kingdom hall or move with no forwarding address.. .

skeeter1

Marking . . .

88

Why JW marriage is a huge problem for the organization.

by kneehighmiah in

jw
friends

the difficulty of finding a marriage mate is well known for sisters.

but i would say it's hard for brothers also.

i was talking to a jw last night.

skeeter1

I know a JW sister who is attractive for her age, never married, likes arts & crafts, and children. She WILL NOT marry a JW man. She won't marry a worldly man. She really fears that all JW men are wife beaters, rapists, . . . or, at a bare minimum, ego-maniac roosters who she doesn't want to submit to.

26

JWs say, "They don't judge"

by skeeter1 in

what is up with jws?

lately, i've heard this line, "we don't judge .

but, doesn't everyone judge?

skeeter1

What is up with JWs? Lately, I've heard this line, "We don't judge . . "

But, doesn't everyone judge? Honest. This is an excerpt from Brian Berry, who is being honest.

"january 20, 2014 by brian berry leave a comment

Nobody likes that statement. But it’s true. Try as you may to NOT judge others, you WILL do it. I do it. We ALL DO IT all the time. Guaranteed.

body weight, shape, gender, age (so and so is fat cuz of this habit)
socioeconomic status (that guy drives that car cuz he’s a “rollin’ in it”)
religion or faith (only a fool would believe such and such)
job (I shoulda known… that’s surely why they behave like this)
passions (only xyz kind of people like to do that)
hobbies (because they do this, abc is true of them)

And those are just a few of the judgements we make every day. Some are spoken. Some are merely thought. Some directly affect our actions and some are so subconscious and ingrained in us that they shape us in ways too subtle to identify directly."

And, when a JW puts on their guilt trips, aren't they/WTS judging?

"We've missed you at the meeting." (Judging, you should be at the meetings.)

"True Christians" (Judging, this is the standard you must attain, or be deemed a non-Christian).

Oh, but they don't judge . . . .. . .

8

JWs & Guilt Trips

by skeeter1 in

the watchtower is a manipulator.

one of the tools they use is guilt, and they use it via the "guilt trip.

" just so we are clear, a guilt trip is:.

skeeter1

Here's an article I found helpful in recognizing manipulative people, shows how to recognize and handle it.

http://www.wikihow.com/Pick-Up-on-Manipulative-Behavior

Curtail the guilt trip. Guilt trips are really high on the list of manipulative tools. If you can get someone else to feel guilty, then you're home and hosed. The trouble is, people wear out after being made to suffer guilt trip after guilt trip and the manipulator who thinks that he or she is on to a good thing here risks losing respect, friends, and being distanced by those who can't get away, such as family and co-workers. One of the key things to keep in mind when escaping the guilt trip bind is that the sooner you nip it in the bud, the better, and that it's their guilt trip, not yours. Here are some approaches to the guilt trip:

Recognize it. Guilt trips are usually prefaced with "If you really cared about me, you'd...", or "If you were more responsible, you'd...", or "If you were more understanding, you'd...". In each case, you can substitute the words they add in after with "do as I want". Another way of inducing a guilt trip is to tell you what you wouldn't do, for example: "I knew I'd misheard it! After all, you'd never get engaged without telling me first." In that small phrase, you've just been told that the expectations are that you'll defer to this person before making any decisions.
Turn it back on the guilt giver. Take a return-to-sender approach with guilt trips and don't let their interpretation of your behavior determine the situation. In this case, you can give them a little of their own medicine so that they understand how it feels to be made to feel guilty. This approach involves taking what the manipulator has said and tell them how they aren't respecting, appreciating, caring for, etc. your behavior toward them, and in the process, you dissolve the need to meet the obligation they're aiming to impose. For example:
- A: "You don't care about all the hard work I've done for you."
- You: "I sure do care about the hard work you've done for me. I've said as much many times. Now it seems to me that you don't appreciate how much I care."
- A: "That's not true! I appreciate it!"
- You: "Yes, just as I appreciate your hard work."
Shorten their hold on you. When a manipulator tries to guilt-trip you by suggesting that they don't matter, don't buy into it. Instead, answer with a quick retort that breaks this hold instantly. For example:

A: "Okay then, go on that camping trip with your friends while I do all the work looking after the dogs. Don't worry about me."
You: "That's great! I'm glad you're happy to look after the dogs while I'm away. Thanks!"

Shift the assumption statement away from you. One of the things that is so riling about having another person tell you what it is that you're thinking or doing is that they are not taking you seriously or treating you as a whole person. Instead, they are attempting to overlay how they'd like you to behave and this comes right back to how they'd like you behave so that it benefits them . Assumption statements can be harder to pick up on but it's essential that you do so in order to deflect them quickly and effectively. Some examples include statements using "suppose", "guess", "wish", etc: "I suppose you're going to leave me alone again." or "I wish you'd understand how hard it is for me, after all I've done for you, to have you not want to stay longer with me each Christmas." The problem with the assumption statement is that there is no question; a manipulator doesn't like asking questions because it causes them to feel a loss of control . In a healthier relationship situation, questions would elicit what you're doing and a conversation could proceed from this understanding; a manipulator would prefer to make the assumption as to what you're doing because it then allows them to them to be in control of the you they've described rather than the you they need to listen to. Break the supposition away from your actions by ignoring the manipulative negative implication and return the manipulator to reality by clarifying your equally valid value attaching to what you're doing. For example:

A: "I wish you'd understand how hard it is for me, after all I've done for you, to have you not want to stay longer with me each Christmas."
You: "Actually, I spend as much time with you as I spend with Kate's parents and just as you and dad used to do when I was growing up, I'm happily dividing my time equally between both families."
A: "I suppose you're going to leave me alone again."
You: "I'm not leaving you alone. You've got your favorite movie on tonight, the dog's with you wanting attention, and I'll be back on Tuesday, as usual."
A: "If you've got more important things to do, then it's best you don't waste time visiting me."
You: "I'm glad you understand how busy things are for me right now. It's an expensive time to fly and I'll be able to spend more time with you when I come next May."

Move away from the mind games of what the manipulator thinks other people say or do. The use of third party "authority" is thoughtlessly rampant in much of everyday life because we like to defer to these generalizations as a way of backing up our own vague and often unexplored preferences. While most of us know it's a bad habit , in the hands of a manipulator, it becomes a weapon. Whenever a manipulator resorts to quoting what your Aunt May, cousin Josh or darling Katie down the street would do or are saying, see warning lights flashing. This tactic is used to try and compare the perceived lack in your responsiveness with the manner in which other people apparently would behave more appropriately than you (read: they'd do it for the manipulator whereas you're holding out). While some of this is to do with the manipulator fantasizing that the grass is greener in someone else's life, it's far more about being a tool that lets the manipulator abdicate his or her own responsibility for making the statement.

A:"Mary says it'd be better if you didn't leave me alone all the time. She says it's harmful for me."
You:"I didn't realize Mary was a psychologist. I must speak to her about the possibility of her spending more time with you."
A:"Everyone thinks you're not being kind to me when you refuse to buy me a second diamond ring."
You:"Everyone? I must meet these people who are so flush! I'd love to buy you another ring but I'm glad you have a beautiful one to keep you occupied until our budget can withstand any more large purchases."

8

JWs & Guilt Trips

by skeeter1 in

the watchtower is a manipulator.

one of the tools they use is guilt, and they use it via the "guilt trip.

" just so we are clear, a guilt trip is:.

skeeter1

The Watchtower is a manipulator. One of the tools they use is guilt, and they use it via the "guilt trip." Just so we are clear, a guilt trip is:

guilt trip when someone tries to make you feel guilty for thinking/feeling/doing things a certain way.

or

when someone tries to make you do whatever they want you to. so they start making you feel bad about something.. so then you'll give in and do whatever they want.

Here are two examples from the WTS. Please add more

-The catchphrase "True Christians" is a guilt trip phrase. It sets up the expected behavior.

-""We" have missed you (at the Kingdom Hall, out in service)." It is never, "Hi, I called because I want to know how you are doing". Instead, the Watchtower Soceity has its followers use "group think" (another manipulative tactic).

Followers of the WTS (and ex-followers) have learned how to manipulate others via the guilt trip. I believe because the WTS uses the guilt trip so extensively, that the followers really tune into this.