jwcol

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Posts by jwcol

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  47

  Snakes on a Plane...for or against?

  by jgnat in

  1. social
  2. entertainment

  i admit it, i'm not cool.

  i miss the trends.

  i don't notice a new fashion until half the women in this city are draped in it.

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  jwcol

  Only one reason to see SOAP:

  Samuel L. Jackson

  If he wasn't in it, NOBODY would see it...HE'S the cult icon.
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  18

  Gen Xers--Who remembers when Smurfs were Demonic?

  by apostawriter in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  when word came down that a smurf jumped up in the middle of a meeting, yelled 'i've had enough of this shit!

  ' and stormed out, i was probably 9 years old.

  at the time i had a smurf record.

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  jwcol

  I remember that too, LOL.

  I also remember it was said on stage, maybe even at a convention, can't remember that the name of the band RUSH meant "Riders Under Satan's Hand". Everyone was scared to listen to that demonic music. I got older and listened to Rush and it's the most wholesome music on the air, no sex, no drugs, no demonism, nothing at all. Songs about trees, guitars, cars, music, that's it.
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  14

  relationship in trouble because of watchtowers pathetic rules

  by NoAnswers in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hey guys i need some help with some research about oral sex.. there is a recent article, that talkes about it.

  so know this has had a impact in my relationship with my wife.. i want to show her that they have changed there minds many times regarding this.

  i need a little help with some info.. to think about this gets me so angry because of many posts i have read that the wt ruins lifes.. especially dannyhazzard and many others.

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  jwcol

  
  
  
  
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  27

  Do Sex Offender Laws Go Too Far In SOME Cases?

  by target in

  1. watchtower
  2. child-abuse

  a young man of 20 has sex with his willing 17 year old girl friend.

  her parents find out and press charges.

  now he is a sex offender.

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  jwcol

  I worked with a girl that was going to get married to her boyfriend of a year. Before her, he had hooked up with a girl that apparently had a fake ID and was 17. They met at a bar, so she shouldn't even have been in there. He was in his mid 20s. The mom found out something had happened and called police and had him arrested. He went to jail for 2 years. The girl I worked with had to visit him in jail and wait until he got out to marry him. They did get married though and it's all behind him now...except for being a sex offender.
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  15

  Shunning

  by choosing life in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i was reading stories about various ones on the board who are being shunned by loved ones.

  i am officially being shunned as of today by my daughter because i refuse to shun her.

  she was just disfellowshipped.how do you get past the hurt?

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  jwcol

  The original purpose was as a last resort for persons who didn't want to change. The purpose today...what it has evolved into is a far cry from it's original intent. Today, it's used for punishment. It's based more on what you did and what you deserve as a result. My elder body went over the mosaic code with me, and Jehovah's standards and how there HAD to be punishment and consequences. The said I WAS repentant and turned around, but I HAD to be punished by disfellowshipping, there was just no way around it. I honestly think it's one of those things where it is a tool that is used to see if people will sink or swim...leave or work through the reinstatement process, and also scare others in the hall. I think they feel they "need" a disfellowshipping every so often in every hall just to keep people in check. I would just reeeeeally like to take a look at the "Pay Attention" book and see what it says on the matter. I wonder if it's different from what is outlined in the mags....and the Bible for that matter.

  I like how they explain that there is no minimum time period for disfellowshipping, but it's never sooner than 6 months to a year. If you're going to specifically kick a person out for a certain period of time, just be honest and let them know how long it's going to be instead of saying "yes, you are repentant, no, there is no minimum time, but it hasn't been long enough." It's just all a big game and it's irritating.
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  12

  Were you ever jealous of ones that left????

  by mama1119 in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i always wondered how they had the balls to do it.

  and especially if they seemed happy with no remorse, and were able to celebrate holidays and live "normal" lives.

  i remember wishing, in my early twenties, that i had the strength to do that.

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  jwcol

  Some married guy in his early 20s last year gave an experience at the DC about his porn problem. He went into great detail about how he was addicted and he could never go near a computer and would never own a computer again because he was sooooo addicted to porn. Everyone was like "what a complete idiot..."

  But as far as how I felt when others left, it always bothered me that people had the attitude that it could never happen to them. They always used the opportunity to put the person down and make themselves feel like they were better than that.
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  39

  my story

  by jaberwalkie in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  this is a difficult thing for me to do, i used to be a jehovahs witness 20 years service as a pioneer.. last thursday it was announced from the platform at my local kingdom hall that i was disfellowshiped.. it was a bit of a shock.

  i still have a deep sence of anger at what happened to me and its so unfair.. it started 3 years ago when i began to feel ill and i missed a couple of meetings.

  the elders were wonderful and came round and cheered me up.

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  jwcol

  Being suicidal or attempting it is not a DF offense anymore I believe. I went through it a year ago before my divorce and they wanted me to give a talk the next week because it was scheduled! There was an article about supporting those going through it, but I doubt any of them read it.

  All these articles come out on depression and suicide and different things like that, to help the elders shepherd the flock, but I've never heard of them pulling out any of those articles. It's usually just a quest to find out what rules you broke. Again, I'm shocked that this is so incredibly common.

  When I was disfellowshipped they said "Well, there's no doubt you are repentant and you have changed your course and you have been through a lot. However, you can't ever be TRULY repentant unless you've been disfellowshipped, so that's our decision."
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  36

  What are you up to this weekend?

  by saki2fifty in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  well, i've been reading, and reading, and even more reading and just dont have it in me to respond (midnight here)... so... here's whats going on with me this weekend.. i live in houston, and scheduled a trip up to austin for the weekend for a little race that we are participating in.

  check it out, its pretty cool.

  its called the muddybuddy and can be found @ www.muddybuddy.com.

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  jwcol

  
  Katie, too bad you aren't closer to Daytona, I'd take you out and show you around!
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  16

  Elders and Their Word.

  by Blueblades in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  have elders told you one thing then did something else other than what they said they would do for you?

  let me give you an example.

  when the elders in our former congregation were trying to get my son to come to an elder's meeting they called me and said they would do everything possible to aid and assist my son with some problems that he was having.

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  jwcol

  Thanks for the welcome!

  I've come to the sad conclusion that compassionate elders are very few and far between. We read what's in the magazines about they are supposed to treat the sheep, yet I have only found one over the years that is truly a good example. You would think that arrogant, totalitarian elders would be the exception rather than the rule, but it doesn't seem to be the case. I just think it's easier for people to break things down into rules and be dogmatic about it instead of offering love, taking situations into consideration, and genuinely trying to HELP people. Right now, the divorce rate in the organization is just as high as outside. This is proof that there is definitely SOMETHING wrong with the way things are done. The goal is just to disfellowship people and blame one party instead of getting to the root of the problem. It is so very sad.
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  16

  Elders and Their Word.

  by Blueblades in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  have elders told you one thing then did something else other than what they said they would do for you?

  let me give you an example.

  when the elders in our former congregation were trying to get my son to come to an elder's meeting they called me and said they would do everything possible to aid and assist my son with some problems that he was having.

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  jwcol

  Absolutely this has happened to me.
  
  

  I had been married for almost 10 years. My wife was very abusive mentally and emotionally....I know, it's not common. Since our first year of marriage, she told me she was disgusted by me and didn't want to have sex except when she was in need. I adjusted. At 9 years, I fell into deep depression and had a complete nervous breakdown. I left my wife to avoid the evenings of her screaming at me. I wanted death. I left her and stayed with a girl from work. I told her there would be no relationship and had no idea there would be. She was very affectionate and was attracted to me. I ate up the attention and I committed immorality. I ended up sleeping with her several times. I came back home because I didn't want to be involved sexually with another woman and all of a sudden things were getting very complicated when all I really wanted was peace.

  I told my wife what happened. She admitted to me it was all her fault for driving me away and begged me to come back and things would be different. I trusted her. I was so sorry for what happened. I was very repentant and only hoped we could work things out. She talked to the elders and told them what happened. I would have talked to them, but she was the type of person that always wanted to handle everything. Besides, she wanted to talk to them and get them to meet with both of us. She felt very responsible for what had happened. For the first time, I felt positive that all these years might not be for nothing. The brothers told my wife they only wanted to help me and help us stay together. They met with me only...I thought they would meet with me, then her, then both of us. Instead, they met with me and after a 20 minute meeting disfellowshipped me. The only counsel that was read was from an older Watchtower that said "we must not me in a hurry to assume the wrongdoer is repentant." The main brother really liked my wife and was trying to protect her. He told me that even though she forgave me, that I needed to leave her. Two brothers later tried to convince my wife to leave me. My wife and I worked things out. She quickly went back to her old ways and slept with a guy from work. She was privately reproved and I was blamed by both her and the elders.

  There's more to the story and we divorced 4 years later, but yes, they brothers will say one thing and do another. I used to work with that elder though and he told me several times that lying is not wrong if the person "does not deserve the truth". I guess he didn't think I deserved the truth.