Posts by LisaRose

20

ladies , its not just me, is it?..

by sowhatnow in

ok ladies, has there been any documented studies on the role religion or society plays in keeping women in an economical and social disadvantaged state ?

im wondering how many other women out there in the world, who either being raised or being long term followers of a strict religious faith,with traditional family structures, have upon either divorce or death of a spouse find it nearly impossible to find a mate or economic stability , and live out the remainder of their lives struggling and either bouncing from one guy to another, being disappointed or used, or simply alone.

i have personally felt, that i, being a xjw and now divorced woman , with no acceptable work skills,[ ie: fancy resume with degrees] living of low wage part time work and barely any alimony , will simply be viewed as someone trying to get another man to support her.

LisaRose

I don't think you are far wrong, I have heard many men here express similar things, women are just looking for a meal ticket, just lazy, gold diggers, etc., but I think you just need to keep looking, you can't judge all men because of two clunkers. There are probably lots of men who would be happy to find a nice woman, even if she didn't make a lot of money. A lot of men don't even want a career driven woman.

You also might want to think bout what you might bring to a relationship other than money. You can't change the past and where you are right now financially, but what are your strengths? What are you passionate about? What are you bringing to a potential relationship? Are there interests you have that you did not explore because of being a JW? Can you take a class, or join an interest group? That's a great way to meet like minded people.

Are you self conscious of your current financial situation? Do you think men are judging you because you don't make a lot of money? If so it could be that what is turning them off is not your lack of money, it's your lack of confidence. How can you expect someone else to value you if you don't value yourself? You are more than your income, and a person who is self confident and happy is much more attractive to others. Everyone has gifts they can bring to the world, so figure out what yours are and even if you don't meet anyone you will be a lot happier and more self cconfident.

56

JW's came to my door 6 weeks ago. I told them I was inactive.......

by Alchemist in

6 weeks ago some jws came to my door.

i've been inactive for 8 years.

after they gave their presentation i told them i was inactive.

LisaRose

That has not been my experience at all, I have met a lot of really great people since leaving. I did have some nice JW friends, but I also knew a few not so great JWs.

I would suggest you research the JWs a bit before you go back, there are a lot of things I was told by the Watchtower that were exaggerations and outright lines. It was quite a shock to me that in thirty years of being a JW I knew so little about them.

I was told the Watchtower predicted the last days would start in 1914, which is not true, they predicteded that Christ would return and the world would end, it was only when that didn't happen that they made up the bit about the "invisible return".

I also learned that that prediction was based on chronology taken from another religion and based on an incorrect date for the fall of Jerusalem. Now that it's obvious that their prediction that the generation alive in 1914 would not die before Armageddon was a failure, they have changed the meaning of "a generation" to mean a whole second group of people who knew the original group of people that were alive in 1914 would not die before Armageddon, this making up a meaning for the term "a generation" that is completely made up.

They have been secretly paying off victims of child sex abuse and demanding that the victims sign a nondisclosure agreement. They pretend they have very little child abuse in the congregations while maintaining a list of over 50k names of those accused. Pedophiles have been appointed elders even though they have been accused or confessed to abusing children. They recently settled a multi million dollar case, with more in the works.

In short, the Watchtower is not what it claims to be. If you are seeking good association, there are a lot better religions out there, not all "worldly people" are immoral or bad. You owe it to yourself to check things out, the truth is out there, but it's not in the Watchtower.

11

OMG They are right here in River City!

by myway2007 in

jw
friends

jacksonville, fl - the local newspaper had an article on the convention going on for the next two weekends.

while i could not find the article, i was able to find this slide show of this weekend's events.

the newspaper article was interesting as it discussed what a wonderful job they were doing cleaning the arena seats and bathrooms and everyone was enjoying their job.

LisaRose

56

JW's came to my door 6 weeks ago. I told them I was inactive.......

by Alchemist in

6 weeks ago some jws came to my door.

i've been inactive for 8 years.

after they gave their presentation i told them i was inactive.

LisaRose

I have been out longer than you, but from what I have read there is a great deal of apathy on the part of JWs these days. People do the bare minimum of door to door work and no one has time or the will to devote to others in the congregation, much less getting back lost sheep. The focus is on the Website and literature carts where JWs stand around chit chatting while people walk by.

If you don't mind my asking, why do you want to return?

51

Just found out my older brother has passed away

by stuckinarut2 in

jw
friends

i have just found out that my brother (who was one of a bunch that shared this login) has died.. he and his wife were living in another country where they once pioneered.

i didn't see him that often.. such an empty feeling.....

LisaRose

I am so sorry for your loss. I lost my brother last year, it's a very hard thing.

67

How do you feel about exJW's who resist our efforts to effect change?

by nicolaou in

i've met a few.

i'm not talking about the jw who, whether df'd or not, falls off the radar and just gets on with living a normal life - good luck to them and may there be many more!.

i mean the former jehovah's witness who is now enjoying all the benefits of a cult free life thanks to the efforts of many bloggers, posters and activists, but is critical of the efforts of someone close them to free more jws.

LisaRose

I think some people who leave are still under cult mind control to a certain extent and feel uncomfortable with criticising the Watchtower. I was that way at first, I was happy to be out but I thought the Watchtower was just misguided. It took eight years before I ventured on line and found JWN and realized how much I had been manipulated by the Watchtower.

68

Please vaccinate your children

by Viviane in

and remember your boosters as adults!.

currently there is a measles outbreak in the u.s. the outbreak is clustered into communities where parents choose not to get their children vaccinated.

vaccination works primarily on herd immunity.

LisaRose

The problem is that some children have compromised immune systems and cannot get vaccinated. Children whose parents choose not to vaccinate are a danger to them, as they can pass the these diseases on, If there are unvaccinated children in school they cannot attend and are forced to home school.

I am glad Caifornia now requires vaccinations for children to be enrolled in school. Parents who choose to not vaccinate their children are free to do so, but they will have to take responsibility for that choice and home school.

The problem with natural selection in this case is that the child is innocent in this and didn't ask to have an idiot for a parent, and they also might not die, but become disabled and a burden on society. It's no different than JW parents who refuse blood transfusions, sometimes you have to protect children from their parents.

96

Apathy trollies in my city.

by punkofnice in

is it me or are people giving them a wide berth?.

LisaRose

They have them here at the BART stations (San Francisco bay area rapid transit). My never a JW hubbie is always tempted to ask them an inconvenient question, lol. He says no one ever approaches or takes literature.

13

The "generation", how long, oh Jeehoober???

by DATA-DOG in

how long till the wtbts gets wise and reverts to boozerford's more plausible explanation of "generation"??

let's "face the facts" ( lol!!!

) and admit that this is the best explanation that the wtbts ever had.

LisaRose

They should have just stayed with that, but they just couldn't resist using impeding doom and date specific predictions to bring in new recruits and keep the faithful afraid to leave.

11

There is No Reason to be Afraid!! ( of Freedom )

by kairos in

jw
friends

thinking of leaving the jws for good is frightening.engaging a quality fade is nerve racking!there can be horrible consequences that can leave one shunned.even the most careful fade can be undone by many means and loved ones.. one must weigh the consequences of leaving with true freedom.yes, that kind.

where you always make the decisions in your own life.. no need to be reckless and wild to destruction.

be like almost everyone else in society that enjoys life to the full and looks out for their fellow.look around you at happy, friendly people in your community.

LisaRose

Well, I wouldn't say I went through gehenna to get out, my gehenna was my first marriage. As stressful as the divorce and leaving the religion was, it was still better than being married to the wrong person, that will just suck your soul right out.

My leaving the religion was a long drawn out affair, the last ten years I was mostly inactive but attended meetings. My ex was disfellowshipped, my children not interested, I don't know what stubbornness kept me going, just fear of the unknown I guess. I finally became a stronger person and started to realize their was no reason to stay in a lousy marriage and a religion that gave me nothing back either. I knew I had to get out of the marriage at least. A chance encounter (online, nothing naughty, classmates.com) with a guy I knew in high school gave me the kick in the pants I needed to cut the cord. I asked my ex to leave and started making plans within the week. He was not surprised, he knew I was done, he had many opportunities to improve, I believe he wanted me to be the bad guy. I also realized the Watchtower had given me really lousy marriage advice and that was the kick in the pants to ditch the religion as well.

A funny story about my ex that will give you a glimpse of why I left. The day he moved out I was really sick, a high fever, shakes, etc. As I lay there in misery he comes up to me and says "There's no clean towels!" I lifted my head off the pillow and just looked at him, he, not taking the hint said "What will I dry myself off with tonight?" I was too stunned to say anything. Lord help me, did a grown a$$ man of fifty just ask a sick, soon to be ex wife to wash his towels? The divorce was final in early July and it was really independence day for me.

Despite some nastiness from him, It went pretty smoothly after that, sold the house, wrote my JW mom and told her the news. I thought she would be upset but she never thought I was a good enough JW anyways, so she took it pretty well. Within months months I got a job transfer and moved out of state to be with my high school friend, we've been married fifteen years now, very happily I might add. Yes, there were transition issues, it's very hard to make huge changes in your life like that, but everything worked out.

Some want to take the band aid off slowly, but by bit (fade) but I ripped that sucker right off, a big dramatic, no turning back statement, which was the right choice for me. I never DAd or anything, moving out of state makes it hard for them to df you, although my JW family still treats me as if I had, but yes, it was totally worth it.